Have you ever washed the blood of another off of yourself?

Standing under the shower’s rain,
Rinsing, and scrubbing the blood off your face and arms.
Staining the tile where you stand;
Swirling hypnotically down the drain.

I shot you;
I’m the reason you’re dead,
And the splatter of blood across my face proves it.

The gunpowder is still under my nails,
Black as ever as if I scratched my way out of my own coffin into yours.
I’m still coughing up dirt, I swear.

I stabbed you;
I’m the reason you won’t wake up.

The blade glimmered as I twisted it into you so fluidly.  
I was afraid to pull it out,
Afraid that a piece of myself was embedded in you too.
The dagger is a shade of red and brown as if you were ***** just like me.

I killed you!
Can’t you see? You can’t.
But, I believe, no, I know you feel it somewhere.
Somehow.

This water isn’t hot enough.
It’s not scalding enough to burn the feeling of you off of me.
But the blood,
Oh, the blood.
A never ending crimson sea, a deep bleeding river of you, slowly, but surely, disappearing from existence.

I run a bath,
The shower wasn’t enough.

I’m still stained.
I’m still tainted,
I’m still bleeding into someone who isn’t me.

The water swishes as I settle in.
Back and forth, up and down,
Over and under the sides of the tub.

The water won’t stop turning red,
A deep red.

A reminder that I killed you,
That I shot you,
That I stabbed you.
That I don’t regret it,

But regret isn’t guilt.
Is it?

It’s ******.

My tissue got a scar over all my weary skin,
my tears got not tissues to clear my sin,
bearing all those scars, I've been with none but with myself in war,
I killed myself over and over, those scars now is a shining surface,
I try to hide my face,
Because sometimes I feel disgrace.
I wish I could go back and replace.

What they did to Amy
Wasn't so nice
Cut up by the destroyer's props
Killed, murdered?, by the Royal Navy
They killed poor little Amy
Who was freezing to death
In the cold water
The Thames Estuary is frigid in winter
Poor Amy had to bail out
Her plane was in trouble
Don't worry little lady
The navy will rescue you
Picked up by the Senior Service
Given a tot of *** and a blanket
It was never ever to be
The destroyer hit a sand bank
They tried to free the ship
It was too late for Amy
They spotted the girl in the sea
But revving the ship's engines finished her
Poor Amy was pulled into the props
Cut apart by like fish meat
A sailor saw this happen
He ran to the bridge and shouted
They shouted at him
Get out of Officer's Country
Do not speak to us like that again
Thus died Amy Johnson
Her death covered up by the navy
The government lied to her relatives and public
A British national heroine perished
Her death was preventable
The lies were unwarranted
Someone must be held accountable
I've seen her blue biplane
In the Manchester museum
It's called Jason
I bet it misses dear Amy
Murdered and lost at sea

It was the night she was murdered

The shadows clung tight to the walls

Whispering of evens that left them appalled

Behind the corner the little girl stalls

Knife in her hand makes her feel tall

Taller than mom who lies on the floor

Pools of her blood the carpet absorbs

Mom causing pain has long been ignored

The little girls terrors

Forever no more

i smothered the flame and i
let it strangulate, slowly
i stifled its breath as its
sparks licked at me
like a shrieking victim kicking
and kicking

but the fire was hushed, always;
i would strangle that
brilliant crimson gold
before it roared, before it even dared.

it didnt matter if i
burnt my hands
down to their britle bones;
the fragile self ive built is paper in the wake
of knee-**** fury

What did we do
To deserve this punishment?
We children of the ******

A fate worse than death
Cheated our last breath
We children of the ******

Pain so surreal
Her body will feel
That child that is now dead
The man who killed
Will certainly fulfill
A fate worse than death

An innocent toy
For such a young boy
That child that is now dead
With lungs filled with water
The boy did not falter
A fate worse than death

What did we do
To deserve this punishment?
We children of the ******

A fate worse than death
Cheated our last breath
We children of the ******

I crave to live among the stars
Shed this infected earthly skin
and start dancing on Mars.

Infected with the struggles of the world, the pain and heartache of a earth slowly dying.

We not even trying, We have accepted our sealed fate.

I wish to dance among the stars

I can feel them shedding saddened tears, for a world laced with hate.

I wish to sleep among the serene stars.

An anchor weighs upon my chest
applying pressure above my left breast,
crushing it down to create a concave,
I wave off EMT, there’s nothing left to save.
It was only hope that I’d keep going,
but I truly see no reason why,
I was cursed with the gift of knowing
I could only expect to just get by.
I think I’d rather die.

With a voice just like a symphony
and your hands were my favourite vice,
the gentle way that they held onto me,
thank god your body made them twice.
It was only hope to keep the memory,
as that’s the reason why,
I can look back at the past tenderly,
but sometimes I wish it was a lie.
Maybe it’s just the view of my eye.

Arms like home and lips like heaven
I found a shooting star at eleven-eleven.
But I stopped wishing.
Distanced by the strong will of the walls,
I see you in the streets, pubs and shopping malls.
But I stopped wishing, keep on fishing till life calls.

In a way you did assist
though you do not know it,
as happiness; it killed the poet.
It was only hope that I’d keep growing,
but I can see no reason why,
as soon the clouds will be snowing
when I crave the rain from the sky.
I will settle for the wind that’s blowing
to cover up my disappointed sigh,
if I must be cold I guess it’s best I’m dry.

Now I don’t know what you want from me
or even what you are expecting,
as I don’t know if I’m good enough to deliver
‘cause where I feel a stab I only portray a sliver.
It was only hope that I’d keep flowing
and I’d find a reason why,
the ancient embers continue glowing,
the flames will return and be twice as high.
Making me a firefly.