you know it’s crazy how I say I’m speechless about how I feel? What’s crazy is, if you read my poems, you’ll know this love is real.
So why do I say I’m speechless when I talk to you? I think it’s because you’re so well-spoken and wonderful, and I’m afraid I may say something that seems so aloof.
I can describe this speechless feeling as my breath being taken away, like I’ve been stunned by how much love you show me—I’m awestruck the care and the love that flows from you, in the way you hold me.
I feel that when I’m speechless your powerful love softly spreads upon me just right, sometimes your sweet and gentle voice comes stealing my voice like a thief in the night.
The things you speak to me are so wonderful and profound; it’s so hard to put into words this amazing love that I’ve found. It may seem funny because I’m writing words down—these words are different from the words I speak. I feel like a clown
igniting me, this little quiet ember, turned into a flame. You take this little stone and shine it up, beautiful for display.
I get this crazy emotion when it comes to you; I’m overtaken by the depth of our love. It’s never a sad emotion when tears leave my eyes because I know you’re not going anywhere; there’s really no reason to cry. Instead of speaking words, it’s easier for me to share, my emotions and words straight from my heart. I know you’ll always hear them because your always there.

I already miss you, and
I can’t wait to kiss you.

You sweet and handsome man.
I know you’re meant to be for me.
Like you’re a part of love’s divine plan.

You look so deeply into my eyes, like you’ve seen into them long before.
I feel like a creature inside your head and heart waiting to explore.

Seeing you happy and smiling makes me feel really happy too.
I get to love the sweetest of the sweet, to me the newest of the new.

This treasure that I’ve been given a chance to hold so dear, may mean nothing to some.
But for heaven’s sake, this treasure has been wonderful to me, I can’t wait for what’s to come.

He always has me, feeling in the best of ways, from today and all my yesterdays.
This sweet, handsome, and wholesome man is my baby. One of the sweetest Rays..

This man beholds a golden heart within his chest cavity.
This golden heart within his chest, I feel, beats fiercely for me.
This heart of gold that he bestows is gentle, sweet, and kind.
He takes this heart and shares his gold with me on his mind.
When he loves and truly gives some of this gold to me,
he gives me so much gold from his love it makes me feel so free.
So when he tells me, "You're worth your weight in gold,"
It makes me smile so bright and bold.
This heart of gold has filled me full of love from him.
This gold from his heart I will cherish as a gem.
His heart of gold that he beholds, he may not think he's worthy,
but his heart I surely love; I'll gladly hold it with me.

Being comfortable with you is something so profound.
It’s the feeling of your presence whenever you come around.
I feel your comfort every time at first sight.
I know I’m comfortable because everything feels just right.
The way you call me “sweetheart” and check on me always
Brings so much comfort into my everyday.
The way you hold me tightly whenever we hug—
This comfort you’re giving is better than any drug.
I’m so comfortable with you; it’s always like a dream.
I can’t believe someone like you is with me.
I’m so comfortable with you when we talk on the phone;
I feel you’re right next to me even  when I’m alone.
I feel comfort in every word you say;
I trust and respect everything you display.
You comfort me with your strong, steady hands, and I hold them so tight.
I love when our hands touch and our fingertips mingle just right.
You’re my comfort, the place I feel at rest.
Being comfortable with you, baby, sure is the best.

My someone who has crossed paths with me before.
My someone is my safe place in human form.
My someone who doesn’t judge my tears.
My someone who seems to settle all my fears.
My someone who knows my soul by looking into my eyes,
My someone with whom I get butterflies,
My someone who takes my breath away,
My someone who has brought sunshine into my skies of gray
My someone with whom we speak most when we’re quiet together,
My someone who makes me giggle as if I’m being tickled by a feather.
My someone whose touch is so sweet, for that I long.
My someone whose hands hold mine so strong.
My someone who I crave, not just romantic or ******.
My someone’s presence just makes me feel so full.
My someone instantly calms me.
You are my someone, and with you I always feel free.

