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Aa Harvey Jun 2018
Nothing like you


I would have liked to have been somewhere better with you,
But I just couldn’t care about anything that you do.
I would have liked to have seen something good inside of you,
But there is nothing there to find, so I will be nothing like you.


You know I hate to be the one to tell you,
Just how much I really hate you and everything that you do.
You make war, not love; with every fight our love is dying.
The two of us together should never have happened,
So why is it only me who seems to always be crying?


You are nothing like me in the love that I feel;
You feel nothing of the love that I have to give.
Your eyes are so wide open, searching for a way to be free;
Well there is an easy way to make you happy; go ahead and leave.


In this misshapen body, I am nothing like you;
In this beautiful mind, I am nothing like you.
In this relationship of lies, I am screaming the truth!
You are nothing like me and I am nothing like you!


(C)2016 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
It doesn’t matter.


Falling from the sky like a meteorite.
I’m losing sight of what might have been,
Because it has never been seen.
I have never had focus, because I never had to look,
For my inspiration, it rains down upon me;
So quick to admit defeat, so I throw away my books.
When I should be more promising,
No promise is kept,
Just swept aside and forgotten;
Until eventually I will have nothing left.


On a course towards love, it is my destined reality,
So I am waiting for a change of fortune;
I’m still waiting on reality.
No pop up picture book ideals, to be seen within my dreams;
Just reality biting me, it sinks its teeth in deep.
So no hope can I search for,
Because I know there is no cure,
For the lack of wishes I am granted;
Feet firmly planted, outside opportunities door.


No advance, no way;
Never been paid to read a page.
Never told there is a way, I just leapt into the future,
With a blindfold over my eyes;
I let the spirits take me over to the other side.


Somebody stole my bicycle,
So I could do with a lift to the next town over;
No time to look over my shoulder.
Eyes firmly fixed on what is to come;
I have already experienced a lifelong slump.
Now the curve is getting steeper and as I climb I do rise;
One hand upon the mountain top,
One more step to take into the light.


Find a word that rhymes,
Forever search for insight.
Stay locked inside my own slide show.
A film study, a flick book;
Life is just passing on by…


Without hope there is only loss;
I lost my hope a long time ago,
But the call of love is eternal,
So I will continue to scribble inside my journal.
One day somebody will find it in the rubble
And hopefully they will say,
He never stood still.


He kept on trying,
He kept on writing;
If only they knew how much more I need to find…
Pour all of your thoughts into my head;
There is plenty of empty space that needs to be filled.
I could never give you a reason,
So please stop asking;
I wish I could, I hope you will,
Pick up a pencil, pick up a pen;
Use a keyboard or a quill.
Speak a thought just once and they may like what you write,
Or they may think,
Well that was just a complete waste of my time.


An eclipse of the mind, wrestling with a need for a tongue twister line.
I need advice every time I make a decision;
Did I say that right?
Can you see where I am going or am I just losing you with my ways?
Shall I continue to say or just fade away?
Some people use a password as the password;
If you see this as just a blur,
Then you will never see the words that I am trying to say…
Would that it were.


Smash the glass, we are in need of an alarm,
Because as I lay here dying in your loving arms,
I’m spinning riddles around my ball of yarn
And nothing makes sense to the follower of patterns;
They could never understand that is does not matter,
If any of this even matters!


All that matters is the matter at hand we sit upon,
In the evening air, under this sunset sun.
This is not a perfect picture painted purposely peculiar,
It’s just a work of art or an apprentice piece.
A doodle or a riddle, a non-logical use of the vernacular;
It is only my dreams of an exploding star,
Scattered throughout the universe…

And that is all it will ever be.


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Sara Jun 2018
He works, and smokes, and skates a board,
finds every waking day a chore.
His dealer says he knows the score
-he'll have a 20s, maybe more.
Takes drugs so he feels less ignored
in social circles
acts the lord,
in every conversation, bored.
Since, of himself he's so unsure.
jaded
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
You never mind


Sign your name in blood, or just give up.
What it is you think you need, will never be enough.
Think for yourself or get some help;
Throw away all of your wealth.


