little
nugget, wide-eyed,
hairless, with red-faced wails;
you just ate - why are we awake
tonight?

When I was a Girl who's only super power was sleeping and crawling
My mother passed away
Left my father to raise two young children all on his own
He gave up everything for us
Sold the restaurant he had spent years saving to build
The motorcycle he swore would always be his
The one that set off car alarms and ******* neighbors.

When I was a girl who's greatest superpower was my ability to make imaginary friends
I thought my dad was superman
He fixed scraped knees
Fended off scary bugs
And beat impossible levels on video games.
I never realized it but he did more noble feats than kiss booboos and squish spiders.
Money never came easy to us, most of the time my father stayed unemployed so he could raise two children with love
Raised us on the retirement from fighting like captain America for our country

When I was a girl who's super power consisted of seeing the good in the world I always wondered why my dad didn't eat with us most days
Or why the lights sometimes went off
And water was cold
I know now that my superhero chose to pay for food for us over bills
And spread Mac and cheese boxes to last a lifetime
He gave up the comfort of food so we could have full tummies
And for that I'll always be grateful

When I was a girl who's super power was selfishness
I hoped for a mother
Wished on every birthday cake and shooting star
Praying to one day have a mom.
I paid the price for my selfishness
My wish came true the day my dad brought his new fiancé home

When I was a girl who's superpower was invisibility
My stepmother told me my mom never wanted me
Called her a useless **** head
And called me stupid.
I saw my father less and less
And At first he swooped in to save me from the wounds of her words.
But she stole his cape.

I am a girl with the power to masquerade as a woman now
And I speak only a few words to my father a week
My stepmothers words still wound me
But she is my fathers kryptonite
Stripping him of his powers leaving behind a tired man.
she has pulled our family from poverty and for that I'm grateful
But I'll never forgive her being the reason my fathers cape lay folded in the closet.
And every time I hear my father say he misses me it sounds like an apology for the last six years!
And when I say it back
I hope he can hear the begging to see him more.
My dad used to tell me he loved me every night before I went to sleep
Now we go days without saying it.
Without seeing each other
And now every time I hear it whispered under his breath as he gives a quick hug so the hulk doesn't see
It still sounds like the booming voice of the hero who carried me all the way home at three after getting stung by a wasp on the webbing of my finger and sobbing like I was going to die
And I feel the lump in my throat swell every time I echo it back like sonar
And can still see whisps of a cape behind him as he diffuses dr.dooms time bomb by saying the dish in the sink is his and sneaking me a wink.
I refuse to lose my dad to distance before I lose him to disease.

I am a girl learning how to control the power of the world around me
My father is dying.
Liver giving out from years of untreated disease after years of putting his health aside.
And he pulls oh his cape every time he smiles like a rain after a 100 year drought and tells me
'I'll be okay. You know I'm invincible.'
And I always say that I do forcing insincerity out of my voice.
I can see the weight of the cape he has worn for so long take its toll
His back is arching from the weight of having to be strong
A bulletproof savior of this family.
So I will take it from him.
Bear the burden of being strong and putting others needs before me.
I will shelter him under it whenever deadshot's bullets of insults come flying.
Because even though at times I thought I lost him.
With or without a cape
My farther is still my hero.

And I am a girl learning to be his.

Worthless
*****
Nothing
You are
NOTHING
Stupid little *****
You deserve to die.
I will break your popsicle stick wings
**** the light from your bright eyes
I will burn you
Rob your innocence
Decimate your soul
I will ruin you.
You will fear me.
Your legs will shake at the sound of my name
You won't be able to look me in the eye
But you will still come back to me
Always return to me
You will run into my arms
You will laugh
You will call me "Daddy"
And you will always
Always
Be my little girl.

Daddy, tell me why you smoke.
Do you like your future served in black?
Dead lungs and your body in a sack?
Your family crying and me in the back?

