[Alright, I don’t know how else to say this, but...
You know Unsafe?
I only made 3 parts.
I keep getting wind that there’s a part 4.
I’m starting to think that SHE continued it somehow.
How she did is beyond me, considering she isn’t exactly real.

Oh yeah.

       You might want a little clarity as to whom i am referring to.

Alright. so, the series X is written about a mystery girl that is called (or rather represented as) X, no?

Well, the reason she’s called that is because nobody knows her name.

I never gave her one.

Getting back on topic, it’s supposed to be written by another fictional person, whom for the sake of continuity, we will call W. Now, W and X were in love, very much so. W is offed, X mourns, yadda yadda yadda, et cetera, et cetera. Well, I felt that in order to give X more clarity and depth, that i’d have to write a second series, One that is written in the perspective of X. This premise became what you now know as Unsafe.

But, for some reason...

As I continued writing Unsafe, it felt more and more like I wasn’t even writing.

It’s like she had extended into my subconsious, from the fictional world in which she dwells, and into my pen.

Luckily, she’s easy to identify. I write her in ‘a special way’ as opposed to my [normal] writing.

Wait.









Alright, Don’t be alarmed, but She MIGHT (this is a big might) have escaped the domain I made for her,

Unsafe,

And into my Notes.

I cannot tell if it’s true or not, as this notice is considered it’s own poem. I cannot interact with my Notes until I decide to leave any poem that I am currently in.

But more importantly, this also implies that she is SENTIENT, and no longer needs me to convey her thoughts and actions.
Hell, she might be fighting for control over my account as I write this!

Ahahaha...

I really ******* myself over, huh?

Anyways, if you see her, tell me IMMEDIATELY! Just whatever you do, DON’T interact with her! In her current state, she is most likely extremely hostile.
I do appreciate you reading X and Unsafe, but this is getting a liiiiitle serious here, so uh...

Please take caution! I couldn’t live with myself if one of my readers LITERALLY GOT KILLED OFF by one of my works.

I’ll update you guys if anything meaningful happens.

In the meantime, I think I’ll go somewhere...

Familiar.]

Sometimes
I feel unsafe with you

I am reduced to being
A child by you

I become a victim
Of the bully in you

Sometimes
I feel unsafe
With you

Sometimes
I don't know what to do

I don't know what to say
Or where to go

So I run for the safety
Of a quiet place

Knowing you curse
My latest escape

My chest aches
From the weight of you

The grip and grind
Of the beast in you

By the karmic scrape
Of the venom you spew

Sometimes
I feel unsafe with you

You used to be a safe haven
A place to nestle against your warmth and love.
Before you turned craven,
And rejected everything I offered with a brusque shove.

You are now my unsafe haven
Every word you speak you twist and tangle
Your meaning like the feathers of a raven
And the sweet memories are now seen from a different angle

Look what you have lost my darling!
My love, my trust, my admiration.
Every time we speak my inner animal is snarling.
Gnashing at the veneer draped thinly over your oration.

The instinct to fight, and the instinct to surrender to your lies collide
One animal baring teeth and readying for our witty battle
The other slinking toward you, her will to hurt you died.
But behind every sweet word I hear the deceit rattle.

You play the game like no one I have ever known
A true master, an ace at pleasures of the now
But I no longer wish to play, all the cards I have I've shown
So keep your prize, I no longer want your broken vow.

You are full of danger and desire
Of pain and hate and lies
I truly don't think you want to be a liar
But in the end it is always me who tries.

I regret everything.
I regret falling in love.
I regret leaving.
I regret opening up.
I regret hurting so many.
I regret being desperate.
I regret changing.
I regret running away.
I regret staying.
I regret turning away.
I regret meaning everything.
I regret feeling unsafe.
I regret playing games.
I regret loving.
I regret caring.
I regret it all.

Bang! Bang!
The sounds of gun shots mid-day on Thursday,
Sirens getting closer to the crime scene,
Just two weeks ago a man's life was terminated for a cellphone,
More thugs and more gun fires,
the tragedy so bad it even appeared in the news.

But today i can feel fear creeping in my vains,
Another man shot dead today,
why do i have to live in this community?
For i am afraid.
Few months ago
it was just like an action movie,
people running and rolling
while the loud sounds from the police guns aiming over my
roof top kept on going
Bang! Bang!

I see the police patroling the streets by day,
having picnics in the park
while they watch their horses eroid away the soil.
They feast to some take away outlets
filling their sagging bellies by night.
While they letting the just go unpunished all year long,

Oh! It hurts.
I feel a bullet on my chest,
Oh! It hurts
for i cannot look through the dark
night anymore.
I sit on the side of this wide classroom window,
And i wonder,
What if one bullet comes straight to me. (God forbid)

Oh this township that i loved,
you are not safe anymore.
Where can i run to for i called you home?
There is no distance further gone  without any loud sounds;
Bang! Bang!

     Oh mam' ngiyalil'
     ngililel' labo abangasek'
     ikakhulukaz' imphil' yam'
     umphefumul' ongenacal'
     kungab' sewabayin' wena             dolobh' lami.

I called your name,
with so much pride and bragging,
but now i cannot even say your name
for you have groomed thugs,
gangsters,
vindals,
drug addicts and drug dealers,
harlots... And what else that we do not know?

Could it be blood sacrificies,
are these the 'EndTimes' proclaimed in the book of Revelations,
Why should i bother trying to think when all i hear in my head are ecoing sounds
Bang! Bang!

All i need to do  is to find a way out,
    Nyawozam' ngibeleth' !
    Ngob' inhliziy' ayisahlalisekang'
    qobo
when will that day be,
when crime will be stopped for good,
and police do justice to the community?

