In process of knowing who I am!
In process of recalling my memories!
I found an empty space!
A space I can’t remember!
A space I struggle to belong to!
A space I questioned my belongings in this world!
A space I realized I’m forgotten!

14-10-2018

I found those papers in my drawers!
Knowing my own words, would make it easy to feel their belonging to me!
Tried to paint the landscape I dreamt of…
Tried to place my hope of joy and peace in its corner…
I can’t find my true color…
I can’t find the details that speaks me…
I realized I have  a picture of my world painted by others colors…
I realized I don’t own that painting

23-10-2018

I saw it in me! I saw it in my silence! I saw it in my dream!
I saw every minute telling me to leave!
I have to leave! But where to? That I didn’t know!
Just walk away…walk and other things will fall into its places! Don’t be afraid!
Don’t be scared!
Don’t be skeptical!
Don’t wait for that thing to happen!
Don’t wait for that change, that you are longing for!
Don’t wait to be a stranger again!
It is just a label! You are a stranger even in your enoughness…
In your fullness…
In your wholebeing…
Just take that Leave…and be …
The Leave!

Grateful!
I’m grateful to those who are not grateful to me…
I’m grateful to my insanity for keeping me sane…
I’m grateful to my dark side of me, for letting me know where I can find the light…
I’m grateful to those silent, painful moment for letting me find the hope in those strange moments…
I’m grateful to undisclosed craziness in finding balance in unknown moments…

A day is marked under my name saying, “it is Your Birthday”?
And  
“I Forgot!”
I forgot to count!
I forgot to enjoy!
I forgot to have fun!
Papers are fading away! Withering like leaves in the air
I refrain myself from writing…
I refrain my words to go out of my throat!
I can’t stop what inside me!
I can’t stand still from knowing why!
I can’t understand my silence anymore!

Maybe years passed by you with no hope in the horizon!

Maybe hours wasted in things you didn't feel them!

Maybe breathes sneaked away without feeling where they went!

Then that unplanned minute happens when your eyes touch that person while he is in front of you projecting that peace that you were fighting for!

When your heart gives that beat, were you straying for ages to know you are alive!

Then...

That is the moment when you realise that you reached one of your Meaningful Beat in your life!

When you are blessed enough to someone

Being with you is a bless given by God!

Listening to your soul is a remedy for a tired soul!

Reading every single word from you like reciting a mantra of pure love among Angels!

A radical bond created beyond people terms and norms!

Silly...Funny...lightness...spontaneous...are the core of our moments!

Downs are met with faith...
Ups are felt with appreciation...

With all of that, a happy 1 paper anniversary, is not but a long life journey filled with amazing moments!

With that I face any moment even if it is painful, with joy and hope!

Thank you for the light you bring to us!