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You questioned my virtue
After witnessing all the things that I’ve been through
From the time I kept my heavily gates locked and suffered the repercussion
A swollen face and minor concussion
To the time I had a miscarriage scared and alone
We still loved each other but first I needed the father of my child to atone..
I always thought my honesty was something you adored
Never thought the day would come where you would be the one calling me a *****
I could never be this open with anybody other than you.
I thought you were my best friend but now that couldn’t be any less true.
You used to tell me everything
From the highlight of your nights to the grimiest of schemes
Something along the way was lost
I sit and wonder what it could be
Now I cry cause I can’t remember the last time
you kissed my forehead ever so gently
Your kisses aren’t the same
But whose to blame
I remember the time when I could fall asleep in your arms
I hated how those pictures of me passed out They didn’t do any justice for my girlish charms..
I thought you knew me and my insecurities
I thought I knew you but I look at you now and I don’t know who is standing in front me
I’m sure you feel the same
I don’t know how it got to this to point
and I sure as **** don’t know who to blame..
What if it could be a good thing
Maybe the birth of our son will give us a new song to sing
I still want to be your wife but
I guess I should be grateful that I’ll always be in your life
I always wanted to have your child, I wanted at least four.
I don’t know where you’ll be after you walk out that door..
And I’ve never been so scared
Never thought the day would come where I wouldn’t be spared
Will you ever come back?
You’re harder to reach the further you fade to black..
Just a pregnant woman left alone with all her hormones
Diana Garcia Jan 5
I’ve been hurt before
1, 2, 3 times maybe more..
Each time a little different,
and more painful than the last.
All caused by the same ghost who
haunts me from my past..
They say the 3rd time is a charm
but I never realized an entity could cause such harm.

As my belly begins to swell
The apparition decided now
is the time to drag me to ****.
My unborn child is innocent, I cried
Spare him and take me
but the man he once was has died
Only his spirit remains
And all the things he eventually became.

What was once warm to the touch
or sweet to the taste.
Is now cold and bitter and wants to lay my soul to waste.
I clench and cry for what grows in my abdomen
as he greets and pays the lonely ferrymen.
I pray to the gods, this can’t be real and if so
Please give me the strength to survive yet another hellish ordeal.
Diana Garcia Sep 2018
Missing you as much as I do
Starting to premeditate all the ways I could drop a clue
In your presence is when I felt my loveliest
Tried to replace you cause now I’m at my loneliest.
Can’t forget how much you want me to get better
Your pep talks couldn’t have gotten me any more wetter

Lately I haven’t been able to sleep
Compared to you everyone just seems so bleak
I toss and turn and don’t realize it’s getting late
Can’t even bring myself to *******
I get aggravated cause I can’t get you out of my head
Especially when I picture that other ******* your bed

Then I remember all the childish things I did
Don’t want to let history repeat itself, god forbid
Our friendship might not ever be the same
But for that only I’m not the only one to blame
Why did you have to move on so fast
When you led me to think what we shared was something that could last
I’ve never wanted to try so hard
I wanted to be the only and last girl you brought to the yard.

Can’t seem to end this poem
My hearts pounding and all I can think is
“I can’t wait to show him”
You say my company isn’t something you’re missing
Can’t stop the tears as I watch the videos of us kissing
I captured a moment where you said
Those three words that put my insecurity to bed
Here we go again
Diana Garcia Sep 2018
I feel brand new
I’ve got a new set of goals
No more excuses
No more switching roles
I am me and I can swim myself to safety
Only way out of the gutter is up
It’s about time it goes beyond words it’s going to be tough
All that matters is that I know I’m enough
If I love myself as a person
Somebody will want to **** me rough
The way i like it, I’ve always wanted to be like Alexa from spy kids
Smart and real force to be reckoned with
I’ve got the tools, it’s about time I finished school
I want him admire me while I whipe off his drool
I’ve never wanted to love myself so much before..
I’m such a fool

This whole time I’ve wanted to be a queen
But was never good enough for the king
Diana Garcia Sep 2018
I finally ******* get it
I need to know when to stop
I need to know when to focus
Enough of the smoke and mirrors
And all the hocus pocus
I’ve got to be preoccupied
To keep everything off my mind
What am I doing with my time?
Am I only a distraction
Instead of being the action
People wanna move
Standing still will make em snooze
Instead of being tight
I’ve never tried with all my might
Nobodies going to tell me what to do
If I expect it I’ll be *******
I cant let my **** be loose
Waking up is only the beginning
The rest of the day still needs some filling
My level needs to be higher
So I can gain and be desired
My brain had gone haywire
But I’ve finally fixed the wires
Finally some of my demons can retire
There are more moments when my head is clear now
Maybe I can finally get the standing ovation while I bow
I want to inspire
Be more than just admired
I want to truly be love
Tired of the when push comes to shove
I don’t want to fight anymore
There’s somebodies children I want to bore
What kind of mother would I be if I was just another chore
Diana Garcia Sep 2018
Here comes the epiphany
The moment where I finally gain some sanity
Before I was aware now I’m finally self aware
I can finally see what’s in my 1000 yard stare
When did I ever become so eager
Where did it begin?
Maybe it’s the child that’s lost within
who was deprived of attention
Finally the attention did come but it was unfortunately through molestation
My heart races for it, my mind paces for it
People I love find it hard do ignore it
It’s about time I stopped boring it
It it it it it
**** attention
I don’t even need a mention
Why should I cry
Pry my heart and let it dry
I’m so angry at myself
How the **** did I put my own needs on the shelf
**** this
No more excuses
It’s time to stop being so useless
People see I don’t take care of myself
Why did I put my dignity on the shelf
I need to stop substituting those things for the elf
I don’t need help
That’s why they all yelp
I need to get off my ***
I have no reason for sass
I’m not the ****
I’ve got a lot of more to work on than I’d like to admit
I’m like a roller coaster
Diana Garcia Aug 2018
You used to sweet
& now you ain’t much of a treat
Unless you want some meat
When you want some of this ***
All of sudden you’ve got some class
& All it takes is a little sass
To remind you who you trying to **** with
Fool me once, fool me twice,
Third times a charm is a myth
******* you’re unappreciative
Once you had me inebriated
Now all I ever am is ******* irritated
I see the man I love but all I feel is hate for you
I walk away cause now I know it’s through
Don’t even think about coming back without bringing some fast food
Cause that’s all your good for now my dude
Your tongue used to make my toes curl
Now thinking about making love and everything you’ve done makes me want to hurl
I’m sorry lady boy, you’re going to have to find yourself a new girl..
About the angel who should of went to ****
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