It still hurts..
How do you forget
the thing that crushed your heart?
The pain is still there,
haunting me.
It goes away,
but it always come back.

and it still hurts the same way it hurt before

Bakit nga ba kailangan magplano?
kailangan isipin ang kinabukasan
problemahin ang mga susunod na araw

Bakit kailangan tayong pahirapan?
kung mga bagay na naisip mo para sa hinaharap
ay pwedeng magbago at maglaho na lamang
  
Bakit hindi na lang gawing simple ang buhay?
kung san walang hinanakit at paligsahan
at tanging saya ang nararamdaman

Hwag ng magisip
palayain ang mga sarili
sa problemang walang humpay
tara't sumabay na lang sa agos ng buhay

crush kita, alam mo ba?
mapansin mo naman sana
gusto kitang yakapin
ayoko lang aminin

pasulpot sulpot ka lang
pagkausap ka laging ang oras ay kulang
pero sa bawat minuto ako'y nalilibang
hindi mo lang alam malapit ng mabuang

unang kita ako'y natulala
naglakas loob na ika'y makilala
minsan lang naging sigurado
sa desisyon kong to

buhok mo'y nakakabighani
mata mo'y napakabayani
ilong mo'y nakakaaning
ngiti mo'y parang bituing nagniningning

puso ko'y parang sasabog
pag ang fb chat ko'y tumunog
ako'y nanghihinayang
sa picture nating nasayang

isa lang ang gusto ko
ang masabi sayo lahat to

The noise inside my head
doesn't seem to have an end
the words that hurt,
the feeling of neglect.
slowly kills me.

Everyday I live in my mind
the sounds of the world i couldn't find
overthinking, overthinking..
still thinking..
until a teardrop falls.

Every heart beat that aches
is so hard to fake
The longer it takes, the more painful it becomes
the quieter it is,
the more sensitive you are to pain.

When our lips touched
My world stopped
Just like how I felt
With the other guy who left

These lips that tasted joy and pain
These lips that tasted tears and flames
These lips marks the beginning
Yet it always ends in nothing

When our lips touched
I was ready, I was ready to fall in love
Even if it's a one-sided affection
Even if it's another rejection

I'd take risks.
Always.

I don't trust you even if I do love you
You always say everything will be okay
Even if you say the most touching words in the world I won't believe you
Coz whatever point of view I may look, only lies will portray

I respect you coz you are the superior
But I’m mad at you coz you’re taking advantage of it
You tell this, you tell that, you all got the power
But in my mind I know all of those words you utter are full of ****

I don’t want to listen to you anymore
Or even hear your voice asking how am I doing
I’m glad that you’re far away from home
I’m mad coz I know you’re happy flirting

I know these words of mine is very impolite
But I can’t hide it anymore
I would like to thank you for still being there
And say ******* for still hurting my mom more and more

Last day today
Saying goodbye won't be easy
how much time will I need to sacrifice
to be with you again

tomorrow will be a cold day
and December won't be lovely
without you here by my side
..until we meet again

I don't know.
It feels so weird.
Where I am, is so familiar
yet it surprise me every time

Love is just so chaotic.
It's so strong, confusing and stubborn.

Even when I'm always occupied,
busy and got a lot of things in mind
I have this feeling I just can't deny

Paperworks, storyboards, concept designs - job orders
there's still space in my head that keeps me thinking
of how soft your face, lips, and whisper

How my world turned upside down when you came
sigh love is in the air
that I don't care if I get lost and insane

Just to be in a place full of love
where everyday of my life I feel special
and from then on I feel like I'm floating above

Distance.. doesn't stop me from loving you
nor breaks me apart when I'm longing
I just miss you..

I miss you so bad.. :(

adored you in just a blink of an eye
no hesitations of getting to know you

admires your smile just like a flying butterfly
no imitations can take away the smile off of you

Seeing you stops the world I'm living
laughing with you seems like I'm in paradise
joking around makes the world go round
liking you and liking me back is just the perfect feeling

attached with your sense of humor
no comparisons can be made

appreciates the simple things you do
no decisions of keeping you out of my head

Happiness is when
you walk differently
it's when
the weather doesn't matter;
rainy, sunny, gloomy - it still doesn't matter
it's when
even sad songs make you smile.

Gusto kita, ilang ulit ko ng binigkas
ang mga salitang paulit ulit sa isipan ko
tuwing umaga sa pagdilat ng aking mga mata,
tuwing sasapit ang gabi kayakap ang unan habang iniisip ka

Pinipilit itali at ikulong itong pakiramdam
Na walang ulit ang pagsabog pero pahapyaw lang.
Dahan dahan lang sabi ng puso
pero pag hindi na ginamitan ng utak
ito’y bigla na lamang titibok ng walang humpay
at sa pagtibok nito kasabay ang pagbigkas ulit sayo - gusto kita. Sobra.

Ang dami kong tanong, araw araw ako nagtatanong,
nagiisip ng bakit, pano, ano?
Ano ba talagang tama ko sayo?
Pogi ka pero di naman ako mahilig sa pogi.
Pangit ba ko, anong mali sakin bakit hindi ko makuha
ang iyong pagibig?

