The songwriter tells it plainly
“Everybody wants to go to Heaven but, nobody wants to die”
That dark price we pay, to see Heaven
And what would I see, were I there?
The poets and painters have crafted a vision for me
Of white clouds and wonder
Of many warm embraces
In a place that is joy
Where time would not mark my shadow
Nor evil stalk my mind
Yet all artist imagery is of earth
And familiar places and things
But the inspired writing says
“Eye has not seen, and ear has not heard, neither has there been conceived in the heart of men, the things that God has prepared for those who love him”
For Lazarus did not report of Heaven
When risen from the dead
For it would have been unkind
To ****** him back from paradise
And King David did not enter Heaven
When he breathed his last
Yet if I should stand and gaze from Heaven's lofty heights
To that which lies behind
What peace would I find?
To see the world disintergrate
And dread and disease consume
To observe all suffering in an instant
And be powerless to intervene
To see my children toil
And age before my eyes
To witness war and want
Yet not to be able to extend a loving hand
To gaze upon the lonely billions
And the broken-hearted
For that is not paradise
That I cannot bear
And I decline the invitation
Heaven is not for the likes of me
For I was born on this planet
This precious home
Of colour and light
Of life and love
I would then plead
To spend eternity upon this soil
Even after death
For who could be happy in Heaven
When a promise of everlasting future is offered on this earth?
And I hear the sacred promise
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth, and they shall dwell forever upon it”
I will wait
I will sleep
Umtil He calls

I ran towards the door
not so they could let me inside
I pushed through the crowd
not so i could buy
I thew a coin to the wishing-well
not because it was a transaction
I said nice things to my reflection
not for him to  reply
I ran towards the door
not so they could let me inside
I wanted to feel the option
to be kissed by lips
not the curb of the pavement
I hoped I knelt I prayed
I never asked for a reality
just the right to dream
for a reason to live isn't needed
when i can make a million reasons not to die

You know the world is crazy
Is painful
Is cruel
When you hear
that a five year old's prayer to God
was to die.

When I was 12
I was hiking with my family, we sat on the edge of a cliff at the top of a mountain,
we were over looking the painted landscape

I remember looking at our feet in the empty air
and I asked my older sister:
“do you ever just want to jump..?”

She nodded and replied with:
“yeah shay.. :) I always wished I could fly too..”

and that is the first time..
that I realized that my head was different.

Because while she was
thinking of jumping to fly..
I was thinking of jumping to die..

and that’s when I started hiding my head lol
followed by a life of hiding self destruction.

And I guess loving you
became a habit, so here
I am trying to conquer it
but as they say,
‘old habits die hard’.

©Desired Dreamer (Bhupen)

Human greatest fear, is the unknown.
To not know, or unknown, is to not grasp.
Humans fear what they cannot control.
Death, is human greatest fear.

Under heaven, no mortal can resist death.
A king would be overthrown;
An emperor would rot;
The world extinguish;
The stars dim;
Such is death!

Death, tiny yet holds an endless profound mystery.
It cannot be held, cannot be touched, cannot be seen.
The dead cannot speak;
The living cannot see.
How could the living see the dead that cannot speak?

Death is the mother of life.
Close, yet so distant;
For deaths give birth to life;
Life, then give birth to death.

Death is the cause, life is effect.
Life is cause, death is effect;
Causality, difficult to grasp.

Mortal, who bears the spirit of the living;
cannot grasp deaths.
Mortal, who bears the spirit of the dead;
cannot grasp life.

Heaven lent you a soul, Earth will lend a grave;
All debt is paid without seeking to repay.
The samsara of life and death,
Who can escape?

The soul, are to return to heaven;
The body, are to return to earth;
Who can resist?
The evil is dreaded by men but not heaven;
Evil and right, no different in its eyes.