Daddy, tell me why you smoke.
Why are you letting toxic flow through your veins?
Do you like to grow old and be in pain?
You know you're walking down the devil's lane.

Daddy, tell me why you smoke.
I'm your little girl, do you even care?
Your poisonous smoke is all over the air.
Don't give me more burden than I can bear.

Daddy, tell me why you smoke.
Don't you know, don't you see what you're doing?
The time we're supposed to have is only fading.
Do you think a bright future isn't worth pursuing?

Daddy, tell me why you smoke.
Why are you killing yourself and dragging me along?
They say you're addicted, please prove them wrong.
I know you can do it, I know you are strong.

Daddy, tell me why you smoke?
I wish for one thing, and one thing only.
Tell me you'll quit and erase my worry.
And promise me forever I won't lose my daddy.

YOU TOLD ME TO CALL YOU DADDY WHEN WE ****** AND I BLEW OUT MY THROAT FROM SCREAMING ALL NIGHT SO YOU PUT YOUR HAND OVER MY MOUTH AND I CANT TALK TO MY FATHER ON THE PHONE ANYMORE

Daddy,
wasn't there to dry my eye
Daddy,
wasn't there to kiss my wrists
Daddy,
was the reason for my tears
Daddy,
was the reason for the blood
Daddy,
I give up on you
Daddy,
Goodbye

she's yelling at her reflection
as tears run down her pretty face
"you're happy, you're ******* happy"
she screams at the mirror
"you're ******* HAPPY
you have parents
and a home
a boyfriend
and a best friend
so what if daddy's packing his bags
and he's forgotten all the promises he made
and mommy's stopped talking
isolating herself from everyone
even her little girl
and that life under your roof is a living hell
because everyones coexisting
but no one speaks to each other besides over text
so what if your boyfriend lives miles away
you don't get to hug him everyday
it kills you knowing you can't hold him close
and that your best friend hasnt eaten in weeks
her hair's begun to fall out and and she's lost her personality
you have money and shelter and resources
you rich *****
BE HAPPY"

"I was really kind about it, I didn't lose my head or anything."
"See.. There's a difference between being nice and being a doormat. You have a tendency to treat others better than you treat yourself."
shrug*
"You say things to yourself that you would never allow someone to say about another person."

(an acrostic of 10W X 5 lines)

D-addy, like an idol, rarely closes his eyes...he is
A-lways patient...eagerly hears us...though tired from work, he
D-elights in our silly, lively, sometimes significant, or even stalemated
D-iscussions...he even joins in, and contributes to our childish
Y-abber........he's our idol...our friend...he is our DADDY!



Sally
Copyright June 20, 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan

He raised me the old-fashioned way
Never spared the rod
Worked daylight to dark
Except for Sundays
Never heard him say
His life was hard
Taught me to drive a stick
To hunt, to fish, to throw a lick
And how to take one

Good times fly by
Years fade away
Yesterday dies
Time cries

Daddy was a good ol' boy
I'm talkin' about them good ol' boys
They're the heart of the South
Them good ol' boys
Well they're about as good as it gets

He gave up all the boyhood dreams
And plans he'd laid  
So that I'd have some
Sometimes he'd speak and gaze
A glimpse of better days
Back on the farm
I can just see him now singin'
"Not Fade Away" and "True Love Ways"
There in the sun

Good times fly by
Years fade away
Yesterday dies
Time cries

Daddy was a good ol' boy
I'm talkin' about them good ol' boys
They're the heart of the South
Them good ol' boys
Well they're about as good as it gets

I carry his picture in my wallet
Together with his boyhood dreams
The picture is of him at 12 years old
My wallet's bustin' out at the seams

Time cries out for them good ol' boys
I'm talkin' about them good ol' boys
They're the heart of the South
Them good ol' boys
My Daddy was as good as it gets

Time cries out
For the heart of the South

Time cries out
For the heart of the South

Time cries out...
Time cries out...
Time cries out...

© Jason Cole