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Carl D'Souza Jul 25
I never blame myself:
I accept
what has happened
in the past
as Destiny,
over which I have no control.
I focus
on improving my self
in the present-moment
to achieve
the wisdom and virtue
to improve my situation
to increase my joy and happiness.
Emma Howard Jun 10
WIP
Were you a victim?
Were you held captive?
What was the ransom?
How deep was our bond?

Were you in chains?
Forced to be bound to me?
Or is that the way
You want to be seen?
Short verses I’ve been tweaking. WIP.
I feel like I’m at the rock bottom of my life, feeling so worthless and all i do is blaming myself. I feel like I’m insane to hold the pang in my chest, the pressure of this world madness. Drowning in the deep of miserably and despair. Everything seems not in the line, so overwhelmed , and the hatred towards me has been growth. I don’t even know who i am, or where i am.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
- it terrifies me, that i'm getting lost and neither can save me.
This is me now, during mental break down.
When i'm not okay
I hate myself
When i am down
I hate myself
When i have failed
I hate myself
When i can't be what i want to be
I hate myself
When i have so much problems stuck in mind
I hate myself
When i can't shine like everyone
I hate myself
When i hate myself
I hate myself

Nothing's special in me
I can't be like those girls
I can't be like another people
I can't struggle with creative mind
I can't survive the hardest time
I can't solve problems with smartest way
I can't reach the top
I just can see everyone's standing on top
I can't be like this
I can't be like that
And i can't be myself
Nylee Apr 2018
w** is to blame
for the flame that burns me within
my destiny's storm.

who is to blame
when everything remains the same
it is always the constant pain.

who is to blame
surprisingly locked in frame,
I better learn to refrain.

who is to blame
by everyhow the entirety came
apart, nothing left to claim.

what is to be done
when nothing can be undone
so all I have is the blame
.
Brent Kincaid Apr 2018
Hypocritical catastrophe,
Irreverent duplicity,
Luminarial ludiocrity,
Nonsensical impetuosity.

Flippy floppy, slippy sloppy,
Blamey gamey, shame, shame, shame.

Constitutional incongruity,
Jesuitical dictatoriality,
Oxymoronic partiality,
Nepotistic surreality.

Materialistic abnormality,
Monetaristic conviviality ,
Ritualistic mediocrity,
Histrionic philanthropy.

Gotten rotten, misbegotten
Seldom truthful, lie, lie, lie.

Misdirection genuflection,
Malefaction justification,
Incarceration implication,
Resignation profliferation.

Prevarication reiteration,
Damnation indication,
Malefaction direction
Undetected discretion.

Flippy floppy, slippy sloppy,
Blamey gamey, shame, shame, shame.
Gotten rotten, misbegotten
Seldom truthful, lie, lie, lie.
Many years had passed; the woman still worries the loss of the man--
She's still blaming herself; and keeps carrying the pain.
Whatever she wants to forget; she still wondered what she could do and asked herself what is her plan?--
The damage has been done; but why still remain?

She keeps remembering the pain that she have done; she remembered that she's the only reason--
She's the reason why she lost her love; she's the reason why her loved ones were gone.
She's crying again; she's hurt and she thought that she had treason--
Many people told her that she need to forget it and it's not her fault for what had happened; but she still can't move on.
So this is the part two of reminiscence the past, i hope you like it.
They take a step closer to their partner.
Their partner shoves them away.
"Leave me alone, you have only hurt me."
They hold their head in shame and walk away.

At home they hold a gun.
Hand shaking and tears streaming down their face.
They scream, "I DON'T MEAN TO HURT YOU."

BANG

They fall to the floor. With their last breath they spoke these words...

"I am just a person. I loved you but I broke you. I am sorry."

The next day rumors spread that someone killed themself.
Their partner finds out...
They fall to the floor crying.
They whimper and say, "Please forgive me. This is all my fault."
Don't blame yourself for someone else's actions. You have no control over them. You may have been the last person they talked to but that doesn't mean you caused them to do this. It was their choice. They couldn't continue for one reason or another. But know it is not your fault.
Why can't you just be normal?
That doesn't make any sense.
You can't be serious. Your life really isn't that bad.
Okay, well what would you like me to do?
You don't need medication, the doctors are just trying to push it on you to make money.
Okay, well then I'll get counseling.
That costs money too, how are you going to pay for it?
They have free stuff at the college-
Only poor people go there, they won't actually care about talking to you.
Okay.

Why are you mad?
Why are you crying?
Why are you ruining dinner?
What the ****, Ella?
You're not your mom, Ella.
You're so ******* stupid, do you know that?
Huh, do you?
They're just trying to use you.

You're paying, and I'm taking you home.
You're ******* crazy, you know that?*

-E (c) 2017
I shouldn't have told him about my doctor's appointment in a public place. Or am I victim blaming?
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