Eventually pain became my friend.
An ally I could trust completely.
It would tell me when I was badly wounded.
But this friend became an addiction.
A toxic relationship with no escape.
And when my mind wandered off to other places,
trying to forget everything,
it would drag me back into reality with no mercy.
Scars can only heal if you leave them alone,
but this friend ripped them up every night.
I can’t lie and say it didn’t hurt,
but at least I knew I was still alive.
You mugged my heart in the worst way,
You hurt me more than I ever could myself.
You stabbed me with words,
Leaving me silenced.
You made me beg on my knees,
Humiliating me all over again.
But I still forgive you,
By coming back.
I got played by your lies,
Pursuing me with your intentions.
Tracking down my weakest spot,
Taking advantage of my brand new emotion.
You make me mad for your touch.
But most of all, you make me want to die.
I’ve now stopped caring,
Just like the way you never cared.
You keep coming back with you excuses,
But this time you won’t leave with my heart again.
I slammed the door to my heart shut,
I locked it by carrying on.
The past I’ll never forget,
And the future I’ll never let you ruin.
I still can’t forget the scars you’ve given me,
So I’m regretting never hurting you.
You left me alone all the time,
And now I’m never staying.