They said
Don’t wear leggings
Or a shirt that shows your cleavage
Because you need to be covered up
You’re a distraction

They said
Don’t use your period as an excuse
For male teachers to let you go to the bathroom
Because you’re not fooling anybody

They said
Don’t shave your head
Boys can
You can’t and don’t
And won’t because we’ll suspend you

They said
Watch the length of your skirt
The colour of your hair
The shoes and makeup
The piercings
And they call that fair

They said
Come to us if something is wrong
if you’re feeling bullied
if you feel unsafe
I guess they don’t remember asking my friend and I
if we heard of anyone in our year with suicidal tendencies
They asked us because
We were the sensible ones
The bright ones
We couldn't have been depressed.
I guess they didn’t see my panic
and my hand squeezing my wrist.


Because school
Is not a place
Where you can express who you are
School is not the place where you feel safe
It's a battle ground on the outside of your comfort zone.

School isn’t about education
Its a challenge, competition
Its a measurement of your capabilities  

But what if you don't excel?
You’re called out for not being good enough
You're humiliated. Mocked.

You get looked down on
Judged
Embarrassed
And you don’t get your
Degree

As if a degree explains who you are
What you’ve been through
How much you’re worth

As if a degree
Measures the capacity
Of your heart
And your knowledge

And a teacher can share your grade
Make a joke and smirk
Cause they think you’re not worth it

And they can laugh and yell and call your parents
Who don’t think you’re any better.

Because year after year they’ve been led to believe
that you’re easily distracted
that you don’t do what you’re told
that you’re rebellious

Because even if you showed respect to the hypocrisy
That you can't help but notice,
They still won’t understand that you're just fighting
for what you believe is right, for mutual respect.

Because that’s not what you were thought.
You were thought to raise your hand when you want to speak.
And even if you made a valid point
You would still get lectured on putting your hand up when you want to speak.
Discipline put first.

**And that is my definition of school

LGBT.
You may have never heard of this acronym before,
Or maybe you associate it with liberals, or Obama,
Or hippies.
LGBT stands for:
Lesbian:
I was approached by a straight man
At a gay bar, who asked me if
I wanted to 'have a good time'.
I told him no.
I could see something in his eyes
Flicker, and he asked me why
I told him I only liked women
In that regard
He stood up angrily,
And told me that I was an
Ugly dke anyway.

LGBT stands for
Gay:
I was holding hands with
My boyfriend while
We were walking in the park.
We watched an older woman
Walk up to us and say,
"You're going to hell."
I said, "I'll see you there,"
She glared at me before
Storming off in a rage,
mumbling, "Disgusting fg."
On her way.

LGBT stands for
Bisexual:
I came out to my family today.
My cousin said,
"You're just confused."
My father said,
"Don't you dare walk in
My house with a f*ggot."
My mother said,
"Pick a side."
My supposed "friends" said,
"You're just desperate and greedy."
I've been dating an amazing person
That I can never share if I want to
Stay on good terms with "family".

LGBT stands for
Transgender:
I binded my chest today
With Ace bandages even though
I know it's extremely unsafe
Because I didn't want to be
Seen as a girl again.
I finally cut my own hair
And when I told my mom why
She told me,
"Leave before your father gets home."
I am sleeping on my friend's couch tonight
Because my parents couldn't accept me
As their son.

You might associate the acronym LGBT
With liberals.
Liberals that don't use their religion as an
Excuse when they're really just scared.
Or Obama who said, "No one in America
Should be scared to walk down the street
Holding the hand of the person they love."
Or hippies who refuse to conform to
Heteronormativity, because it only matters
That you love, the who or when or where or why or
How
Doesn't matter nearly as much.
People are more than their secondary ***
Characteristics.
"Love thy neighbor as thyself", right?

I want to live in a world
where I can be proud
of my body
And not fear that I’m a 12, not a 2
and accept myself.

I want to live in a world
where men are valued
on television
And women are not always supreme
in their tiny dresses.

I want to live in a world
where I do not have to fear
for my saftey
And not have to tell a friend I’m going
for a walk.

I want to live in a world
where I can walk home alone
at night
And not have every creak, every thud
set me on edge.

I want to live in a world
where gender equality
is real
And is not split through medial portrayal
and unsafe reality.

So lets get this straight:
An armed, white man walks into a school,
kills 17 students and teachers with a tool
that can be bought at just any store
by a 19 year old, insane, fool,
before being caught, all on Valentine's day,
Marking the 30th mass shooting just this year
And it's not time to talk about gun control?

If they had been black, you'd say "more police"
If they had been Mexican, you'd say "build a wall"
If they had been Middle-Eastern, you'd say "travel ban"
But they're not, they're white, they're mentally ill,
so "Report the disturbed" our president says
"It's about mental health!" our congress says
"But it's not time to talk about gun control"

You send your thoughts and prayers,
while we're pleading for your help
You want to know my thoughts and prayers?
I thought our country cared about us
I thought our country loved us more than guns
And I pray that my school won't be next
That my friends won't be mourned on the internet
That we might be safe in our unsafe unchanging world
Because you won't talk about gun control

But you know what?

***** you if you think that's all we're gonna do
We're taking this horse by the reigns
Knock some sense into that old brain
We're organizing, rising up and wising up
Taking a stand, and taking a walk
Making our voices heard, better watch for that 10 o' clock
We will not be complacent in our friends' deaths
We've done it before and we will do it again
They say "when we're older"
I say "why wait till then"
These laws are going to change now
These deaths have got to be dwindling down
Everyone knows kids can be one loud crowd
And no, we won't calm down
Until no one ignores our outraged sound
We will make the politicians come around
And finally, gun control will bring peace to our towns

And finally, me, my family, and my friends, can feel safe, with long lives ahead,
and we can go back to school together again.