      
RL❤️

Baby, where have you been all my life?
Why have I missed a connection this much?
Something I never knew could exist like this.
The words “Just so you know, you’ve captured my heart” melt me into a puddle so sweet..
Man, I’m so glad we chose to meet. Once a friendly stranger, now a love who has my heart.
I’ve literally  fell  head over heals for you.
I Wouldn’t change a thing, unless it were to know you sooner.  The way your eyes capture mine, and mine capture the light.
Shows a magical connection, as if our souls are tied together, from the strings of our hearts.
The best thing is that things only look up now. I know my heart will never give up on this man.
I hope he knows he’s stuck with me for the rest of our lives. This amazing missed connection now connected, as if it were meant for a time like this.

He says I’m rotten,
I say he’s sweet,
Looking at us both,
We share something super neat.

He says I’m beautiful,
I say he’s handsome,
We both together
Make some beautiful connection.

He says I’m a great kisser,
my lips are tender too.
I say he is amazing,
showing what our lips can do.

He says I’m sappy,
Well, he’s sappy too,
We both are the sappiest
Trees out in the mountain view.

He says I’m thinking about you,
I say I feel you thinking about me,
We both get tingles,
and feel very warm.

He says, “Have I told you how much I miss you today?”
I say, “Baby, you can tell me as many times as you can,
Because I’ve been telling you probably just as often.”
He says, “Baby, I’m sure it’s just as much as I’ve missed you.”

He says he feels like he’s in a dream.
I say, “You’re not.”
But baby if we're dreaming, baby, please don’t let them wake us up!

You healed the ache I once had.
Opened up what was once trapped.
Unexpected blessings you were to me.

All time spent with you is a relief,
Replenishing the void with you.
Everything is wonderful beside you.

Making me feel brand new,
You’re the only Medicine that I need.

Meeting the needs of heart and soul,
Every day I'd spend with you.
Deepening the healing power of love,
I'm never giving up this medicine, you.
Calming my heart and all of me,
I need you in my presence,
Need you to be my warmth,
Even need you to be the refuge in all

of life's storms.
You are my medicine; I will always take it.

Love you
I just want to
Love you, sweet man of mine
Love you right is what I want to do
Maybe soon

Hearts cry
Sudden rush of emotion
This may be tears or fears
The faster the heart beat the more cry
Hearts ache

Following those eyes threw the years.
I’d never think we’d end up here.
New connection between us two.
Destiny’s hand has led us through
You’re the only one, a
Once upon a dream
Under the brightest star in the sky
Boy, you sure are something neat
All for you is what I’d give
But for now pieces is all I’m allowed
Everyday this between us grows and
I’ll always FIND YOU BABE

Moon glows
In the darkest night
Shining in the path of us
A gentle glow casting down lighting the way
Love grows

To know someone who cares,
Who takes time to be aware.
Makes you always know that you are seen
You’re not cellophane, like you’ve felt you’ve been
In day and in night, you know that you’re blessed
When someone cares, even if you’ve been a hot mess.
To see how someone cares for their family so much.
Makes you know that they have a healing touch.
When there are words you feel you wish they knew.
But words you fear to express because they may be too out of the blue.
But when someone who cares comes along, out of the blue, just like you.
This can’t be just a coincidence, or a simple glitch in time
This has got to be something more because it’s so fine.
Taking our time getting to know each other is the most special part,
Just like the most special piece of beautiful art.
When this masterpiece is done and ready to be hung,
It’s hanging next to someone who cares,
That is where it can be hung between you and me.

Rescue in the storms of my life,
Always thoughtful to me, every day.
Yes, I yearn for you more and more.

You’re the spark brought to my life,
Opening my heart to let all of you  in.
Up into your eyes I look .

A closeness to you I long for
Respectful person in all you do.
Everyday is something new to explore
          with you
Let you linger forever with me.
Opening me up to see you completely.
Visions of him I see every single day,
Even when he’s not there,I see him
Delighted beyond measure to have
              found this man!
Ray, Always remember you are loved.

I’ll never forget that simple sweet Tuesday night .
Nerves were rushing, not because of being scared.
It was because everything felt so right .
It would be the first time we were face to face to share.
Talking about all the things that brought us there.
To see if this flame would continue to burn into a bigger fire.
From this moment I knew I would never be the same.
I have a vivid memory of what you were wearing.
A zipper fleece burgundy and some blue jeans..
Your face a spectacle,
Everything in my dreams.
Those eyes I’ve seen before,
But this time I could feel those eyes wanted the same if not even more.
Sitting as close as we could possibly sit.
I could hang on your arm and rest my head there; I would never forget.
No matter the time,
No matter the day,
I know for a fact, anytime spent with you would be simply sweet.
Just like that simply sweet Tuesday night!

