It took me sinking to rock bottom, to truly appreciate some of the simple beauty in life that we may sometimes take for granted.
Like a friend who supports you, appreciates you and is there for you in the tough times.
They are the people that make life that little bit easier and that bit more enjoyable. Keep them close and always return the favour.

I used to live a life of color, saturated in love
Every day I'd thank God up above
But all that color has since drained from my veins
And I'll continue on carrying these chains

At first all I could see was the color red
The only feeling I knew was the pain in my head
But now I just live in a world black and white
Hoping that someday I'll defeat this plight

Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever feel again
Sometimes I wish I never did
Life wouldn't seem so bland if I didn't know what color felt like

But I've done some thinking
There's only so far to the bottom when you're sinking
I've already touched the sand
and life doesn't have to be so bland

I've picked up the brush,
now it's time to paint the sky

The cohesive forces that keep my heart afloat are stretched to their limit.
The blood in my veins is so thin the cells separate and I phase through into the cracks of a broken sidewalk.
So tall and sharp are the walls of this crevice.  
No matter how jagged the surface the handholds loosen and crumble to dust in my clenched fists.

They say rock bottom makes for a good foundation upon which to grow.
But the rain that beats down on my head erodes the stone and I fall further than ever before.
I swim to the surface for breath but its late in the year and the rain is cold.
Floating there shivering and shaking, my blood thins again and I slide down into the darkness.
Arms spread sinking deeper and deeper, the air bubbles trapped in the stone release and brush my skin as they speed around the contours of my flesh finding the quickest path to freedom, to happiness.

A few outstretched arms reach down to pull me back into the sun.
My skin is so cold their palms freeze to my body and I pull them down with me a distance.
Eventually they cut themselves free but I took their hands.
I kept a part of them with me on my great descent, it was not my intent.
As I lay on the hard seafloor I can see their feint scorned faces staring at me through the warped wavy surface, grasping their severed limbs.
I'm sorry.

I fell through
the circles of hell
and the further
the more
I fell
the more
fire felt like warmth
struggle felt common
and hell more
like home

and if someday,
some happy day
life grabs you by the collar
and knocks some sense
into your head,
don't think about it
don't fight it.

just remember
that somewhere
in the bottom of a wine glass,
you exist
forever.


-- Eleanor