I willingly say the words you need,
again and again without question.
Allowing them to slit through my heart,
If to hear them, is what you need most.
The price to keep yours close.
You split down the length of my bones.

May they cut me, as I speak them.
and burn me, as I feel them leave.
You'll take them,
And thank you,
as you watch me bleed.

My mind keeps spinning,
My heart is breaking,
My thoughts are circling,
And I can’t seem to find any relief.
I know I shouldn’t be feeling this way,
That all the things that are happening to me
Are not that bad, and I shouldn’t worry.
Yet I do, and I can’t stop, and
I know that’s unhealthy,
But I have an overreacting tendency
That’s so natural.
My mind naturally runs in circles,
Like a computer program that is set
To only one function that cannot be
Overrun.
This overreaction is slowly killing me,
From the inside out.
I’m cold, I’m hot,
I’m hungry, I can’t stand to look at food,
I’m okay, and then I’m not.
I’m not okay.

Our good days were good but our bad days were **** near catastrophic.

Tears of Man


You have the right to remain silent.
Do you make the choice or remain violent?
Do you evolve and become more civilized?
Or do you choose to stay belligerent?


You choose to be healthy like you are told.
You stop eating junk food; replaced with cold,
And in the end are you any happier?
I have become numb, apart from automatic laughter.


I laugh at things you don’t find funny.
I have thousands of instant thoughts at once.
I eat and eat and still there is a rumble inside my tummy.
You think I am clever, but my hat says ‘D’ for ‘Dunce’.
I tell you tales, and as they set sail,
The rain comes down and people complain;
But I do not complain, for I only see waves,
That carry me home to people I love.
My God!  
It sure is,
A beautiful day!


(C)2018 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.

You’re a polar teacher
Taught me how to smile while I’m aching
Taught me how to laugh until my body started shaking
Taught me what it’s like to be important
Taught me how to push myself when I thought I couldn’t
These are wonderful things that you helped me learn
But there are some lessons that make me burn
You taught me how to cry in silence to not cause a scene
You taught me that there’s a point where all I can do is collapse and scream
You taught me trust is something that can break
You taught me that there’s only so much I can take

she says
that he is her drug of choice
and i agree

he is a dangerous
illegal
life ruining drug

he gives her the high
and when she comes down from it
she falls so hard
and he withdraws himself
messes with her brain
ruins her mental state

but she's addicted to him
so even though
he beats her up
on the outside and in
she will
again
again
again
come crawling back to him

As years faded by
I was in-denial I was living a lie
swallowed by my own false identity
by burying reality deep inside
more high than sober
living in a nightmare that is never over
with everyday, my senses fade
and I complacently follow into your malicious games
losing touch of why I stay
constantly confused of who I am underneath my name
told myself every night this is real
but when walking during the day I am filled with shame
I'm not an object for you to steal
layers of your delusions
I'm trying to peel
all my colors, you have concealed
even though I am now miles away
I'm still trying to remember how to feel.

-a.t

Scittering across the forest floor,
My thoughts dance,
and twirl.

Trailing down your skin,
With lovely touches.
I am not good enough.

I want to hurt you,
Hurt myself,
Let myself ******* fall.

I wonder what it would be like if you watched the whole thing.

darling its been a minute
and ive left you love notes in your ears
but i cant stop sobbing
and these minutes feel like years

i think im unhealthy
and ive been blaming everyone but you
i can't say this correctly
while saying i love you too

im sorry