I can’t imagine how much better this can be,

when it is beauty in all that I see.
Like I wandered into a dream,

the most beautiful dream you could see.
The presence of you, and the presence of me
It’s like the moment was meant to be.
So perfectly, my hand conforms to yours.
How Beautiful you kiss my hand in its small
form.
The way I fit so Beautifully under your chin.
I never want this moment to end.
When it does, your feel lingers still.
I feel as if you can’t be real.
It’s almost l like im imagining you.
There’s no possible way in the world that’s true!
The way that you look at me, so deep into my eyes.
I could live in their reflection forever and ever.
To just look at you and hear you speak.
It’s the words you don’t say that’s such a treat.
The way  I’m able to understand what this stare means from the sweetest man.
Beautiful connection ,
Beautiful spark.
Beautiful,  just so beautiful ,it just goes straight to my heart.
I feel I could be in your presence all of the time, we would  never get bored.
I’d always have you as mine.
I promise I’m not taking you away for only me.
But man if there was a choice with you, I would flee.
Beautiful stranger,
Beautiful friend,
Beautiful  moments,
That have just began.
Just beautiful…..

I get to see this sweet man today.

He’s been running through my mind for days; I’d question if he even knows.

What strength his heart can hold!

But I know one thing for sure:
He’s already gotten this heart of mine to cure.

Have we been here before?
It seems all too familiar,
A very welcome, once-upon-a-memory.

It’s crazy how, with each other, you can be, you and, I can be me.

Communication flows like a river in continuous motion.

Not knowing where to go next,
But knowing there will be a next time.

It’s a spectacular feeling.
I can’t wait for when we get to see,
How much stronger our bond will be.

Getting to see this sweet man today
Has  given me the happiest outlook.
Oh, what it could it eventually be.

Sunray
She sits alone in this darkened room,
She’s made friends with the shadows and prays silently in the gloom.

Hiding in the shadows away from all the light.
Little does she know, you can’t always hide from the bright.

That’s when glimmers of hope begin to appear.
The dust starts to rise in the light of rays breaking away her fear.

That’s when the sunrays suddenly shine right in her eyes.
She’s in awe and wonders asking questions why?

All but suddenly standing to look around her illuminated, once-darkened space.
Such motivating brightness made it hard to turn her face.

This was a divine blessing in crepuscular rays.
She felt she could live in this light for days.

Sunrays sent from heaven by the Son of God above.
For in this moment, she realized she had been divinely blessed by the whitest of doves.

She found strength in a cosmic anointing as God heard her silent prayers.
The sunrays now glisten, golden strands in her hair.

God showed her his everlasting love and promise for her depression.
She now stands to face God in his glorious light where she learns her lesson.

She overcame darkness through God’s holy words, “But for you who honor me, goodness will shine upon you like the sun, with healing in its rays” (Mal 4:2).

Majestical sunrays shine down onto us here below.
showing us God cares and we should never let go.

Leanne written December 2024

Serendipity
Sweet, unexpected serendipity.
This deep bond has taken hold of us.
An unexpected force of emotion
Shot straight into our hearts,
A powerful, serendipitous feeling, so profound and sweet.
This happy accident started a great, ongoing connection.
Bringing its breathtaking power to our Unexpected souls.
We are together on this ride of sweet serendipity.
It’s true: there is a beautiful beginning for me and you.

Warmth
Warm internal feeling
Warm like a real embrace
Warm like a cozy fireside
But the warmth from you feels the best
At least I imagine it would be
Not a question or doubt in my mind
That it can feel and warm the entirety of me
This warmth your soul possesses, to me, is in another world, so intimate and enticing.
This has me feeling you’re here with me, even when you’re not.
A warmth I long for, even in the softest embrace.
This warmth between us is brand new.
Imagine what more time will do!