Iron all your clothes; ***** it up.
Fashion is not enough to be just.
Say that you care; brush your hair.
Give no help when they need you to be there.


Stay locked inside; go out and hide,
From all the love you never mind.
If it’s enough, then give it up;
Love is just a ball of miss-trust.


Kick it out; hold it close.
Never believe, it’s time to go.
Hold it in; let it out.
Thoughts are never completely in the here and now.


Act on instinct; become extinct.
Pick yourself up or let go and sink.
Open door’s to other worlds.
Close your eyes to all before.


Never say what you mean;
Never say what is not clean.
Life is a dream; reality is only ever fantasy.
Pick a lock to their heart; open up and leave yourself starved.
Carve your names into a tree…
Are you exactly what you wanted to be?


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
A million more chances


Some people they get to live forever;
Some people do not have the same luck.
I want to go on until the other end of the never,
But fate has decided my time is up.


If only I had a million more chances.
A million more attempts to live life to the full.
Maybe I could find the antidote;
If only I could read every single book.


If only I could; if only.
Maybe I would not have to feel so lonely,
Because nobody understands the pain that is my life!
I am not and never will be ready to walk into the light.


My hope is in Pandora’s box;
I wish I could just pick that lock,
But I cannot, for the fear is too strong.
I guess this is my lot.


Exhausted from the thought of it all;
No key to be found to walk through a sliding door.
In a life so short, why was it all such a chore?
A battle for life; a love I never saw.
I only glimpsed at what could have been,
But now that desire has gone; I have lost everything.


I could never try, without somebody at my side.
I cry all the time, because all I want is a life
And a love life too; is that too much to ask?
Please do not take this all from me.
Please do not take it all back.


As the depression kicks in,
I sink into the abyss.
The loneliness of me, the pity, the lost wishes;
Let me live.
If this is what must be, then why must it be me?
I want to live, I want to live;
I want to be set free.


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Lacey Clark Jun 2018
Everything I did was viewed through the lens
of some sophisticated world traveler.
You really critiqued me, from how I got on the bus,
your eyes checking my intuition of how to stand while it moved,
seeing how I engaged in conversation with strangers,
scanning the clothes I've curated,
and gladly noting how "little I seemed to care about them",
chalking everything up to "american ignorance",
to scoping my bookshelf for your overrated preferences,
you are prying into my music taste,
my palette,
my body.

Meanwhile,
I get on the bus per usual,
wide stance to balance the stop-and-go motions,
I tell people have a nice day and make small talk about most everything!
especially the weather,
my collection of clothes is a museum themselves,
I care and tend to each piece carefully,
I think American's are happy-go-lucky double edged swords,
My bookshelves,
music taste,
pallet,
and body
are all full of volumes
unreachable by those who try to see me through
their narrow monocular.
i literally went on two dates with this man. don't suffocate yourself with your own point of view.
zb Jun 2018
my skin is blue with depression
my breaths are yellow with anxiety
i bleed red from anger
and my heart is grey with apathy

i love in chocolate browns
i hurt in deep maroons
i sleep with the deepest of blacks
i speak with the quietest of greens

my shame is pale orange
a sickly, strange color
it coats my fingertips
and it hurts to look at

my fear is a midnight blue
soothing in its constancy
it sings to me in the ruddy moments
it calms me during the greyest of days

my loneliness is a royal purple
in the paintings of my youth
it stands out
it overpowers all other colors

i live in shades of colors
together they paint a picture
of a person
or, a palette
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
Half-love


I am already halfway to loving you.
Halfway to the sky, you give me angel wings,
As when I see you I am floating on air.
I’m already halfway to loving you.


Say what you mean, it’s all music to me,
In the words that you speak, I hear poetry.
Forever I am falling deeper into you.
I would go to Timbuktu, if you needed me to.
For you, I would do.


Procrastination will no longer have its arms around me.
Apathy will no longer be my love.
Sadness will no longer allow me to share a house with misery.
You could become my life, as with you, I could be loved.


Love changes everything for me.
This time I hope the result will be different.
Surely it has to be…eventually.


(C)2018 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
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