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hannah lace Dec 2020
i want to make you feel guilty
for changing your mind about me.

it’s not your fault that i am damaged
but it is your fault for how you acted.

it’s okay if you don’t want my body
because i’m not letting you anywhere near it.

*** with you is better as a concept anyway.
i wanted you but my trauma cockblocked. i’d still sleep with you if you asked
Andrew Rueter Nov 2020
There exists an area between hurt and healed called scarred
it's a place that isn't found—but revealed
tectonic plates protecting the core
my vibrating feet split the earth
forming my fault of separation
passive plains give way to cliffs and valleys
your seismograph detected  tremors
so you escaped to safer ground
outside my sightline from inside the trench emerging
memories are all I need to dig deeper
so remembrance goes through a grainy filter
glorifying the other side of my grave of grime
engendering assumptions of purity lying
beyond the fresh dirt door
where the undead hold their light sticks and disco *****
creating light without illumination
I stumble into them like a moth at night
bumping into the last vestiges of light
they say multiplying two negatives equals a positive
but this whole keeps going deeper
we just acclimate to the depths
making a competition of going furthest down
excavating our descent by expanding the division in the land
until magma erupts
lighting the voluminous pit
revealing the hell we've dug
trickster shadows dance along the sides
hypnotizing the feral demons staring
slack-jawed at the empty canvas of the cave walls
attributing the beauty of what they've missed to ghosts
telling ourselves our horns make us unique
until the lava starts burning us
as a reminder of humanity
continuation ensures incineration
yet this cavern has become my home
after convincing myself I belong here
so everybody hysterically huddles together
to protect themselves from the consequences
oozing from the pressurized center
I squeeze to fit into the middle of the crowd
putting bodies between myself and the nothingness that awaits
watching fellow spelunkers burn
while hoping the inevitable doesn't reach me
the liquid flame consumes my carcass
there's so many directions to fling the fire in
but I benignly accept my fate
knowing this is all my fault.
Grey Nov 2020
You are a lantern
And I am but a moth,
Gazing in awe at your beauty and welcoming presence.
As if in a trance, I draw near
And bask in your warm light
Too enveloped in your grace
To notice the corpses littering the floor.
You burn my once-gorgeous wings until I can no longer fly,
You sear my retinas so all I can see is you,
And yet I can’t leave, too reliant on your heat.
And just like that, a switch is flipped.
Your light goes out.
And I am left alone with only the wreckage you brought me
And the knowledge
That it’s all my fault.
7/21/2020
she swallowed her sadness
she told herself
that it was her fault
so why was she sad
it was her own doing
so why was she sad
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2020
Why am I never enough for you?
I try as hard as I can
Maybe it's my fault for thinking
You could be a different man

Everybody makes mistakes
That's what forgiveness is for
But the whole point of saying sorry
Is to not do it anymore

I know I hurt you in the past
So this pain is what I deserve
But how many times must you break my heart
Til my punishment is served?

I can't take the fear and stress
Inflating my insecurity
The worst part is you won't explain
What exactly is so wrong with me

What makes her worthy of your time
When we barely have any to spare?
How can you give her your attention
While I beg you just to be there?

Just when I start to trust you again
You prove it's all a lie
Acting like I am overdramatic
When your treason makes me cry

How would you feel if you read my texts
And it was other guys that I missed?
I'm pretty sure you would be scared
That we ****** or maybe kissed

What gives these girls a reason
To call you "love" and "babe?
Are they just misunderstanding?
Or are feelings taking shape?

I show the depths of my devotion
Treat you with acceptance and respect
Yet in return dishonesty
Is what I've come to expect

By now I've realized things won't change
You always convince me otherwise
And stop your games just long enough
For the next one to take me by surprise

Whether it's my fault for cheating
Or yours for not letting go
Bottling up emotions will never
Move us forward or help to grow

If it's revenge you're seeking
Do us both a favor
Get it over with already
And end this bad behavior

There is no justifiable excuse
For talking to others this way
After I clearly express disapproval
Behind my back you disobey

I would rather be even than live like this
One flirtation after the next
Never sure if you are where you say
Suspicious of each text

Tell me how to fix this mess
Mend wounds once and for all
I long for the intimacy we once shared
Before regret erected high walls

I'm sorry for what I've done in the past
But two wrongs don't make a right
I'm willing to keep giving everything I have
Just prove that it's worth the fight

If you have truly found a spark in her
That no longer exists within me
My selfish arms will not hold you back
I love you enough to set you free
Ugh I hate how jealousy festers in my intestines and burns my insides slow
Yanamari Sep 2020
Words fly on the whims
Of the tongue that speaks them
Like the flow of the wind that
Sways air to and fro
The air itself not as harmful as the
Wind that guides it and yet
The combination is the what carries
The perpetrators' knife through its victim

And there is no fault to the air
For the air did not create itself
And there is no fault to the winds
For the winds did not create itself
And their is no fault at all
Merely cause and effect;
The heart feels as it does
And morals sway with the wind.
Thinking back to times when I was experiencing low mood to a point where I couldn't help not expressing warmth towards a certain person even though I was more expressive with the other people in the same group which led to me being accusingly told words that felt a bit harsh, but I knew what the person was saying held some form of truth and yet couldn't help being the way I was. People say whatever they want, people perceive what others say as right or wrong, people feel differently towards the words of others. We are sentient. (Pers Ref.: UGDIRC2019)
Michael A Duff Aug 2020
Our love was an open book

It got dark and we lost our page

I really wanted to finish our story
Some loss is not anyone's fault but it can be just as hard to bare. Heartbreak is hard to repair no matter how hard or who or where... 78 to 64 just like that to 0
Esther L Krenzin Aug 2020
we are fish out of water
landlocked somewhere
we’d rather not be
and it is our own hands
that sew our gills shut
so that we cannot
b r e a t h e

Esther Krenzin
Storm Aug 2020
I wish I was a pencil
So that when I do commit mistakes
I can always try to undo

But I realized
I'd preferably be a pen
It cant be erased
but I can always thrive...

to correct it
Dont let urself be defined by ur mistakes. Always remember to make use of it as an avenue to grow and correct it. I know its hard to do but someday u'll realize that what im saying is true. DONT LET UR MISTAKE DEFINE YOU. Grow little seed
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