I peek at you in the crib,
My beautiful babe,
To me born,
An emptiness from me gone.
An Angelic smiling face,
With a lovely grace,
Wrapped in pink lace.
Tiny feet, tiny hands and cute fingers,
On my face linger,
And your soft heart beat,
Pull at my heart strings bit by bit,
Your innocent eyes speak a lot,
So small in every thought.
My love, you and I,
Momma's delight,
A time for a new beginning,
This phase I am enjoying,
My baby girl,
My tiny world.

Hands leaving passionate marks
for a crying nun
that has sinned her life away.
Let her pray instead of running away.
Let her cry warm wasteful tears.
***** fingernails explore
the filthy nuns surface.
Tracing bruises
and spreading pain
from the spanking received
for being too needy.
Forming nuances of red
on the prime target.
Sweet syrup fingers
dripping down the arms
of a freshly dead man.
Defeat for the nun
who now is done.

I want to write something.
I want to feel the words dripping from my fingers
like they are a faucet of poetry.
I want to feel all the similes and metaphors
run through my veins.
I want to write something.

Today it became crystal clear why no one has ever wanted me
I drag so much bagage
and am constantly followed
by demons I gave birth to

In fact some would say
It's a good common sense
to stay as far away from me as possible
Yes, maybe my fingers have the potential to do magic in the light or in the dark, doesn't matter if you are the right one
But is that all you are looking for?
Because, for once I'd rather be the full course than the cold leftover

running notes fast fast
on fingers ran quickly
quickly walked along quickly
and be so quietly and quietly
quietly melody on the nose
slipped and sank into sleep

and there were white papers and will
black paper and torch burn and
notes will run again and all also
it is not known where and when to burn and
quickly run fast then
when I was five years old when I was

when i was six years old
I was seven years old and when I was
exactly eternity eternity one infinite
and when I was not a man but a piano
when I was just the keys and only
white and black black and white and all

02.10.18