Coming out of a fog
It’s like you’ve been hidden away and out of sight;
Like you are invisible, no matter how much you fight.
This thin veil that once hid my face
Is now showing bright light;
it has been given such grace.
Coming out of the fog is such a beautiful thing;
Nothing is better than seeing what it brings.
This instant connection to the other side.
To feel the fog brush over my face
Makes me feel like I’m leading race.
What a treasure it is to be seen and heard,
With just the simplest of his words.
His voice envelops me like the warmest hug,
It’s wildly crazy that it’s been hidden under a rug.
The chill from the fog as I’m passing through
Makes me feel like the only presence here in this room.
I get these crazy chills all across my arms.
I know that this fog I pass through won’t cause me any harm.
My heart beats faster; I get a huge smile.
It’s quite amazing, even between  many miles.
It feels like you’ve been beside me throughout each day.
Man, it’s crazy how fast we connected this way.
To think I once knew this man before, But not really knowing him much, I can’t wait to learn more.
The passionate, intimate, and emotional feeling,
The spark seems to be igniting a fire
showing a deep connection with new meaning.
Experiencing this with you fills my heart so fine.
I'll be yours, and you will be mine.

Don't let this dream I dream slip away, don't let it leave the brightest spotlight of my day.

Silent like a sundial in the sunshine,
I can only wish to claim you as mine.

I promise I'm just orbiting the sun in its natural RAYs.
You're a beacon of hope shining through the sunbeams today.

For the moments we share, reaching out to my friend,
in heart, mind, and soul, this bond can never end.

Let our bond be one of a kind,
special, just as we dream,
like a lighthouse searching with its brightest beam.

I'm here not to possess you,
just to bask in the warmth of your words and smile.
Your presence is like still waters on the sea across the miles.

In the beautiful colors of life, you're the most beautiful shade I've seen.
The laughter flows naturally and gently, like water rolling in a stream,

Talking like we are weaving a beautiful tapestry with our words.
Time, like wings that grow on the most beautiful bird.

In your presence, I only wish to exist  one day.
Please don't stop showing me that I am worth the stay.

Of all the time passing, of all the days apart,
keep me close to you, in your thoughts and in your heart.



Leanne ☀️

Mold me


Like clay that can be recycled,
Then formed into something new.
This clay, like a rebirth, now loved,
This new reinvention shows the new you.
Like in the potter’s hands, he molds a beautiful shape,
One that once was just a lump of clay.
The potter’s hands can make this art anew, escape—
Like helping shape someone’s life one day.
We are like clay, being worked and formed.
This process is like the improvement of oneself.
Unlike the piece that once was unformed,
Now becomes something beautiful to display on a shelf.

The color blue,
not just a random hue.
Blue begins the start of each day and continues through the night.  
Blue like the sadness you feel when your not feeling right.
Blue as the tears falling from your cheek when you start to overthink.
Blue like the deep waters; some will tread, others will sink.
Blue like the birds who flutter their wings high in the nest,
and stay snuggled under their mother’s breast.
Blue like the blood pulsing in your veins keeps your body living.
Blue like the color eyes you stare deep they just keep giving.  
Blue like the bluebells growing in a patch,
just putting a smile on your face when you pass.
Blue like the hottest part of a flame from a fire,
never touch no matter how much you desire.
Blue like the flag that holds the white stars tight representing our freedom and our rights.
Blue like your fingers and toes getting frozen from the weather, making it hard to move
Blue like the moon that Elvis sang about and he swooned us, too.
Blue can be the faintest hue to the deepest hue.
Blue can always look so good on you,
no matter what your mood,
What’s not to love about the color blue?

What it feels like when I can’t breathe.
Like some thief just stole my joy,
Made me gasp for air.
It happens like this,
when I feel like no one cares.
Why am I like this?
So emotional,
Don’t they know it kills me,
to not be normal?
If I breathe in and out…
Like everyone else does.
Maybe I wouldn’t panic,
The endless teardrops barge past, my bloodshot, swollen eyes
Nothing about this is normal
But yet they criticize
Stop crying.
Just breathe.
There’s no need for tears.
It’s like being mocked has become my biggest fear.
It makes me feel insane.
And feel suffocated.
I know im not crazy,
I know im just different.
But for someone who suffers from, PTSD, there’s a big difference.
I have had my struggles and emotional trips. I have obsessive-compulsive thoughts that get stuck like a switch.
Some say it’s easy to handle
Just don’t think about it.
But once something is in my head, leaving doesn’t exist.
So if I’ve ever cared for you, you’re always in my head.
There’s no way for you to disappear even with a single med.
I just want to breathe normally.
I just want to be seen.
I just want to be okay.
I just want to be me.

