I often fear the idea of being forgotten,
being pushed onto the sidelines, out of sight and out of mind.
I fear that no one will say my name as if it were a song that echoes through my very soul.
And they will not tell the story about how I got the scar on my cheek or the time I nearly drowned in the pool, because I will no longer matter.
I will no longer matter one day- and that scares me.
-o.b

The lonely tear
Upon your cheek
It settles.


F.Z.**N

With bitterness.
I bring myself near your face.
In myself I break
All of  desire for happiness.
Just
Be here.
I keep you in the blue spaces of my thoughts,
Where the raindrops can not reach,
Where sunflowers
Wither in solitude,
Where words break the silence
In countless shards of your touch
And the walls are touching the glass clouds
Where I carve your every breath.
I can not plunge myself in your eyes,
I'm drowning in their depths
Of the colors of oak bark and fruit of the first chestnuts.
Don't ask anything,
Just pour my fingerprints on you
In eternity,
In the sound of lips separation,
In the softness of skin pressed against the cheek.
Feel my suffering
Whispering in your ear.

Although you aren't a big eater, you snack on several unhealthy foods.
2. Your middle name is Andrew.
3. You thought a 'henna' was pronounced 'hyena'.
4. Watermelon flavored gum is your favorite.
5. You are 5,8"
6. You always come to my home games, even when you miss a few important plays.
7. You're #5 usually, but you are  #10 when you wear the maroon jerseys.
8. You know the lyrics to my favorite Taylor Swift song.
9. You are a huge fan of the Jags.
10. When you were 8 years old, your family forgot you to your own birthday dinner.
11. You notice different things I do with my eyeliner.
12. You draw stupid things in Spanish class.
13. Your favorite place to eat is Rib City.
14. You don't ever mind buying me smoothies.
15. You always put your hand on my thigh when we watch scary movies.
16. You remember it was a Friday in which you asked me out.
17. Although you own several t-shirts, you don't own any Florida Gator hoodies.
18. But you call yourself a fan.
19. You weren't impressed with Mockingjay Pt. 1.
20. I cannot stop thinking about you, especially on Saturday nights when I am not with you.
21. We have the same scar on our left hands and our ring fingers.
22. You take pictures of me when I'm not looking, but you delete them when I ask you to.
23. You have never told me I'm stupid, even when I am.
24. You don't like the beach.
25. You always wait for me at the end of class so we can walk together.
26. You remember what color shoes I wear on important days.
27. You don't get mad at me when I miss important parts of your game, as long as I am there.
28. You give me more hugs from behind than you do regular hugs.
29. Kisses on the cheek make you smile.
30. No one has ever been on my mind more than you.

Asking silly questions
About places I no longer live
And people that
Maybe should have stayed friends
Who really burned bridge

Both of us
No innocence here
Who really threw first stone

More questions that don't matter
Naked answers drained of endorphins
Let me be the honey sweet mulled wine
Take me to dinner with your Prada
White girl no *** pearly teeth

Telling me really
'All men are pigs anyways my darling'
Making me her plump little Sunday swine
'Shall I feed at thy trough'
Earns me a red cheek'd slap