Please, please baby.

Stay where you are.

I haven't seen her this happy in a long time.

Your mother to be.

She's been fighting for months and months.

Watching that stick for minutes that don't seem to end.

Crying her eyes out when that strip doesn't appear.

I''ve seen pieces of her die as she's lost others before you.

So I beg you baby.

Stay.

Don't lose a mother like her, no one could love you more.

I beg you, fight.

And stay.

Trying to accept what isn't meant for me.

That he isn't the one.

There was a time he said he was.

I feel the sad smile on my face.

The wrinkle on my forehead, caused by him.

Even though it wasn't our fate to be

I hope he thinks of me.

When the other girls don't sing along to our songs.

When they don't laugh the way I did.

When they don't get excited about the moon and the stars.

It's selfish,
but I hope he searches for traces of me in all the girls to come.

As the rain hits my window I feel comfort in my loneliness.

Safe from the storm, I listen.

The chaos from the outside calms my own.

The sound drowns the thoughts in my head.

I close my eyes.

Is this how my inner storm would sound?

Along with the spring sun the memories of my long lost love arises.

The memory fragments are getting pieced back together.

I see him in strangers on the street,
looking for him though I know he's not here..

I know it's stupid, the person I miss no longer exists.

The harsh reality turned my dreams into nightmares.

His lies and deceptions are now haunting me in my sleep.

There's no place left for him and I to be.

Waking up, memories fresh, aching heart.

Lips longing for the bottle, like so many nights before.

Anything to drown the hope of something that'll never be.

And the pain of a time that was..

It's 6 AM. I'm a wanderer.

Walking around my empty city.

Overwriting my patterns of memories.

The past is haunting me where I go.

Erasing my old tracks with new ones.

Year after year, with new memories connected to my feet.

When I picture us together it's almost perfect.

We always have a blast, laughing together and talking about everything and nothing.

How beautiful it would be to add summer dates, roadtrips, singing in the car and kisses to that.

But that picture is cracking.

It's getting clearer that we will never be.

It hurts. My god it hurts..

You must be feeling it too, but something is holding you back.

I think about you all the time, and what we could be.

How do I bury my feelings for you when you make my heart skip beats when I hear you laugh and smile at me?

How do I let this go when everytime you look me deep in the eyes I just wanna kiss you?

Where you wishing and hoping I was gonna show up?

Are you now disappointed when the door's closed and I'm not there?

Does the gym feel cold and boring?

Like it does for me when you're not there?

Does my absence affect you at all?

Will you text me? To check up on me?

To show me that I mean something to you too..?

Are you?

Everytime my phone light up I hope that it's you.

You, showing me that my presence makes you happier.

Please buzz..