It's 6:12
I'm old guy high, clearly in an altered state,
yet
meandering
fractally indentical
taste in dramatic pre-
sent-sations
satiate my
wish is
your command, and in this state you find
the man,
ecce ****, at home with his books,
we look in on him through all
the lockedinlemmeites let
loose in wisdom's grandest scheme,

patience, yes, and prudence, along with fire,
Prometheus, thought ahead, knew ahead,
need for patience forms patience in
tiny, tiny, fizzy foamy quantum of hope,
nee solace, in the drama, using legos,

I watched  as my grandson told of his mission,
listen, when grandpa says listen.
How is this your mission?
You made me know it, so I do, that's the way it works.
He is four, who has will to ask for more?

I’ve grown numb
And accustomed to
Whatever that was deemed
Extraordinary.
Does this make me dull
If the complexity of the universe
Has become
Ordinary?
No longer a stranger or an enigma
To my inner experience?
Does this make me boring
If I no longer find joy
In discovering something
Unsurprising?
For when you
Constantly dwell and live
In the unknown
Is it really a big deal
To find something unexpected?
I mean... what did you expect anyway?

I am more interested in human interactions
In the consequences
And the causes
Of my actions
And I have internalised the outside world
And the outside wonders and
Discipline and harmony
Has become my quest and
My childish discovery.

A whatifery quest. What if you cannot lose?

my life is the role you play, or
yours the role I play and we
each must win,
or winning is nothing and I am alone.
You know the feeling,

letting go of the held on to
to let be the held in,

imagine, me a friend, in a word, a mind
like yours,
good in all its wishes to

to make
to pay, to take, to give, to be, to see,
to think
I know you know by acting out, doing,
having being
in this bubble where we all may breathe
easy
no filters needed in my realm, we winnowed
well.
All that remains is seed, the chaff has gone
to dust and ashes
for good right use
in futures unimagined as yet.

have to find the center of a long alley
ice cream cones of last year, the craving
our way to the center, people buzzing over
so hard to guess the right thing of the wrong

lights are floating through the room, ghosty
at the center of the alley, we will find salvation
smoothen a path inside the snow of the past
frozen water, ice chunks, shannon, help me

have to find the center of a long alley
get me some ***** and a cake, let's go
eat it on-the-go, the best thing now is to go
your mental breakdown was the finest

for a long time, a long time, long time

I daily call you out my inner voice.
I get to listen to my echoes but no replies from you.

I daily search you my inner voice.
You are nowhere.

I can't feel your presence in me.

Do you still perdure in me ?

Where are you ?
Are you hidden behind the ebony trees in the forbidden forest ?
Has fire burned you to ashes ?

Your unread words on the paper have been washed away by the spilled water.
The regret of not reading you is burning inside me.

Yes , I always kicked you out of my soul.
But this was never my instinct.
I did this under the stimulus of others.

You are my soul.
Without you , my life is a deserted valley.

Wherever you are , please come back to me.
I promise you that I will always listen to you and obey your orders.

I have a strange mind —
It only remembers things
that are too cold
and tragic

I have a strange mind —
It only remembers misery,
grief and torments

In my sleep
my mind only gives me
ceaseless nightmares

Sometimes my mind
would go on a quest
in search of a speck
of hope
only for it to get lost

Sometimes my mind
creates moments of bliss
but I can only see
void
or maybe
there's really nothing to see.

I have a strange mind
and I'm starting to wonder
maybe my mind
can only recall moments
that are real.

Being rich gives you the luxury of wanting to have nothing.
Being poor creates the misery of wanting things that you sometimes don’t even need.
Being wise makes you doubt the simplest thing
While ignorance, ironically, brushes off any kind of mystery and critical thinking is dismissed

It is funny how we tend to live peacefully in a plethora of paradoxes
While most of us believe that most things are elementary
Who can explain why we can open and close a door in detail?
Ask me to clarify how a moving bike keeps balance and I would probably fail
I want to learn everything, ignite my curiosity without the need of matchboxes
But I wouldn’t have enough space in my narrow and selective memory

I remember being human without really knowing what it means
I remember being a person, who sometimes wants to forget about his feelings
I am in the middle of a limitless quest for sense and clarity
Hoping that one day I will understand why I need to “be”

Curiosity is the starting point of every and each discovery
Regardless of the field, regardless the genius minds behind it
Without questions, no answers bringing us countless benefits
The Moon would just be a boomerang regularly turning into a frisbee
Hanged up high in the sky, seemingly rough and dry
We would be fooled by a round street light, just like a fly
Bumping our head repeatedly on a clean window
Illustrating the fact that sometimes ignorance can hinder forward movement
When a movement can open our eyes to an underlying element
To eventually help out a neighboring fellow

Being right is often seen as an absolute
Omitting the fact that Einstein taught us that everything is relative
Falling head first on the ground would probably hurt before a bump would protrude
Falling head first on the lake refreshes the body and mind in a way that’s effective
In fact, both go forward but one is injured and the other enjoying
One has to heal while the other is playing

Writing can be a way to escape
Writing can be a way to explain
Writing can be a way to entertain
Writing can be a way to shape
The views of a body of people
In a society where individuals sometimes fortunately answer to the call
For a common rather than an individual goal

In order for our dream to become reality
We have to forget that it is a dream and start to think of it as a necessity
Before thinking about the steps needed to be taken
One by one until life on Earth slightly resembles the one imagined in heaven.

your heart is banging
against your chest
the end of your quest...







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