She had shown to me,
Aurora
Aurora sweet alighted
the excited verdant ions
a scar of atmosphere
the mantle undivided
to give as sacrifice
to give life to snow

Ye not tempt me with it
Burden of beauty
of foggy things in my dreams
at fancy ballroom mirages

Indifference,
to be found in the refrigerated drink section
outside the air is cold and cools oil on gravel
while across town the burning embers of a home
melt the snow into rivers

The fog of dew on the leaves
drunk, speak the lips of the slain
to look up into the blue
and find solace in the rains.

Self-indulgence
eats away at me
like my vanity
gnaws at the bones
of my bank account.

For so long I have loved you and
This much I know is true
But now I find
For the first time
I fell IN-love with you

“Ought”
Ought to do
What a strange word indeed
Very different
From “will”
Will do
Rather like it’s
Parent
Following behind      the child
Stubbornly refusing the jacket
They
     “Ought”
To wear

There must be
a method
to turn off freedom.

To waste motion in a curve
and glide down the city
as cascade.

To be sunk in the fumes
of machines or dance
in front of a choir
without any *******.

To undress in the cold
sensations of the crowd.

To chew the furniture of words.

To fall into the sound of water.

The idea of thought
would be framed
in museums
and memorial sites.

Like an ancient artifact of struggle.

All the small things will float in the air
and we’d decorate the problem of life
with the husks of memory;

without choice
life would be a nail
deep in the crust of flux

and language      moss at the rim of our lips.

The illusion of free will
And false happiness.
Lives ruined by factors
We can't control.
Lives dictated by things
We can't talk reason to.

Today was the worse day of my life so far.
My future self slipping away from my fingertips....just gone.
I could see my house, my career, my husband and my children...all just crumble in my fingers.
Everything that should be destined, is now gone once again.
For the third time may I add.
You would think after so many heartbreaks you would get use to it.
No.
At this point, in my 26 years of life, you will never get use to it.
I wait for the day I get to stay in a hotel room just contemplating my life's choices.
And just finally ending it all.
Ya, I guess you can always say 'You're young, you have alot going for you, it's never too late for a happy ending', yet that may be true, in my mind, I'll always see a chubby emotional single hispanic women whose future will be hoarding shelter dogs alone in her home.
That image, just reflecting back at me in the mirror, seems to be the closes to a happy ending I'll ever get in this lifetime.
So, for the time being, I'll be sleeping and closing my eyes to this nightmare.
Because I would rather sleep all day and forget everything for a couple of hours than to be awake all day and remember everything.

They are spearheads
The trees, stewsters in the Grey
On Somber window.

If you are war,
Then I am peace.
If you are coffee,
Then I am cream
Love is sugar,
It makes us sweet.

When you are down,
I would dive to catch you.
If you heart crashes,
And breaks into pieces,
Then I would glue them altogether
Even if it takes time.

When the sun rises up,
All because of your smile’s trace
The roses would blossom
As the light colors your face
I would be purely happy
As you are,  too.

No matter how busy I could be,
I wanted to tell you,
“You are the one I value the most.”
Do not worry about me, I’m fine.
My pain does not matter much to me anyway.
It would be always for you.

Just wanting to give you something
Receive and keep it for me, love.
My heart is like the shining sun,
But my love for you
Reaches the ends of the universe.


These are the little things
You do for  love.