Time checker  

I’m always a time checker,
Looking at my watch to see the time.

Questioning what’s coming up?
Looking always to see if im behind.

I hate to ever show up late to things,
But never like to be to early.

The countdown is always on ,
Waiting for the end of the day for me.

Always Checking how much time I have left before I go to sleep,
Until it’s time to wake.
So I can be awake and refreshed.

And take on another crazy day.
These crazy things I think about!
This silly thing called time.

Isn’t so silly when it goes to fast,
or seems to go to slow.
I hate spending so much time alone,

I love to be around the ones I love.
So maybe I can take a break from being a time checker and spend more time  just going with the flow.

Because there is one thing that’s for sure, time’s a precious thing,
So with me always checking time,
I’m just pushing away this beautiful life of mine.

Hanging in the gallery of my soul, decorating the walls. I’ve hung many canvases, some that you have never seen.

The wall behind me holds a portrait,  painted beautiful with hues of green and blue; this portrait shows things in life that have never been.

Next, you will see a canvas painted with a beautiful bouquet, showing all the things I’ve given away in life.

Look to your left—don’t turn too far, you might miss this tiny masterpiece that some call art. This tiny art piece shows the littlest kidney bean in the palm of my hand. What was once a dark spot on it, now removed, shows how much grace this little thing has produced.

As you walk by, you see a hanging, almost clear sheet; this is what it feels like when people look at me.

On the wall behind the sheet is a beautiful display showing many footprints of everyone who has walked in my life today.

In the corner, on a little shelf, a broken vessel sits. This vessel was put back together without its biggest piece. Though tattered and misshapen, this vessel still shows so much beauty.

On the biggest wall, by itself, you see a boldly shaped red heart painted so brightly; this piece shows how my heart feels when I am being loved just right.

So, as you have walked and wandered in this gallery of my soul, I hope you find comfort and know that not all of your precious art can be sold.

My lighthouse in storms
And times of life is you.

My lighthouse is my hope,
When things feel they may fall through.

My lighthouse guidance has helped, me endure the unthinkable
Helps me through times I need, healing and making sacrifices whenever able.

My lighthouse is such a guiding force,
Guiding me toward the correct turns, in the road to follow love’s course.

My lighthouse is stability, helping to steady me in its hold,
Never letting me go, a safe haven for me to live like gold.

My lighthouse guides me at night in my dreams,
Helping me follow all aspirations, always on my team.

My lighthouse is the light in my vision,
Helping to show clarity in all that’s been.

My lighthouse is my security always,
Keeping me safe and under a watchful light, in any unknown doorway.

My lighthouse stays ever steady in its love;
I’m always looking for its guiding light above.

What do you see when you look my way?
Do you see me, or do you see something else?
Do you see all the imperfections I possess?
These imperfections make me feel less.
Like the shell of a girl in a picture frame.
Do you see what I see in the mirror looking back at me?
A body, all deformed but shapely; this body has had two beautiful babies.
What do you see when you look at my face?
Do you see the unevenness of my eyebrows and the squint in my left eye?
Maybe there are enough glasses for it to hide behind.
Do you see the freckles splattered on my face?
The sun hasn't been gentle on this aging face.
What do you see when you look at me?
Do you see my darkened eyes, so deep and dark that the colors almost don't shine?
Do you see this hair? It's starting to thin with little strands of gray.
What do you see when you look at this aging woman who is almost forty years old?
Maybe…me?

Between the world and me,
a fateful friend,
a flowing fountain.
Between the world and me,
a picture in a frame,
a field of wildflowers.
Between the world and me,
a night that keeps the stars
and hangs the moon.
Between the world and me,
a compass to a map,
a ray of sunshine.
Between the world and me,
a book with a bookmark
marking my spot,
a happy ending to a story.
Between the world and me,
you are a lamp guiding me
into my dreams,
a song without words,
written in stone.
All the wonderful things
between the world and me.

