You made a fool out of me
Or did I do it to myself?
We both played around
For a while, we called it love

Now I am walking through the city
Trying to catch emotions again
It’s hard to like someone
So dressing up is surely in vain

I’m spinning around my room
Dancing to the music in my head
Who knew, love and hate
Good and sin, all go with red?

I’m still thinking of where
I went wrong -made you walk away
Must have been the way I adored you
Could’ve been something you said

Yet how foolish are we?
Trying to find love in our fights
Holding on to each other’s hands
Letting go whenever the picture gets a little less bright

Come sit with me,
Tell me you've seen my struggle,
Show me you're proud of me,
Your empathy is what I seek,

I'm sorry you have to be here,
And that it has to be this way,
I know high expections,
Often ,from reality, leave us astray,

A few hours from your clock,
And you asking me to be more responsible,
This is all I need from you,
Even if the sun shines and the sky is blue,

I know you're looking out for me,
But I'm not looking for you,
I may be here wanting your attention,
Oh, but there is no compassion,

I've seen you making the effort,
And hopelessly trying,
Always righting my wrong,
But one day you'll too, be gone

Isn't that what always happens?
We care, we love, we break,
Isn't everything too sudden?
Scathing us for our own sake?

So why does it matter if I don't love?
Live by myself, indifferent to my pain,
For aching, our heart is never too young,
So why you say happy ones are the only saints?

Is it okay?
If I sit in the corner of the room
And let myself suffer
While you shine out there
In your spotlight

Is it okay?
If everything that comes aroud
Leaves me scared and drowning
While you put yourself out there
With such decency

Is it okay?
If I refuse to speak
If I refuse to answer
While you climb the ladder
Taking you where you belong

Is it okay?
If I am unable to do what I should
If I fail everytime I try
While you fight your battles
Making it look so easy

Is it okay?**
If I am not like you
If I am not like ANY of you
While you're like the rest of them
Self-assured,
Bold,
Able to do as you're told?

Bad things happen, but good things happen too,
Cruel to me -but always good for you

Nobody knows what happens every night,
A girl slit her wrists -when others are not in sight

I'll forever be hiding my scars,
You only hurt me -right from the start

What does it take to just not be sad?
I'm not asking for happiness -please now, don't be mad

Sometimes I wonder if I'm asking for too much?
When I'm asking for peace -there's no thing as such?

Send me postcards if you can,
We can spend our days without a plan

Let's abandon what we should,
Run through narrow streets in Italy, if you could?

When you weep, I'll be here –I'll make you smile
You make my life, worth a while

I long to meet strangers with you,
Some old man having his coffee –in blue

So when it ends, you'll have something to remember
Because I won't be here after December

We know –life is anything but fair,
These memories will keep you sound –in case you're scared

I'm giving you this year, so say your goodbye,
But once I'm gone, please don't cry

She has friends
A lot of friends
Yet she feels alone

She knows them
But they don't know her
Not any of them


Its such a despair -
A tragedy I plead
The one who has loved
Is always neglected indeed

how do u get rid of the shadow above your head
the constant sorrow
the imaginary rope around your neck


struggle to let go of things latched on you
the mismatched
consequences you weren't heading to

this sweet desperation
this inevitable struggle
im looking for myself everyday
with disgrace
in every face

like a wildfire
its spreading in my soul
the darkness and the glitter
the good and the evil

im standing right here
looking down this road
threw my heart in the ocean
it made me weary and old

they believe what they're told
dont bother to look
behind the curtain
where the tenderness folds
the screams get so loud
it makes you cold

Out of my little cage
Through the tall grass
My bare feet
Stepping into the wild woods

My skin aglow
Touched by the essence
Of the echoing howl
The rustling, abandoned leaves
Oh, the silenced trees

Amidst the wilderness
Swayed the blissful ecstasy
And as I touched, I snuffed
Rushing though my veins
As if my blood had no value
Ever

A wallflower, many wallflowers
My body off the ground
Heart out of chest
Oh, the delectation, the zest

I am the entity you want to feel,
The perplexity you want to disclose,

You are the denouement to my intricacies,
The only emotion to my empty days

Amazing —isn't it amazing when you realise you don't need anyone to be happy? When you stop depending on people or things to bring you joy –when you stop waiting for anyone or anything at all to make you feel complete? It finally stops bothering you if anyone is paying attention to how scarred you are or if anyone is ignoring the tiny details you're giving them -those subtle cries for help..
It's important. It really is. Just like we need oxygen. We need that. That kind of assurance, that self-confidence –that kind of knowing that even if you fall, if you fail, if you're pulled down —you still have you. Even if nothing else, but you -being you.

Those eyes
Those ****** eyes
As much as I hate to admit
They give me butterflies

If I could
I would want you to stop existing
I am feeling all these emotions
But I swear I'm resisting

You're not even the last thing I want
Not someone I would trust
I have to stop thinking
I know that I must

Isn't it crazy?
To fall for someone who looks like a heartbreak
But you make me want you
My mind goes numb, my hands shake

I guess it's okay
To think about you sometimes
Just to make myself satisfied
I tell my heart all these lies

I can see it in your eyes
The wilderness speaking for itself
The assurance that you can get anything
Like a game, without any help

I really want you to know
Not everyone is easy to buy
I don't care how pretty you are
If behind my smile, you can't hear me cry

You're fire –a beautiful fire
And I'm not ready to burn
I am more than what you see
But I notice, it's none of your concern

Lying down in just a T-shirt
I can only hear myself breathe
In and out
In and out
Why did you always shout?

I swear I'm trying my best
It's been months since I've shed a tear
But tonight, I dry my eyes
Close my eyes
Sick of all your lies

These four walls witness my sobs
I don't want to keep it in anymore
I'm breaking down
Torn down
There's only silence, no sound

My mind goes numb when they say your name
My heart pounds, I can't breathe
Flying away,
I'm flying away
I can't feel my body –as I lay

Here you are, still won't admit your mistakes
My God! My hope fractures
No gravity
There's no gravity
I'm hanging in between —you and me