i saw your message
written in your crimson prose
letters you had written
to let me know
now i know
just how
you loved me so
  
dont say goodbye
dont even close your eyes
dont leave this life
we never said goodbye
one last sigh
and then we say goodbye
  
why do ya hate me
love then forsake me
you kissed then left
me lost and longin
longin for somethin'
somethin' that mattered
now all that's left
is lost
and shattered
  
  
p j upchurch

windows open windows closed
water pours out of the sky from the window
cities are melting around me
I sit quietly all somewhere

windows closed windows open
today is a new year
tomorrow is already the first tomorrow
first time opening new curtains

11.12.18

Somedays I get the urge to just snuggle something
Preferably someone
To be close
To be emotional
To be connected

People aren’t very snuggly
I’m an exception

Since no one else is snuggly
I just have to curl up by myself
And say I want to be alone
When in reality
I crave intimacy

Frightful ******* aching feeling,
Fleetly filling till' it's full,
Soon to smack the central ceiling,
When she pushes, then I will pull,
Pull her right back into my arms,
That is right where she's meant to be,
Metaphorically, so no harm,
Will ever come to her or me,
Avoidance will heal,
Getting closer helps,
Avoidance will hurt,
Getting closer pains,
Duality exists,
And life persists,
Always a good side and a bad side,
And life goes, so live, I insist.

Deep green
Withered screen
Soft skin
Rotting thin
Blessed boy
Restless joy
I cover it
Emotion
Each heartache
Each pain
To feel you again
To understand touch
To remember such
Love me once more
Barriers will fall
We shall collide
Extremeties dissapate
Crooked smiles will align once again

You’re just like a dream
Always so close
Yet so far from me
And I wonder what it feels like
To revolve around your energy

I’ve been here for a while
I’m hanging on for you
But my dear I fear we’re too apart
I want to dive into your heart
And show you
What it feels to fall in love

I try to follow your protocol
But I curse to the wind  
When it all falls apart
Our love is fragile
But not impossible
You’re the cure
To my broken heart
And I’m the console
For your endless tears

I’m love ridden
But I’m far too timid
To let you know
That there’s a world
For you and me
I’ll never get close to your gravity
That’s just the way
It was meant to be