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em Jan 2019
thank you for teaching me
what i could not learn
on my own

in a way you empower me
yet i constantly
am belittled
by the pressures unspoken

i am powerful
i am powerless
and i am humbled
by the sharp stabs
to my confidence

at times i feel superior
to all negative forces
but then you come around
to destroy me yet again

i will let you in no more
for i am bigger than
the insecurities
and the headaches
i am forced to endure
every
second
of
my
life.

to be indubitably fearless
is an amazing thing
to think that nothing
nothing
could ever
hold me back

but the thought
of never again being restrained
is foreign

to be fearless
is ideal
but could never be possible
when you fill me with doubt
and regret
and negative energy

but to be fearless
is to look you in the face
and say
*******
in trying to face my insecurities, i must face them head on with passion. i must persist, i will overcome
Crystal Freda Jan 2019
She lost her touch.
She lost her smile.
She hasn't been herself
in quite a long while.

Every day she'd look,
but all seemed gone.
She lay in bed
for all was wrong.

Her thoughts and actions
were not her at all.
She'd crumble at every step,
every mile, every fall.

She stayed this way
for a couple of years.
Waking up to sadness
and lying in tears.

After all this time
she wants to change things.
Let hope take a hold
and let happiness sting.

She will find her touch.
She will smile.
She will find herself,
but this time in a short while.
Willow Jan 2019
“be love” she said
the words rolling off her lips
like sweet honey down a
glass jar

he wipes the remnants from her chin and smiles.

peering
through the dusty window pane
opaqued by the loss of you
i muster the strength to look forward
as i always do

now the cobwebs have begun to clear,
and this glass will shine like
it once did
on a sunny Wednesday
afternoon
Desire Dec 2018
I grew out my beard.
I grew out my stomach.
My ears ring randomly.  
My eyes see things differently.
I speak or say less.  I move in silence.
I sleep in when I want.
I haven't touched razors since my return
nor rifles since the field ops.
I've grown in maturity mentally.
I've grown insensitive verbally.
I've grown to miss the uniform
and pride of belonging in a brotherhood;
I miss my extended family.
I miss the people, not the troubles.
I miss the gym, where others alike
flexed invisible muscles.
My days once had routine,
pattern, structure and rhythm.
Weekends full of workouts, worship, and beer.
Weeks full of work, blood, sweat, and tears.
I've grown in experience.
I've regained freedom as a civilian.
But the transition has been a grueling process.
Yet, I've grown to be grateful nonetheless,
as not everyone gets to go back "home" ...
(remember the fallen) ...
However, if I'm honest, I don't think there's ever
an actual adjustment...
[I'm growing]
XLIII. Adapt and Overcome
-
The life of a Veteran
-
Random reflection
As my heart grew more enamored,
And as I felt this burning flame,
It was then I knew what mattered—
It was to give Beauty its name.

Her image would not go away,
But all the words I spoke would err,
So overcome I could not say
A description that suited her.

What should perfect Beauty be called?
There is no name that could suffice.
Overwhelmed I was too enthralled—
My language was too imprecise.

You simply are so beautiful,
That any name would be inapt.
Your Beauty makes my heart so full—
That I am speechlessly enrapt.
Instagram @insightshurt
Blogging at www.insightshurt.com
Buy “Insights Hurt: Bringing Healing Thoughts To Life” at store.bookbaby.com/book/insights-hurt
Lou Dec 2018
June 29th, 2017
It’s been 1 year, 4 months and 19 days.
For 1 year, 4 months and 19 days.
Count the acidic tree rings
Nearly 504;
Bright
A.m. eyes
On East Ferry,
in contrast of noir
I say, man;
June 29th, 2017.

It’s time to get a new calendar,
Cause I count 5,000 dollars later
and not a sense of a cent
was fined for my remorse.

I’ve been fine and fined.
Holes in my pockets
dropping seeds of change
planting fines

Into puddles
and potholes
showing deep interest
into the alignment of my car
stalling my engine with debts.

19,000 dollars and growing later;
I learned what trigger warnings cost
and ironically
I wrote a paper on it.

