look up.
watch
as the watercolours bleed into the canvas of the sky
see the freckles of stars and constellations
bask
in the momentary warmth that you feel, comfort; safety
it's beautiful isn't it?
see the white clouds
bright and ever so superior
stretching across the horizon
carelessly
the area that belonged to the dark seas
but no longer
ever since the clouds claimed their territory
smiling, careless clouds
believe
that the world we live in is like sugar
sweet and pleasant and utterly pure
pretend
that the sugar isn't crumbling
bit by bit
piece by piece
falling apart
dissolving into sticky, empty nothingness
look down.
see the cracks on the ground
tell yourself that they're only on the surface
shallow
that they can be easily mended with cement
(they can't.)
and rehearse
rehearse the parts you're meant to play
a good sibling, child, friend
person
act as though you put others before yourself
as though you think their happiness is more important than yours
as though you'd sacrifice your life
for them
because you're selfless, aren't you?
(you aren't.)
perform
the rehearsed banter and
the perfected smiles and
the expertly timed eye roll -- **** your head to the left squinted eyes
glare for half a second before rolling them
and watch the stars dissipate
disappear
as the haze clouds over it
from all the pollution
problems that we promised we would fix
and the sky soon settles into an eternal darkness
dry acrylic
look straight ahead.
see eyes and noses and lips
some familiar and others not
see sincere smiles and forced smiles
see the world we live in
beautiful and wretched and human
did we make it this way
or did it make us this way
see the people around us
the eyes and noses and lips that form faces
the sincere smiles and forced smiles that form images
we're all beautiful and wretched and human
and there's absolutely everything and nothing we can do to change anything
look up or down or straight ahead or whatever
just look
(maybe that's all we can really do)
just look
and see
and breathe
(breathe.)
and be
be beautiful and wretched and human
be everything you've ever wanted to be
or everything you've never wanted to be
it's okay to be okay
it's okay to not be okay
it's okay to just be
it's okay.
just look
and see
and breathe.
