Remember this bliss
A state of divine, ingrained in the mind
Euphoria seen in the glimpse of an eye

As a child growing,
time was my loyal companion,
Holidays coming in the perfect moment
Annual Birthdays never failing
Weekends always showing up.
But.
As an adult growing,
time has become an antagonistic companion
Never allowing me
To recover from
The past or
The present.
now there is another year gone
that includes
moments in which
I was drowning in mistakes
and seconds in which
I was floating in euphoria.
I want time to stop
For the ability to process
the gulps of bitter water
or sweet sensation of hovering in joy
as they happen,
Not when the ball drops
and we all scream,
For time has not ceased,
to show the world,
to show us,
to show me,
who is in charge.

I am high on life,
drowning in euphoria,
and drunk on loving.

I drip viscous honey from my lips
Soothing those who are broken

But when does the honey run out?
I feel as if manuka isn't always enough

When the hole inside of someone is all-consuming
When it cannot be filled

When a person fills the void with acrid bitter substances
Chasing the euphoria

We walk through life with honey dripping from our lips

Once, when I was a teenager, I got drunk and high.
I was so crossfaded;
I saw the world in a Viper Room blurred haze.
I remember the people I was with.
My best friend, and some guys from school.
Everything was moving in slow motion,
frame
by frame
by frame.
I saw phantasms of my friends moving from one side of the room to the other,
their ethereal beings following behind them.
The high undulated every few minutes,
becoming so intense I could just see the waves forming before vanishing.
It was the middle of the night.
I had sat down on the couch next to the neighbor boy.
Touching was very intense.
The heat of his skin through his clothes
where our legs and elbows brushed flushed my cheeks amaranth.
I remember feeling euphoric,
perfectly content about where I was and what I was doing.
He laid his head on my shoulder,
falling out of the high like a wounded raven from the sky.
I was so warm.
I remember thinking I could stay on that couch,
letting this altered state of mind befall upon me in perpetuity.
Happy, forever.