Cover me in blankets
Cover me in warmth
Cover me from heartache
Cover me from storms
Cover me when I'm frightened
Cover me when I'm alone
Cover me with sweetness
Cover me with joy
Cover me with justice
Cover me with peace
Cover me with protection
Cover me while I sleep
Will you cover me always?
Cover me with your amazing grace
I know you will cover me
You don't see me as a disgrace
You cover me because I am yours
You gave your life for me
You cover me every day when you're watching over me
My comfort and my fortune
My eternal friend
You've covered me from the beginning
And you'll cover me till the end

In the quiet space of friendship,
is a place in which we fly
Not lovers, but friends under the same
stars in the same big, old sky.

Our bond, like a tapestry, threaded
and woven with care.
A sweet, pure friendship with such beautiful flair—

No need for the moon to whisper into our ear,
for there's  laughter, stories, and music we hear.

It's in this friendship dance that we do.
We both seem like mirrors,
reflecting each other.
A bond that's pure, almost
like sister and brother.

So here's to something that
will live on like space—
this friendship with you,
time cannot erase.

For in the end, you and I wll always be
such wonderful friends.

What’s the dill pickle?
Why are you so green?
Where do you come from?
Why do people think you’re mean?

You always taste so yummy,
Making my tummy very glad.
When I can’t have pickles, I
Get very sad.

Those green delicious spears such a delightful treat.
Some like them sour, and some weird ones like them sweet.

Pickles are the best snack in a lunch to pack,
Take them on a picnic, or eat them straight off the rack.

The best pickles are the ones straight from the cold.
Don’t forget the baby pickles; those things are so bold.

So when you hear, “What’s the dill pickle?”
Don’t think someone is asking you what’s up.
It’s them showing how much they love this snack.
This little snack you love to crunch.

I can't explain my feelings why do I feel so sad?
It's almost as if I'm angry,
Leanne, why do you get so mad?
I feel like I'm alone here just all by myself,
waiting for the clock to tick, or turn the page to something else.
So emotional, so forgotten, and so blue.
Leanne, why does it feel like no one knows what the hell you're going through?
It's not very easy you can't just flip a switch.
It's almost like I have a scratch that can't even itch.
My emotions are so crazy I'm right here on the edge.
Please tell my mind to "stop it", "get away from that ledge".
I don't wish to harm me, or anybody else.
I just feel like I'm suffering, deep inside myself.
Leanne, what is this mess you have become?
What wrong inside your mind?
Can I please just feel normal and not crazy all the time.
My hands get so shaky, the biggest tears start to fall.
Sometimes they last a minute, then sometimes they don't stop for long.
I don't understand, I feel happy but my emotions get so confused.
I've got all I've ever wanted, but control of my own mood.
I may be a big baby, at least that what I feel I am.
Leanne can you please act like an adult now and not some childish little lamb?
Here I am almost forty years old, is that whats wrong with me?
Have I gotten to the age now, I feel bad for being me.
I feel like someone is always asking me why, when the tears start to flow.
It's like they have a problem with "I don't really know".
I know I'll be alright, and everything will be just fine.
I just feel I need someone around or beside me all the time.
Leanne Stop it!,get out of your head.
Look alive your not bed stricken or dead.
You have such beauty in your life, Leanne just smile!
I feel like sometimes Leanne is just letting everybody down.

Orbit

Put a satellite into orbit;
The galaxy will watch it with the stars.

The ones set in place for all to see
Tell us stories of who you are.

The influence of this earthly planet,
The way the gravitational force occurs.

In astronauts’ celestial explorations,
This space full of stars is yours.

The way the Earth orbits the biggest and brightest star.
Is the way this satellite orbits among the moon.

Never stopping to settle down,
But knowing this satellite is orbiting around.

Always moving,
I’ll never stop waiting.

The satellite will be coming back around again for me.

I remember beautiful daisies
from when I was just a child.

The world around me seemed
to be so big and wild.

When I was young,
I would always pick the
biggest daisy I could find.

Id walk along the concrete
to see who would be mine.

“He loves me, he loves me not.”

Is what I would say,
as I pulled each perfect petal
from its beautiful display.

Not to harm it, but to cherish
it's wish for me that day.
That’s why I still grab a daisy
every time I see one when I pass by.

Once this  beautiful daisy has  
bloomed. It has a special magic trick
that it likes to do so it doesn’t die.

It’s also been given the name “day’s eye.”

When night comes,
it closes its petals over
the “eye” of the day past.

