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Nomkhumbulwa Aug 2018
"I Wish I Was A Fridge"

I trust no one,
But I agree to see you;
You come every six weeks,
To see anything new.

I hardly know you,
I saw you last year;
I've seen others since then,
I know im difficult - thats clear.

But you came back again,
because there's no one else,
I have to trust you again,
When I dont trust myself.

But should I really trust you?
Or are you the same?
I hadnt seen you for so long
..i'd forgotten your name.

You ask me to explain,
And I try my best,
To explain whats in my head,
All the confusion and the rest.

I tell you everything,
With paper and pen;
Absolutely everything,
over and over again.

Then you say you cant help me,
So I feel even worse,
You say you are not a therapist,
I should have remembered that first.

All you care about
is whats in my fridge;
You go into my kitchen,
and check out my fridge.

Well the fridge is fine,
It might not be full,
But it has milk and leftovers,
...I wish it had wine too!!

You come here and visit,
And then I feel worse;
For I trusted you with things,
I should have thought again first.

For you cannot help me,
Why do you come?
My fridge is always quite happy,
My fridge is having great fun.

It has no nervous system,
No brain, no spinal cord;
Its incapable of "feeling"
Or trusting in the Lord.

You come all this way,
To look at my fridge,
You come here from Lamlash,
And check out my fridge.

I am clearly a failure,
As its always the same;
The fridge is just fine,
The pain is in my brain.

I wont see you again
for quite a while;
But I cannot promise
to put on a smile.

But my fridge will be fine,
I can promise you that;
If only I was a fridge...
...does anyone else feel like that?!

I shall get out some pens,
And draw a big smiley face;
Stick it on my fridge,
Just for you and your "fridge case".

I wish I was a fridge too, could put in and take out what I choose;
But im not an inanimate object - im a human being,
And I do often wonder....what got me into this state ...in the beginning.

All the best...with love...from the fridge :/ x
Rambling poetry during moments of frustration....not knowing who to turn to.
Umi Aug 2018
On that day which caused my voice to disappear,
All those around me rejoiced and had a feast, celebrating this moment
The words I say brought people tremor, fear or just pure hatred,
Everyone hated them the moment I moved my lips to convey along side them in hope to find someone who could become even a friend.
I was of course wrong all along, deserted for the reason that they found what I said in some sense weird or obscure, maybe irrational,
Was it my means or my purpose that scared them away ?
My looks or my style of conveying to appear more likable to them ?
In the end it didn't even matter for a second, as their false smiles carried the message of their fake friendship and intentions.
Maybe now that I won't have to converse with sound any further, those words of mine might reach someones heart and touch it instead,
But that is simply a distant dream, because everyone hates the words I say, perhaps it is meaningless to seek meaning in my useless self,
All I can do now is to heave in sobs,
Left behind, I can no longer even cry,

~ Umi
Diana Garcia Jul 2018
And now I can get over you the way I should have
Knowing I didn’t do all that I could have
Now I can wallow in regret
Cause my ego had done nothing but bring me dread.
Remorse.
It’s my own fault my hearts so coarse
Now you have two daughters with her
For better
For worse
This whole time I thought I was cursed
But I was just getting ready to ride the hearse
In a hurry to be buried
I’ve done my worse
This is all new
This part ain’t rehearsed  
You went from not even crossing my mind
To being  featured in my verse
It hit me like a ton of bricks
I hope this feeling
Ain’t the type that sticks

If my man finds out
He’ll have a fit
He’ll pick a corner for me to sit
Like a piece of furniture
But I guess this is what I get..
Therapy.. can’t kive with it.. can’t  live without it..


#pastlove

At least I’ve gained some perspective
a M b 3 R Jul 2018
stop torturing him please
it hurts me to know that
he is suffering
the voices
in his head
please just quieten down
and never echo back again
just let him have his peace
and a normal life
stop making him feel that he is the worse
when he is not
he feels like a failure
when he is not
he is so much more
so stop telling him
that he is not
when are you ever going to stop hurting him
please hush
well i hope that he is alright (my friend). i really wish that the voices can go away. but it isnt that easy :/
Mane Omsy Jun 2018
Scorpions poison with their tales
But they can't speak poison
Tigers **** with their claws and teeth
But they can't spread lies
Snakes hiss fear into hearts
But they never rip your mind
III Jun 2018
I had a dream
A little while back,

But it's been gnawing
And aching
And beating itself
Against my swimming (drowning) head,

Because in this dream
We were fighting
     (Like usual)
And I told you to
     "Be worse"
So I could stop missing you,
And time could remember
How to tick again

And you looked me in my eyes,
Through my eyes
And you screamed,
You told me you were trying your best.
Hollow Steve May 2018
If a wish was true,
And nothing else was  permanent.

I'd have some sort of relevance,
nothing really.
Just a point of others distances,
Its not like we're truly alone
Maybe not

How else do you help the others...
*** helllp themmmm everyonnnnnenenenenefuckkkkkk
Amanda Kay Burke May 2018
I try so hard to
Make your life better but I
Only make it worse
It's like the harder i try the more damage i cause
DW Mar 2018
god I'm sad all the time

I don't want to be and I don't mean to be
but I am.

I feel it in my heart
and in the pit of my stomach.

The never ending sadness that just continues to consume me.

There are few moments
where the sadness disappears for just a while
but then it's back.

.. and
even
worse ..
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