“It occurs to me that I really can't remember your face in any precise detail. Only the way you walked away through the tables in the café, your figure, your dress, that I still see.”
And I can’t say it much better than that. Except it wasn’t a dress but, in fact, a cotton tee. Not the tables but the way the streetlight bounced off your jaw. I don’t remember your voice anymore or even the words you gave me. I can only dig my fingers deeply into the body of your laugh.

All fair things are rotten inside
Infused grey bits of debris collide
Graceful wings waltz, their charm has ended
Into a wreckage of all things splendid

I've consumed all of your dark matter
Studying every piece of phantom amber  
In those remnants, I feel a hush
Like echoes from a decanter's rush

At times I do not trust my mind
My thoughts are often mixed with wine
I wonder: "what if I die?"
You tell me: "what if you don't."

"You're mine, you!" whispers in the back of the room. A subtle reminder that I don't think you'll ever leave. You're weird. You're broken. You're everything I am. You're everything I could never be.

When my Dad asks me about my day, or lays out plates like I'm still a little kid. I dream about dull days. Those stupid ruts we couldn't shake. You're mine, you.

It's just the flickering lights. Not your eyes. Not the bitter taste of your white tongue. My ****** gums. The ache of waiting. Of running but never making it. Always looking for the silver lining of your glasses on my nightstand. My crooked nose. Gentle reminders that you'll never leave. Warm and carmine reminders that you will never leave.

My heart should be well-schooled. Because you know I've been fooled in the past. But it's always beating just too late for love to last. "Your hair looks like champagne under this lamp." Do you remember how hard that made you laugh?

That one night we cracked the window, just to let the smoke fly out. I remember thinking "it'll go further than we ever will." As the trumpets began to sing, your bony little fingers started reaching at the stars. It's funny it's not the stars I see, it's always you.

But we'll carry on. We'll carry on. After all, I know there could never be another you.

Only so few times will we
Find ourselves below these leaves
With drunken pleas
Spilling out our
Worn down tongues

Five times now I’ve caught your eyes
Trickling down my spine
Twice I asked you to never leave me
Once you promised to stay

And when it’s over
I think I’ll laugh.

A few steps forward
Crash in the leaves,

Wisps in your hair
Bites on my knees,

Blood on my hips
Your wrists,

My back
Your scratches,

One night
Attaches,

Two souls
A racket,

I fall
You catch it,

My lips
Attacking,

Our bones
Are cracking,

A glimpse
Of him,

In you
I rest my head,

Your collar,
I'm dead.

I sway with your shadow,
taste your sweet air,
cry in the silver light,
and profess I don’t care.

I'm compelled to go back,
For it's cold and damp here
But how can I go?
When I know love is so close, so near.

Pristinely set the table stands
On its waxed floor perfectly glossed
All the chairs are waiting nervously
Their feet tap along

I picked out the ribbon (it's pink!)
Beautiful, but not so flashy
Shiny, but yet so classy

But now the clock is shaking
Your chocolate cake is melting
And all the kids are wailing

Oh how the house is burning
The curtains I am sewing
I can not keep on going

Happy birthday, you
I’m sorry the house is up in flames
I don’t know how to pass the days
I guess I’ll smear cake on your grave.