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Cathy Devan Aug 2021
My mother dresses me in gowns,
stockings, fleece jackets,
She pulls my hair up into a ponytail,
sometimes braids it into conrows,
She spanks my *** when i mess it,
She scolds when my outfit is ***** or greasy,

My father lives in the South side,
He dresses me in a suit and tie,
He likes my hair in a bun,
On the weekends he likes me in sweatpants and a tee-shirt,
***** and greasy in his garage,

I like me having a choice,
I want me on overalls, shorts, jeans and african print on Sundays,
I like my hair messy and short,
I hate the society norms
Feels like the society at large has already made decisions on how to live
LC Mar 2021
a memory wrapped its cold, rough hands
around my throat, squeezing it tightly.
as I tried to walk away, the memory
stuck its foot out, blocking my path.
I could only muster a pitiful squeak
as I fell face first onto the ground,
and the memory fell on top of me,
effectively holding my body hostage.
its hands were still on my throat,
but it was invisible to everyone else.
they only saw me fall to the ground.
they asked me what was wrong,
but I did not have air that could
breathe life into the powerful words
that were begging to leave my mind.
a sheet of paper suddenly appeared
underneath my right palm,
and a pencil rolled my way.
I gripped the sturdy pencil with
every ounce of strength I still had,
steadying the paper with my wrist,
and I wrote the words I couldn't say
so they would stop begging to leave,
even as the memory gripped my throat.
as I kept writing, I noticed the memory
stopped feeling as heavy on my body.
it was getting ****** into the paper.
it resisted at first, but after a while,
the memory slowly let go of me
and relaxed into the pencil marks.
when I had no more words left,
I picked myself up off the ground,
placed the pencil above my ear,
took the paper, hugged it to my chest,
and walked away with a smile on my face.
Bound, bound, bonds
*******
A ***** glance, a frown, a sneer
A hostage
I'm kept, stolen and handed out
Stout beer, a stout bottle of bitter beer
I'm passed over with no doubt
No fear
Kept and praised, so dull over the days
Hostage is now holding down tears
Got in a web, in a puzzling maze
Woods, roads, chase
After something
Something else
A circling race
Fearful
Doubtless
Meaningful
Meaningless
Kept, stolen
And handed out
Again and again
Bonds
(please read into it whatever you want, it's just a (kinda) rhymed flow of consciousness.)
Amanda Kay Burke Nov 2020
The soul is something to nurture
To be touched with gentle hands
Will only blossom when cared for
By someone who understands

And your eyes feel like a dagger
Piercing through my skin
Puncturing vulnerable parts
Hidden deep within

Once full of serenity and strength
My body now lies hollow
An ocean of potential dried up
Empty pit where demons wallow

Drawing me in against my will
Like a fish caught on a line
Powerless to escape the hook
Captivity hard to define

Freedom drowned in a sea of regret
Pulled by the tide's direction
Swept up in the undertow
Waves crash and silence objection

Reasons remain a mystery
My heart caged without knowing why
Held hostage by past transgressions
Imprisoned by forces too great to defy
I kinda drifted way from the original meaning with this one
Ruheen Mar 2020
We're held
Hostage
In our own homes
In our own minds
And then we run
Thinking we're free
But that's just
A dream.
A hostage
I lost it,
And I don't know
How to fix it.
I just want to
Go to
Sleep
And never wake up.
I wrote a story, for my English class. Didn't think I'd like it. But then I read the last line. Still don't love it. I don't know why. But I'm getting there.
Same with this poem. Didn't like it until I wrote the last line.
Ashlyn Yoshida Mar 2020
Twisting and turning
the stems are snapping
My mind can't take this wait
---
Burning and simmering
the petals make a tea
I don't want to drink your poison anymore
---
Listening
---
Waiting
---
Why won't someone save me?
I'm alone in this world
tied to a chair
---
no one is ever here.
JDom Feb 2020
Thoughts racing, thinking of escaping
Am I trapped? Have I been confined to live in this place of regret?
This is all my fault, placed here through my actions, never to feel again the grace of satisfaction
Death appears to be the only light, it feels like there’s no reasons left to fight

A hostage to my own mentality, an everlasting insanity
There is no breaking free the chains of subconscious slavery

Consumed by the thoughts in my head, nothing makes sense but the voices want me dead
Constricted by the walls of my mind, telling me to leave this all behind.
Oh how I crave such a shallow grave; bring me to my final resting place

Death holds a constant grip on me

My head forever held in shame, forget my face, forget my name
Disintegrate all feelings once felt, pandemonium is where i’m left to dwelt
Beating hearts never felt so cold, living within this hell all alone
Ceasing to exist is all I’ve ever known
Calloused, broken, bruised and bleeding
My inner compass has lost its true north, always contemplating back and forth
Standing on the fringes of existence, pushed from the edge of my subsistence

A hostage to my own mentality, an everlasting insanity
There is no breaking free the chains of subconscious slavery

Unworthy to call this body a home; this prison of mere flesh and bone
I have become darkness incarnate, a true form of the blackest abyss
Deliver me from dissolution, no absolution from my own retribution

This mortal vessel has run it’s course, completely depleting my vital life force
Nothing can save me from myself, my own worst enemy, my soul forgotten like an unread book on the shelf

A hostage to my own mentality, an everlasting insanity
There is no breaking free the chains of subconscious slavery

With every notion of devotion I beg and plead to thee, please release me from this grim reality
Carlo C Gomez Dec 2019
The ransom note came this morning
And you were listed twice
First as the abductee
Then as the abductor
I'm not even going to ask
How it was that you captured yourself
I just want to know
What's going to happen once
You have the money
Do you free or ****
The hostage?
Blixy Nov 2019
Anxiety you used me.

You held me as a prisoner in my head.
You held me hostage.
You made me treat my friends awful so I’ve got nobody now.
You dragged me around making me feel worthless.

You made my life a living hell and I assumed that if pretended everything was fine for long enough then maybe....just maybe I would begin to believe it.

But It’s getting to the point where I don't even like what I see in the mirror.

All I see is a ghost staring back at me with empty eyes.
All I see is the hurt in my smile.
All I see is the mess I am.

I am a problem that can’t be fixed.
I am what’s wrong.

And I will always be what's wrong...
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