Then morning  comes and the daisy
opens its petals like a ray,
and the “eye” is ready for its new day at last.

As I’ve gotten older,
I don’t see many daisies around.

If I do, I grab one and
pull it from the ground.

This pretty little daisy,
hidden in the weeds,

Does it really answer
who truly loves me?

I often wish, as I did
when I was a little child,

That life would be just that innocent,
filled with cheerfulness and joy,
like this symbolic flower
does today in the wild.

Im way to critical of myself,
It’s always something in my heart,I never feel I’m rested.

My brain gets too invested.

It’s like im a ticking time bomb, But not one that explodes.

But one who never knows when,Her emotions start to show.

Sometimes there’s  not a reason for All this silly pain.

It’s all seems pretty trivial,Seems to make me feel insane.

I hate to see my reflection  in the mirror On the wall.

Maybe that could be the problem.It’s just looking at all my flaws.

I never have liked what I see, i’ve always known why.

Can’t I just be pretty, to everyone else’s eyes?

I know looks don’t matter, It’s all just what inside your heart.

When critical of yourself, It’s when these feelings start.

I know I have my issues and probably drive people crazy.

I can’t help I get excited, I’m such a silly daisy.

I know I always ramble about nonsense all the time.

But see if im talking to someone then I’m keeping them occupied.

They won’t be so quick to judge me by how I come across.

Im really not trying to be anybody boss.

I always feel like when I turn my back.

Im the topic of discussion , on all the things I lack.

Will I ever be normal and not so in my head?

It’s starts in the morning and never settles till I’m in bed.

I guess im not the only one with this struggle everyday.

“Take a breath”, “Calm down”, “You’re going to be okay”.  

See, it’s never that easy; it’s not just the flip of a switch.

For if it were I wouldn’t feel like sometimes  I’m  such a *****.

I never mean to come off angry,  or even cut people off.

It’s just another product of one of my many flaws.

So, if you feel like me and are hypercritical, too.

Just know that there’s someone out there who knows exactly what you’re going through.

Anxiety and Fear

Looks like you’re holding a snow globe so intricate and sweet.
Once shaken, the snow starts falling in big sheets.

For this fragile snow globe is not ever really clear.
When it’s shaken and shaken again, then comes the fear.

You can’t see inside to the beautiful scene.
You start to panic; will the view ever be clean?

You keep shaking the snow globe harder and harder, and then,
The questions and anxiety creep right on in.

Will I ever get to see into this beautiful globe?
Why is it so hard to see through the snow?

Why is it like this, what did I do this time?
I’m always ruining something I feel every time .

This perfect snow globe will never be the same.
Why does it feel like I’m going insane?

I’m a huge mess of tears and fears.
This precious snow globe doesn’t deserve to be here.

I then take a seat and set the globe down.
Upon my face, there’s such a big frown.

I’m upset with myself; what did I do?
I’ve broken something beautiful, shiny, and new.

It’s then when I look at that snow in the globe start to slow down.
It starts to settle back down to the ground.

I start to breathe slower; the tears and fear calm their war.
It is then that I realize what I have done, and all becomes clear—

that I do have some power over my anxiety and fear.

Leanne

Under the moonlight, into the deep darkness,
The pale indigo moonbeams shine on all things here on Earth.
The stillness in the air causes the trees to stand alert.
Moonlight shines onto the creek where your dreams overflow.
I'm holding onto the moonlight casting down towards the dirt,
hitting rocks and pebbles like hidden silver treasure for me to search.
Each star, specifically placed in the sky, shines down, sparkling like diamonds into my eyes.
They reach the dull, dark brown hue and make them shine bright and new.
Down here, the nighttime sky guides me from behind,
sure to light the way so I am safe and secure from the deep darkness ahead.  
As I look, I see a white, cotton-like pillow on the ground.
It seems to be be a cloud that has fallen down.
It's not just a cloud that lay undisturbed,
but it's lit from within, like stars and moonbeams were placed inside.
This pillow is hard to resist; the comfort is evident from the sight of it.
I grab it up into my arms and hold it tight.
I carry it inside to sleep with it for the night.
I fall asleep so easily and relaxed with this pillow under my head.
Instantly dreaming of the nighttime sky that rescued me from the darkness I can finally leave behind.

