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Norelle Ziebell Jan 2017
The people that raised you want to hurt you
The people you call friends laugh at you
Talking behind your back
You hearing every word
But they don’t care they want you to hear
Poking
Teasing
Slapping
Stabbing
It never seems to stop
You want to end everything to make it go away
Free from pain
Free from suffering
You can’t control what they do
Control is something they have over you
But you found a way to had control
If you don’t eat then you have control
Finally
As weight drops
Your bones become clear and visible to the world
You don’t want to stop
That’s when they start to ask if you're okay
The people that raised you
Your so called friends
They say they are worried about you
But you know it’s fake
They don’t care at all
They never did and they never will
You become this person with great control
But that all comes to a pause when you meet her
You want to get to know her
But you can see the worry in her eyes that is for you
How skinny you have become
And how you have changed
Every day she tries to get you to eat
As you take a bite you can see how happy it is making her
The control you’ve once gained is slowly slipping away
You see what it is doing to your body
You hate it
But you will do it for her
She knows you’re doing it for her
It makes her feel special
She knows yours eating again
But what she doesn’t know is the marks on your ankles
That you have done to yourself
It’s a way of letting the pain go
But she doesn’t see it that way
She sees it that you are hurting yourself
You see how worried this makes her
You need to change
You don’t want to be this person anymore
You tell her so
A smile appears on her face
You will do anything to make her happy
Little do you know
She will do anything
Just to keep you safe
Feliz G Sep 2016
This anxiety tries to **** me,
Time and time again,
Makes me fuss over little problems,
It keeps on whispering, "This is the end."

I try to shoo it away,
But it doesn't want to let go,
Now depression comes by,
To sing along with anxiety's deadly song.

It keeps messing with my mind,
And other people tell me to relax,
But depression gets the best of me,
My mind is starting to crack.

I always thought this was a phase,
Everyone would just go though,
But I'm sure this is different,
According to someone I knew.

It tries to drown me,
In my past of regret,
I don't want to give up,
I just don't want to yet.

"Oh no, I needed this!",
"Oh no, I forgot about that...",
Responsibility, it seems,
Is what I tend to lack.

I wasn't always like this,
I used to be very responsible,
I used to like to be a leader,
But my mistakes don't seem flammable.

I don't know the true meaning of depression,
Anxiety is mostly what I have,
But itself is enough,
To make me insane, to make me laugh.

So please leave me alone,
Please leave me to my thoughts,
But I hear my anxiety bellow,
"Just give up, you don't have a chance."

I don't know which to believe,
I just end up crying,
Sometimes I just wonder,
"What would happen if I'd start dying?"
Nah, I ain't suicidal.
always anxious Sep 2016
i've been joyful for the past 4 months... i haven't even had one sad moment....
but all of a sudden i look back at how my family is torn apart, how i changed so much..
how much weight i gained.. how faded my scars are, and i kinda miss the way i fell....

I would never imagine that i could miss something that bad this much..
Viseract Sep 2016
I wanna raise my voice
Hear my words carried off on stale air
As I gaze all around
I feel the judging stares

SHUT! THE! ****! UP!
Why can't I just be me?
SHUT! THE! ****! UP!
Why is this so hard?

I wanna run, I wanna hide
Can't release what I feel inside
It tears me apart, so slowly
I wanna go, can't stay anymore
Curl into a ball and....

Death marches the streets,
A parade of defeat
Showing off these victims

They all look like me...
******

You drown me in my hatred
Sanity, taken from me, confiscated
Removed without consent
And it gets better yet

GET THE **** OUT OF MY MIND
I don't need you, I'd rather be alone
Leave me to my sorrow, my misery
END! ME!

I scream in complete silence
Subdued by my mind, red with violence
Fingers twitch and bones rattle
Fighting me, is my hardest battle

*And I've not won yet
SassyJ Feb 2016
Is passion a virtue?
A passion that ingests my inside
The bareness exposed emotions
The slow graphic censorship
A depiction of Zion on earth
A deception ranting with wars

Is dedication a virtue?
A definition of a hard felt path
Preserved with heartfelt zeal
An ember that ceases and glows
Triggered touch of perseverance
Till death does you part in parts

Self restraint for one another
Dedicated to fulfil a purpose
Quests of alternative borders
Armoured in armed negations
Negotiations negative dominion
Should we control sensuality?
M Crux Alexander Aug 2015
This rising tide of violence
In the silence of fury
The world getting blurry
Fading voices
Baiting choices
Heartbeats in a hurry
Lost decisions in remission
Still staying the course
I force the temper down
Drowned in smoke
To choke the anger out
This time my mind is
SO LOUD
I find the rhyme helps it to
Fade Out.
I guess it turned out more of a rhyme than a poem.
Sierra Nov 2014
Suicide.

Word *****.

Hypocrite.

Words pour from my mouth
When I learn of the thoughts
Running through his head

I love you
You're worth living
Don't think of suicide

One song
One song 'describing his life'
Triggered my word *****

His turn

Word *****
Pouring form his mouth

I love you
You're beautiful
A lot of fun

One song
Set him off
One song
Turning me into a hypocrite

Realization
Not caring about yourself
Does not mean
You don't care about
The people you love

s.j.d
C Sep 2014
empty black purse
old love notes
all wrinkled
now molding
damp and limp

boat trips and fancy dinners
airplanes and hangers
ocean views and hotels
princess treatment

promises made
one plastic ring
fit
if taped

texted pictures
a portrait
a yacht
videos shared

two months
later invisible
me and my quite room
and an empty refrigerator

let go

empty black purse
wild goose chase
just a distraction
a fantasy

let go
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