Don’t get me, wrong I am grateful
But, I had to rip holes
into all my jean pockets.
I mean, **** it,
I never had much going in
And I should quit smoking
My lighter is dead
Only blue and red
Sparks lived well in my mirrors
On, June 29th, 2017.


From the wall I was chained to,
I enrolled into college
My mom drove me home from my first class.
My lawyer wasn’t much of a lecturer,
He spoke math for 1,400 dollars

250 and 9 weeks.
106 a month for 52.

That’s enough math for this semester.

I drank with my night instructor on Mondays after 9,
He wanted to hear my music
We drank whiskey salted potholes on Allen
I counted his tree rings to 4/4 measure in regret;
20 years steady.

I graduated on a Tuesday morning,
I didn’t call him back to thank him for the irony.

I acknowledged our acidic rings
With glass cheered laughter
Swallowing thanks for each other’s company.
9 weeks and I don’t recall ever leaving the room.
43 went after,

And today life is that,
Paid for in lessons,
No need for pockets

I am those potholes
bumping coffee all over me
20 mins late to my first class.
I can repave them
but they won’t stay filled
It’s OK to want smoother roads to school.
I’m late but I’m here

I’m a mess.
******* would see art.
People have his eyes on me.
I want to be framed and splattered
on the walls of your home
A household mess .
It’s OK to have a passion.

Look into my tree rings
How old am I?
Its restorative to count
27 rings of rebirth
Look at me still growing
I believe I can grow in Paradise-lost fire
Or in Buffalo salt

I am my flaws
I counted them

My alcohol abuse,
One beat of 2,653 in 2017
I don’t know how to put an apology
On a music sheet.


The Jazz fills my potholes in the morning
before these hallways

My grey area is stained glass in Villas library,
Each step is eclectic
From shoe up and over is stand still art

Lighters flash cigarettes burning
But prints pictures of thankful new memories

With all of you in it.
Thank you for helping me with today’s date.
Its for a course I am taking in college. I hope this doesn't shade me as a fool. I'm kind of self-conscious of this one and hoping for feedback. Thanks.
Sabrina Dec 2018
Rise above
It all
Don't let anyone stop you
Not anymore
We won't fall
Let the rage take over you
Show them what you're made of
Show them the strength that's made you go up
Be the person
You've always wanted to be
Show them even though you've been through your own kind of hell,
You're still genuinely smiling.
i had a little lyricy tune i made up in my head and put it into a poem, this doesn't really apply to me but i'm sure it could inspire others :P
What happens when I get the bottle open?
When I'm strong enough to let it go?

all the hopes and dreams I once had
escape
and I gain the knowledge to be free

What happens when I get the bottle open?

I stab the villain and not the innocent
finally slaying my demons
it's liberating
can't you see?

What happens when I get the bottle open?

I'll finally see the truth
maybe you will too
be happy for me
this is no set back

What happens when the bottle finally opens?

and all my dreams come true
I'm laying on the beach
listening
as the crashing waves
consume me
so nicely

What happens when the bottle's open?

and there's no going back
like Pandora's box of bottles
and all that's left is to
sink

What happens if the bottle's already open?

and I can't hide it anymore

I'm sorry
for wasting

Everything

but the bottle's been opened
and I can't waste this

not now

there is no strength to close it.
SEHO Nov 2018
I am today
A grain of sand
An insignificant moment
Yet it is a grain of sand
In the desert of time
Where my the wind is life
Mountains of hopes and dreams
Pits full of anger and fear
There is no forecast in this desert
No such thing as expected change
Today are mountains
Tomorrow is caves

Wherever the wind blows
Whichever way time goes
No matter how tall the mountain has become
Or where these pits come from

Walk through your desert
Moments here will never come twice
Joyful moments can only come by if you climb
If you walk through your desert

The desert of time


©SEHO | http://www.seho.site
Walk through your desert
Secret Whispers Nov 2018
I watched as my depression took control of my body
It made me push away everybody
Until I was left with nobody
But me.
I thought to myself “how could this be?”
This wasn’t me.
I was never one to be unhappy.

I gave up
I let myself be
I fell back from the crowd until I was the only thing I could see.
I faked my bright charisma so that no one would see that depression found me.
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