You just scattered the pieces.
How can you break what's already broken?
The comforting clench of the hand around the knife.
Those eyes.
The chill.

But those eyes, they make me believe.
In love.
In you.
I believe.
Yet I cry.

The stick of the point indenting my skin reflects the light of the situation.
Your eyes.
"I would never hurt you."

I hate you.
My eyes.
Filled with the tears from my non exsistant heart.
The heart that is yours.
The heart that is yours.

"I would never hurt you"
"You're the one thing I care about"
My eyes glisten as they stare into yours.
"I hate you"

A broken vase, angles jagged
With sharp protrusions, fingers
Barely holding, splinters
Unglued, finely balanced

Pieces lying one on another
Holds shape together, barely
Slightest tremor, injury
It all threatens to shatter

Vessel has its supports gone
The structure has no resilience
Absent lustre or brilliance
Shards in spotlight glisten

Why not glue the vase back?
Why leave dangerous pieces?
Painful protruding edges
Waiting to shatter or crack?

Fixing glass means danger
Can create injuries and worse
Injure self, injure others
And vase can break further

So, hold collective breath
And leave the shards askew
Meanwhile, dangers rue
Resolved only upon death

all the days just fade into one another
i do nothing, i see nothing, i am nothing
even medication and self harm cannot bring me out of this darkness
i binge and purge the demons out of me

i take all the pills at once to drown out my own self hate
i take them all to accompany the numbness in my heart
i slip down further and further
the darkness gets darker and darker

i drink away the voices in my mind
i drink until they go from sharp and bitter
to warm and soft
i drink the pain away

i cry until my heart caves in
i cry because there's no other way
i can suffer like i should
i cry until my eyes dry out

i take the pills
i drink everything away
i cry all night
until i find the courage to end my own life.

I should feel the sharp sting of Betrayal,
as easy as it may--
I have forgotten many Memories,
and forgotten which ones have Stayed--

You gave your so called love to Another,
You gave "our song" as "hers"--
As I was once a beautiful Angel,
am now the devil that you curse--

and How carefully do we tread upon,
the cracks within our faults--
are only the things we let up on,
pretending to exalt--

So it seems only right that I would write,
a Vindictive note Of You--
But darling, I haven't an ill-intent
and the past, I cannot rue.

Words run sharp,
Serrated verbs and
Cut-throat consonants
Against the back of my mind,
Blood trickles,
A stab wound that left a gaping hole
In the memories,
Shards scattered on the floor,
Tiptoeing so precariously,
Weaving through glimpses
Of eyes that were aflame with passion
And a smile that made the heart stop,
Not even a lobotomy could pierce the
Vibrantly violent flashes that are projected
In my brain,
Nor could an exorcism raise the remnants
Of tortured souls that were collected like dust
From the slate that I desperately tried to scrub clean

A moment, captured
Perfectly
A detail, remembered
Sharply
A recollection, visualized
Clearly
A camera given a soul.

Ginger nut crunch base
creamy Philly cheese
bitter **** lemon filling
birthday cheesecake
tongue tasty sweet when we kiss

Pressure, deadlines,
Trauma and stress,
Give me the weight of the world,
And I will carry it.

But as strong as I am,
I'm even more weak.
My strength is all surface,
But my weakness runs deep.

Inside I'm so fragile,
So please be aware,
Like glass, I break easily,
So handle with care.

Give me impossible jobs,
And I will fight through them all,
But if you throw a sharp word,
I will crumble and fall.

I'm strong but so weak,
I'm fragile, hard to reach,
My strength is thin, my weakness deep,
So please break in, but don't break me.