Words, thoughts, like chords;
Sewn, printed, onto paper.
Works, strewn, unwanted;
Taken to ground like ashes.
Owners forgotten, children;
Stained, broken, like old dolls.
Worn, exhausted, crippled;
All to become their elders.

She was forced onto the bed or pinned to the floor, the environment didn't matter, the outcome was the same
His breath would graze over her neck, he groped mercilessly
Never once did she look into his eyes or made a sound
Never once did he hesitate or stop his assault
Never once did she attempt to stop him, out of fear, out of embarrassment
The tearing of her clothes, his brutal grunts
She never utters a word or makes any movement
Her head would be slightly turned away from the scene, her eyes opened, staring into space or closed, not wanting to watch this unfold
A sharp intake of breath would pass her lips as his assault began
His continuous thrusts felt as if needles were pricking her untouched skin
The agony goes on for seconds, minutes, maybe even hours until he finishes
He tosses her aside, doesn't matter, the outcome is the same
She stays immobile, on some occasions, crying softly
She doesn't know why it happens, it just does
Her body is a fortress he conquered, which now lays collapsed
Her emotions, her thoughts, scrambled
The pain she feels from the assault goes unnoticed
Never utters a word or makes any movement
The reoccurring thought crosses her mind, "Why did this happen? Why did it happen to me?"
He takes one last look and then leaves
She lays there on the bed or the floor, her arms wrapped around herself, cradling her body
Doesn't matter what the environment is, the outcome is always the same
Her innocence is taken and now she has nothing...

When I yelled "No"
You tightened your grip on my throat,
and whispered *"You know you want it"

What even is the point of this? Honestly, look me in the eye and tell me.
You think this is fun do you? Ignoring my pain as if I’m nothing too?
I guess I’m not strong when it comes to words at all,
I stutter, I panic and I fear what comes out of my mouth.
Written words on paper and text that appears in front of me,
only can tell me the truth behind this artificial smile.
I’ve became a ghost of a girl, a girl who was somewhat beautiful.
Yet I saw none of the sweetness you had told me.
I don’t understand why I can’t see the positivity,
you scream at me and tell me, for **** sake, see ME.
I can’t bare screaming, the screeching within my heart.
You want me to love you, well honestly, ******* let me love you.
You broke my sweet self into millions of pieces, by forcing your opinions,
down my throat like poison.
You wanted me to smile at myself, then you should have gave me,
the reasons to form those smiles instead of screaming at me.
You want me to smile then I will carve it into my skin,
you can not force my emotions out of my heart.
You said you loved me dearly, yet you betrayed me.
You forced a drink down your throat with a party over me.
I thought you wanted to hold me tightly and kiss me too,
but when I discovered another was better, he left alongside you.

I am not the person you
want me to be.
And no matter how
many times you tell me
to change, i will keep
my feet anchored to the ground,
not letting myself fall into
your mold of a perfect human being.

I am not the person you
expect me to be.
And for the last time, stop
telling me that I am not
good enough for you.

I am finally the person you
want me to be.
And the person that stares
back in the mirror, is not
who I want to be.

Oh
The left hand.
One I use when my strength and trust has retired
Lays upon a lightly laced (cloth)
Disembarc of the covenant.

Lick the place that my hand lays
On.
I
Humanly wrong
Make gong out of the chaotic amount
Noisy bloods hitting the walls on it's way out to the rest of her vessel.

She can make what is mine hers.
She can make the mind like purse.
So she speaks.

My want move the weak hand reach.
So this something can compete with
And maybe even complete sweet.

**** self made namesake peach.
Stir & heat with onions
And wash the perceptive pounds I
POUND
These tons now neat your Golden ratio
To be betrayed and be peated

To she who rolled me.over in bed.
And kissed my ****** lips.
Who bared my chest
And took control
and wouldn't get her hands off my untouched hips.
The basement dark
and her touch cold
made me feel evil within my veins.
I didn't know what was going on,
I was only in 6th grade.
To the girl who forced my face
to go beneath the belt.
I'm sorry if it hurt you when
I bit your piece of felt.
It smelled of death and
Was hot like fire
Please don't shove my head again
down near your fishy damp dryer.
To the *** addict I was with
for far over a year.
*** 5 times a day
from the front side and rear.
Well you ruined it for me
I don't know what tight is.
But I do remember the scars you gave me
when your claws would tighten.
To the girl I'm with now.
It's our second month.
I'm glad we took our time
because tomorrow night
you and I will make love.
Not forceful motions that leave me torn
or black holes that inhale me
but two bodies making love.
I know you will not fail with me <3

A poor roman whose blood spilled,
Far from the homeland of patrician
Is how I feel currently.

As wounded as I currently am
By the grins little devils address to me
I chant glories of my torturers as they ax me down

What are they going to do with my bones. Would they sport it as jewelry,  closer to their hearts?
What are they going to do with my flesh? Have a relish on it?

What if I was destined to be a prey, not even taking a glimpse of your love by any other mean than pain...

Can I still envision it as some sort of gain, with it being the price of my very life
And so, my very dignity, or I shall say the remnants of it, are defunct along with me

Monkey See, Monkey Do
People See, People Do
Society Does, People Do

We are the puppets of society
We are the ones being fed by their lies
We are the ones being washed in their waters of the tamed
We are the ones being forced to accept, and to not question
We are their most prized possession that they cannot run without

To be seen as perfect
no flaws, no edges, no imperfections
If not, we must change,
we must evolve to their ideal standard
To be like their models
with their photoshop bodies and their fake smiles
To be what they force us to be

To act, and not think
To use our fist and tongue
but never our brain
To do with out hesitation
To speak without a thought
To never becoming an original
but always a carbon copy

We are their soldiers
but never their hero
To be saved
but never to save the day
To be the killers for society
but never to be killed

We are puppets
With society holding the strings
We are their model copies
that can never become an individual
To be their ideal image
But to never be ourselves


C.N