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Louisa Coller Sep 26
And I feel sad or lost or hurt,
I tried to capture it like it's a painting,
then I wonder why it never works,
because it is impossible to ever make it work.

In order to make something,
you have to grab supplies from anywhere,
but I am chuffed and I am choked,
the strings they keep me bound here in my heart.

No matter what I do it will be dismissed,
no matter what I say it will be ignored,
unless it's too late and they have to listen,
so until they have to listen - I may as well be quiet.

The amount of objectification, sexism and racism,
it's all like a merry-go-round, a carousel,
it's never-ending, it's never-ending,
and it ***** that it's never-ending.

Because, it doesn't need to be never-ending.

It hurts to hear it though,
the amount of people who just assume so.
I guess they would with the way I display,
you'd think I wasn't one, anyway.

But I'm not, and I know that,
I think I've always known that,
in my heart something didn't feel right,
and yet here I am treating my body like a canvas.

But I'm more like a notebook.

I hope I can empty the notebook.

I feel like a machine, and yet I'm not immortalised,
a machine might stay the same forever,
maybe my files will corrupt,
maybe my memory will be wiped.

But there are some that don't,
but there are some that last.

I won't immortalise anything, will I?

I always had a hope, a sense of relief,
a moment of comfort and content by simply being me,
but I've been led to believe, that I am not good enough,
but if I lead to believe, maybe one day I would've been enough.

We shouldn't find the irrational a dismissive thing,
we should find it inspiring to think in a delusional state,
while everyone is stuck and believing what is real is static,
how can we move on when everything stays the same?

Time changes whether we like it or not, and yet,
here I become quiet and timid because I know deep down,
I too, can not say,
a single thing.

I am frustrated that I am the same as everyone else,
in how I act, but I bet deep down, there is this little voice,
tugging away at every single one of them,
whether good, or bad - or maybe in-between.

There are some that exist, who believe in good - are bad,
it costs too much, to watch the collapse of the world,
I had wished, dreamed, prayed and weep, dread and begged,
that one day someone else will hear my words and tell me...

That I was wrong in the best of ways.
Louisa Coller Aug 18
A man of your past is so desirable,
You write love letter stories to this day.
Yet your lover of the present is here,
will you write them anything again?
Louisa Coller Aug 16
I'm sorry for the damage,
they left cracks which I can't fill.
Just please admire me a little longer,
nobody will.
Louisa Coller Aug 16
You ridicule me for my feelings,
Which are valid, strong and hopeful.
You make mistakes like all of us,
So when will you admit you've done wrong?

I'm so fractured it's become unbareable,
My kindness is loved until,
You don't want to give it back.

You'd rather infuriate me,
Like I'm the bad guy.
You'd stab me with the knife,
but blame me for the bleeding.

I'm so fractured it's become grey,
you think I'm ungrateful but I don't,
want gifts if it fueled their fights.

Their love and kindness,
is very selective.
I don't fit that category,
even if I'm their daughter.
Louisa Coller Jul 16
Gracefully tender in this world made timeless,
watering my roots when I was left lifeless.
Bloomed petals from your eye’s light,
twisting and turning to hold you tight.
In this moment, we smile for the righteous.
There has been some dark times for some countries in the last few years. I know for some, this isn't the way we wanted to see the world progress and grow. Amongst everything, people are hurt, regardless at the end of the day. Sweet, innocent and righteous people. There are days I can't even bare to look at the truth because of how bad it really has become for some - We can't ignore it though.

We were meant to build one another up and yet we drag each other down in the dirt over and over.

I love, applaud and praise anyone who does their best to stay light-hearted through the dark.
Louisa Coller May 12
You hold me in a cuddle, tight and warm. You hold me tighter than ever before.

We've loved, we've lost and left confused by who we are, but I know deep down, this is true love.
Louisa Coller May 12
You talk, you glow,
It's proudly put on show.
You wanted, you wasted,
It's perfectly translated.

I doubt my body and self,
Would you rather be somewhere else?
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