Hindi ba may mga bagay naman na ayaw natin
nung una pero nagugustuhan din sa huli.
Ako kaya? Kelan yung oras na ako naman yung gustuhin mo.
Gusto ko na malaman, ibigay mo na sakin kasi nababaliw na ko.

love isn't really a game
but i played it and I enjoyed it
I felt the happiness and he felt the same
I fell inlove, I admit
Everyday we're both in flame

He loves me so much
and I love him back
He misses me so very much
and I smiled back
love is in the air but there isn't much

The game was over because love became real
then I was surrounded by fear
Saying 'I love you' is the same as not feeling like eating a meal
I can't do anything, just burst into tears
I can't even understand my feelings, for real

Love became lame
and I started asking questions
I felt pity and also shame
I broke his heart like he was fired by a cannon
I've hurt him then suddenly I felt the heavy rain

I cried and I've been hurt with the same reason
I didn't learn from my mistakes
I've brought him so much pain just like drinking a poison
We've both end up having heartaches
coz love, I thought at first was a game.

faith faith give me faith..

She always let her down
she always lose hope
she always wear a mask

it isn't that easy
it isn't just one snap away

it's hard
she makes it hard for herself
she lets herself drown
so down..

fear surrounds me..

JUST FEAR
ONLY FEAR
**** FEAR

The last time we cut connection,
It hurt, it hurt like hell
like my heart turned blue
and all I tasted was the salty tears
like my world was crushed
and I was lost for a moment

The next few days, I woke up like a diff person,
no name, no identity, just a lost stranger.
the next few weeks, I couldn't even remember a thing,
my mind was empty, I lost the memories.
The next few months, I remembered, I reminisced, I felt, I forgave, but I kept moving on

There are times you'll mess up and go back
to the feeling that your heart once knew
I went back, I messed up a little
but I never want to stay like that
There's no day, I don't miss and think of you
but I'm still moving forward.

As I read our old convos and read the word "babe", uttering it loudly felt strange.
As if I haven't gotten used to it when we were together. It felt like forever.

It's been 16 months now since we parted ways.
I wonder how long will I get used to the days
of not thinking of you nor dreaming of you.

I hope that's the last stage i have to endure to forget.

If I could just go back in time
where sweet smiles are revealing our face
where laughter and sweet moments are surrounding the entire space
where nobody but our silhouettes walking across the road of existence.


If I could just rewind and start over again
where I'm free to hold your hand
where I'm free to wrap my arms around you
where we can count years together


I could've made those times perfect
I should have made the best I could to make the smile last

it breaks my heart whenever I hear your name
it doubles my heart beat whenever I see unexpected messages from someone else
it makes me sick whenever I think of those perfect times with you

it gives me a hard time deleting all of your messages in my inbox
it brings sadness to my face whenever I see the pictures from the past
it annoys me whenever my phone beeps assuming it's you only to find out it's someone else

it irritates me because I can't learn from my lessons
it leaves questions in my mind that I really can't find answers
it bothers me everyday.. Why do these things always happen to me?

It's already dawn but my eyes won't close
Waiting for the reason of this unsleepy eyes of mine
I keep thinking about the message that hurt me like the thorns of rose
It's really painful, I can't pretend that I'm happy and fine

Mr. Negative keeps knocking on the other side of my mind
Telling me lots of negative ****
The other side of me is asking so many Why's and signs
I hope this is not real I hope it's just a myth

I don't know what to feel
If I should feel the anger or sadness or don't feel anything at all
I don't know what to think
It's like guessing which way to go inside a maze

One thing I learned today
That even if you're so happy
A word can break you and hurts you like sting rays
A summer's day can turn into a cold freezing night in may

If this will end soon
I don't know what will happen
I wouldn't just think of 'Ifs' and be calm in my room
Listen to songs and write poems and wait until the end

I want to talk about us,
how we stared at each other's eyes when we first met,
how my cheek touched your cheek when we first said hi,
how we fell in love on August,
in our feet leaving footprints
in the sand, and
with the morning sun rays touching our pale skin.

I want to go back
to how we felt the fire and ice
clashing through the distance
that separated us for 2 years ,
and how we both fought to break it.

I want to remember all our plans
our tours around the world,
our household chores when we live in together,
our wedding plan,
our future family.

I want to know..
how we ended up like this,
how we ended up crushing each other's heart,
how we became each other's nightmares.

I want to talk about us
but i dont know how to start
because there's no us anymore.

And i'm so tired of this cycle
being lovely and ****
is what they're good at
they're all the same
and then when you start to get insane
they will start to distance themselves

and in the end, you lose.

I wonder what you're up to now
Same as what im doing - sleeping
Or doing the opposite

I wonder how your love story went, is going and would be,
If life got ******* you or
You're enjoying it at its best

I wonder if you ever thought
Of someone out there
Across the world,
Beyond your eyes that can see,
Thinking and waiting for you too.

You just have to remember that

People come and go
Some people care, some people don't give a ****
Some are kind, some are pretentious angels
Some likes you, some just wants to use you
Some are serious, some just wants to play

Go on, have fun.

All you gotta do is remember.

Slowly waking up to reality..

I don't know if it's good or bad
My brain smells freedom
My heart feels the pain.

Today.. I remembered you again.
I have been questioning myself
if that was love that I felt with you,
now as my tears fall down,
I felt the pain
and I could say
I loved you dearly.

It's something that is hard to get rid of
You can smile, laugh, daydream, be positive
but you can't just ignore it.

Sometimes you need to feel it.

I don't need no ******* man
I know my self-worth
And they should need me

I shouldn't look
but be found
I shouldn't chase
but be pursued
I shouldn't be taken advantage of
but be taken care of

I don't need no ******* man, all I need is me.
A better me everyday

How do you learn from the things that only repeats
when you're just being yourself and acts as it is

When love hits me, I fall hard
as hard as how a comet falls from the ground
I understand, I wait, I forgive even if its hard
as long as there's abounding love around
























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