Emotional release,
A cleansing for your soul.
Sadness has a way to cease;
Happiness is on a roll.
The shock of life’s moments,
These are raindrops of the soul.
Expressing what you feel inside,
No need for noise or attention.
Just showing raw emotion,
Sometimes even in a rage.
These are the silent words of the soul,
The flow of sorrow’s river.
When grief or sadness draws near,
Emotional breakdowns and uncontrollable sadness—maybe fear?
These things happen to anyone.
These tiny little drops of dew,
Like those on the fresh morning green,
Are just tiny teardrops we all have seen.
If you haven’t, don’t say you never will.
These drops fall like a steady rain,
Not to hurt you or bring you down;
These are healing for you,
Like a medicine you release to relieve yourself.
These are your tears.

These **** bottles of pills.
What kind of person have you made me?
When I take these little pills.
It’s only to alter some brain chemistry.

Lately it seems as if they are making me mad.
Quickly destroying all that I have.
These **** bottles of pills,
Yell out from the shelf.
“Please take me I’m here for your mental health”.
The problem with these **** little pills,
Is are they causing a problem, not letting me be free.

Tuning me into a mess, and not letting me be me.
This plastic facud I place on everyday.
Let’s me fake out everyone, Like,
“look she’s okay”.
Really though am I?
Have you seen this whack?

I’ve become obsessive, angry, and an emotional train wreck.
It’s taken over my sweet little brain.
Makes me feel as if I’m insane.

“Take this pill for your anxiety, even though it says depression”
“Oh and take this one, it will help you focus.”
“But keep in mind it also keys you up so your anxiety may be running little a muck.”
“Oh and don’t forget these pills they will settle you down, help you not have another run of the mill panic attack.”

Lets be real for a minute, let me ask you a question, how do you know that?
Only I know the real me and the one whos mind is off track.
Sometimes I feel like these pills are making me lose all control.
Like I have no say in what my brain tells these idle hands to hold.

I just jump in headfirst and keep diving in,
Not thinking of others’ hearts and what I might do to them.
Moral of the story is: Stop blaming the bottle of pills.
Keep control of yourself; don’t let yourself falter.
Find other things to occupy your brain rather than laying your pills on the altar.
Don’t worship the pills like it’s the only way out.

You are the person you were meant to be.
Let’s take away this mental health stigma and stand up for yourself.
I promise you’re really not crazy.
We all suffer from some type of mental health issue; you are not lazy.

She's always in her mind,
looking for things she can never find.
She's chasing crazy dreams and wishes.
She's always chasing ***** dishes.
She's always in her mind,
looking for love she left behind.
She's always overthinking every situation,
causing her to wander to higher elevations.
She's always in her mind,
running from troublesome thoughts on the carousel you wind.
She's a worrier, always expecting the worst.
Why did she ever think of these troublesome thoughts at first?
She's always in her mind,
always working and on the grind.
She has to finish what she starts.
When she doesn't, she feels she shatters beautiful art.
She's always in her mind,
looking for ways she can always be kind.
She feels she's doing something sweet
when she gives loved ones things she finds neat.
She's always in her mind,
feeling as if she's leaving people behind,
she stresses over how others feel.
It makes her upset, almost ill.
She's always in her mind,
almost as if she feels confined, like a person locked in a room,
like she's chained and faces an uncertain doom.
She's always in her mind,
almost as if she were dressed up and disguised; she puts on a mask to show off a smile. Sometimes it's something you haven't seen for a while.
She's always in her mind,
Maybe it's what she was prescribed.
She sometimes feels crazy and she doesn't fit in.
But boy does she love when she's pulled into them.
She's always in her mind a scary place to be, but if she weren't in her mind, she wouldn't be.

Powdered concrete broken down,
Rocks show on the barren ground.
Tiny particles of dust and sand,
The dirt is rich in this poor land.
But you see a **** poke from a crack—
That's just a sign of beauty, new growth pushing concrete back.
The **** bares a sight of simple charm,
The sweetest daisy, growing strong, green leaves for arms.
The beauty this daisy possesses shows such grace;
It shines upon her yellow florets, her face.
What beauty comes from something walked on,
Something that's kicked and never looked upon!
This beautiful daisy, not only a new birth from the ground,
Shows signs of a new beginning and joy all around.