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i’m so used of not being good enough that’s why i push everyone away,

i don’t want to ever go through with it—pushing people away,

but it’s my insecurity whispering in my ears to push them away.

when will this end?
George Ittyerah Nov 2020
My love, I’m not sure what value I add to your life? It scares me that I may not be good enough for you!!

“Oh graceful one, you bring your intellect, kindness, your very being and your life on the table.

I wish I could commit the moon and stars, but alas the world is too realistic and practical for me. There is much that holds me back cause of the baggage I have to carry of my past. But in this parallel universe, where you and I, reign we bring those aspects that is entirely different. A world that has dreams, fantasies, love, craziness and all those aspects that is supposed to be enjoyed but forbidden.. everything that provides freedom which in the world is chained by norms, morality and rules.

We break free in our world which is what makes this relationship memorable and exciting.

Your value therefore is much more than you can imagine, quantify or even list down, for this world is empty without you.
George Ittyerah Nov 2020
As night falls and I feel lonely
Wishing I could hear you speak,
of the day - the good and the bad
and as we get ready to retreat.

But I realise that I have no right,
Nor the license to complain -
Of the distance or the silence,
Or the lack of me in your conscience
You have no idea how much I pine for you

Yet I know I have no right
No right, to need you
No right to miss you
No right to ask if you're okay
I have no right to love you
But I still do

Yes I do.
Spriha Kant Sep 2020
I daily call you out my inner voice.
I get to listen to my echoes but no replies from you.

I daily search you my inner voice.
You are nowhere.

I can't feel your presence in me.

Do you still perdure in me ?

Where are you ?
Are you hidden behind the ebony trees in the forbidden forest ?
Has fire burned you to ashes ?

Your unread words on the paper have been washed away by the spilled water.
The regret of not reading you is burning inside me.

Yes , I always kicked you out of my soul.
But this was never my instinct.
I did this under the stimulus of others.

You are my soul.
Without you , my life is a deserted valley.

Wherever you are , please come back to me.
I promise you that I will always listen to you and obey your orders.
If you are too much weak to be submissive and can't face others then just be a slave of yourself....
archana May 2020
Enticing smiles
Wretched hearts
They're all clawing at me.
My skin a mere fragment healing,
looks through the stifling pain.
I have an entire life to spend, alone.
Collecting memoirs, Indigo shaded lilies
And heart-shaped bruises
Coloured like my veins.
Enticing smiles.
They give you a lot to believe in.
To rewrite the philosophies you own.
To revolutionise your mind.
Glimpses of heaven.
And the sea bed.
But they're enticing smiles
and so they are gone before
you realise.
Janal Rajput Apr 2020
We tried to grow red roses;

But they were rotten from root, out of place,

In a colorful meadow we once called our own,

When you left me, running away without a trace,

We tried to grow red roses;

Maybe they would have bloomed, had you stayed,

But I doubt it, your thumb is as green as your heart,

Instead you left me to rejuvenate your rot and decay,

We tried to grow red roses;

But the seeds hadn't a chance, you knew from the start,

Emotionally unavailable gardeners reap what they sew,

I found many fields, where you also crossed your heart,

We tried to grow red roses;

Talking other gardener's into broken and cracked promises,

Already planning on your next field to seed rot through,

Heinz-sight exposed your compromises to excuses,

We tried to grow red roses;

But they are nothing but ash and grey dust in the wind,

See my garden now comes with fences and lie detectors,

To detect liars like you, throwing them in my compost bin,

I will regrow those red roses;

So they bloom brilliantly, they will shake in effervescence,

With both of my gentle hands, without your green heart,

So they know a love that is constant and not just convenient,

I will regrow those red roses;

So that I can learn to love my garden again, in all its glory,

Not one just filled with roses but bluebells, daffodils, violets,

And when you come back, Gaze upon me with green envy.
Smiling Queen Dec 2019
& today when
I sat to write down
my feelings,
I found that the
pen I carried had
no ink & the paper
was already drenched
with my tears
& so I scribbled my
thoughts with the blood
that dribble off my
fingers on these
rough walls that
caged my soul.

~your smiling queen :)
Written on 30th November 2019.
Erin Oct 2019
i opened my heart
every thought and word welcomed
now you say too much
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