molly's hair, **** hair.
show's the bi-polar,
but not the bear.
molly's hair, **** hair.

autumn skies and pumpkin pies.
great orange fields, large in size,
leaf turns to leaf as gold comes to see;
what excitement to behold, and how happy to be.
nippy air and extra layers of sleeves.
bitter cold air as my breath comes alive.
wisping away, fast deep into loving lives.
Oh October is here and I feel just happy!  
to be with everyone with hair blowing shaggy.
I love this time, and I hope i explained why.
it's these
autumn skies
and
sweet salient sighs.

it's hard to write when you don't feel.
because then you just throw around words with meaningless weight .
i try to embrace my trace amounts of hate,
but even then.
nothing comes, weird how that most seem.
I'm happy...I think,
well i'm not sad at the least.
so, then, what am I?
or,
what should I feel?
should i be happy because i'm not sad,
or sad because i have to be sad in order to be happy.
or do i need either to feel either?
I just don't know.
or,
i just don't feel

You made me happy,
now all I am is sad.

I'm just another cat,
with hopes of living in a house.
or ruling the dog,
but all I sadly can do.
is barely catch a mouse.

Who are we?
what,
are we.
we are the creators.
the illustrators.
not of words,
but creation itself.

give it to me straight,
I already write in stanza's and metaphors.
so give it to me plain.
you expect me to be who I am.
but push me to be someone i'm not.
what do you want?
what do,
I want.
i'm not sure.
the only thing I wanted,
was for you to stop wanting.
me,
to  not be.
me.
maybe I also,
want me,
to not
be.

Isolation within my mind,
Stuck in my kell, gasping at the heat
Working till death to finish my design,
Running late, borderlines to meet.
A hero of management,
An Hr call left at the tone.
Stuck in my cubicle fortress.
The place I'm forced to call home.

the hidden are not hidden,
only slightly departed,
buried beneath brick,
on top of brick,
on top of brick.
they lie there departed.
in silence of fear.
wondering when they'll be found,
found, find, and founded

I don't want to grow up in a Podunk hick-billy town,
but I don't want to be part of the white bread, corn cooking crowd.
I want to be respectable,
a spectacle.
someone that's out there, hiding in her dreams.
I don't want to generalize my sentiments.
but i don't want say i'm still free.
i don't want to stay on my rails,
but i don't want to make my own trails.
i want to be dependable,
all sensible.
recollectable from all of everyone's memory's

what to do what to do,
in this cluttered mind of mine.
should I do my work,
or stay in bed,
oh what to do what to do.

it seems I'm writing poetry,
trying to make people.
get to start knowing me.
oh lord,
what should I do.

I guess I want to go somewhere.
I think it might be fun,
if I could go,
and play in the snow,
all I ever get is sun.

maybe I want some rain,
thunder in my mind.
confusing wild and weird.
I really wonder why.

night just wants some sun and the sun wants to sleep
but neither can get either with being alone every week.
some people sleep all alone every night
and that's what scares me to death.
am I one of these fools,
or can I follow these rules.
and that's why I'm so scared of my bed.
the monsters in the closet are just my memory's in deposit.
so I can sleep like the rest of the dead.
i know i'm not one
to laugh or complain
but weirdly my pain,
is the only thing
that wants to keep me sane.
for better or worse, we all have a Cain.
who would stick us in the heart.
if only he could remain.

Can you come with me please?
It would be nice to see the scenes.
I miss you in my pictures.
And all our days spent climbing trees.
I can't explain my feelings,
But I want to say to you.
Our days will end, with you and me.
And together we can be happy.
Happy till our happy end.

Our childhood was funny,
Middle school was so much fun.
Our teens we wished to dumb.
Can you come along with me?
I want you next to me.

We can sing all day
Or laugh and play.
Because we're happy
Together.
But sometimes scrappy.
To me that's fine.
Because you're so beautifully kind.

Can you come always with me?
To watch the buzzing bees.
To gaze at starry nights.
To laugh and live alright.
To take our flight and make a dive.
To see an end and welcome friends.
To be with me
Until
Our happy end.

whisk me away on a ship that's not there.
To an island full of gators! that have been covered in hair.
exploring misty mountains! and climbing epic trees!
diving to the bottom, of the air in the breeze.
imagine a life like that, think of life full of tales!
fighting great monsters, that has a full nine tails!
take me away to a life just with you,
to a world of bickering, but never between two.
now the Lord calls us in, to sleep in her kites.
dreams of flying high, and falling in love with the night.
as you dream away beneath me, I wonder sad and clear.
what comes of tomorrow, if the air is mighty queer?
do we stay inside our castle and find an evil spy?
or go outside in the gales?
and let our imagination,
take flight.

sometimes I wonder,
sometimes way to late at night.
I think about my plunder,
and my life before I had any real sight.
I ponder the actual point,
of life, god, and love.
I think about the way that life always blunders along,
a never ending train, and a never ending song.
when we fade away from time, from minds across the worlds.
I wonder if the earth remembers all our crimes,
from breaking hearts to stealing pearls,
we're all guilty from budding till we curl.
In many ways we're a flower,
in many ways we're not.
I wonder what they're seeing
and I wonder what their not.
i guess they wonder too, about life. probably a lot

I keep a garden of weeds,
They're so hard to pull out,
But the always seem to grow back.
Seldom I follow the guides,
That tell me what to plant.
The seeds I sow,
Always lose their row.
And everything fades away to black.

I've made my bed
I know what I've said.
But i still fill my brain full of lies.
The ugly bliss
Of satisfaction almost missed,
Like a a truth
That was secretly a lie.
A wonderful thought,
Comforting you think,
but really it's not.
Its a tear down your face,
As you tear holes in your face.
With your own self-righteous lies.
You do it for yourself,
it would be nice if it helped.
But it does nothing,
But make me cry.

I'm too tired,
And It's going to get me fired.
My family doesn't work
My mother forces stuff on me like a ****.
My brother is dysfunctional and lazy
All my happy memories seem to be hazy.
I'm too tired to be bored and glad
Only sad.
I'm too distracted to see what's right,
I'm only really able to see what I did wrong.
My fathers half way crazy
And my brain is falling apart.
I'm too tired for your assignment.
Because I can't seem to get my life back into alignment

A mountain full of pressure,
Close to pouring at the seams.
A tree full of ants,
And those ants running with seeds.
A cliff upon an overlook,
A beach upon a sea.
A life left perfect,
A life wasted on me.
No point in trying to end it,
If you waste that perfect life with me.

She sits on the air, and talks with the breeze.
She walks with that style, and mocks me as I freeze.
I swear she stopped a rain storm,
And you could swear she just said no.
She's a mountain of power, and an engine of burning coal.
Those eyes sharp as glass, and slicker than some ice.
I swore to her I'd stop, but I kept it going on thrice.
I never knew she felt, I didn't think she could.
But I saw her there, weeping, and tugging, and pulling out her hair.
I knew then I was nothing, nothing to her, but pain,
taking away the joy, of her. My Beloved rain.

I built a prison of paper,
But I willingly let it stand.

To keep my self tethered
To these words only I can understand.

It keeps out the angels,
And keeps my demons in.

So no one can be affected,
From the enemy hidden within.

It's a fortresses built on lies,
with foundations crumbling down.

But I'm happy with being crushed,
As long as you can never frown.