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Jack Torrance Sep 2019
This ****’s been going on,
for far too long.
It took me talking to him,
to know something was wrong.

It started as a whisper,
so quiet and weak.
I could force it to silence,
without having to speak.

Then my mind and body,
started to waste.
He started to gorge,
and fell in love with the taste.

My slow decline,
was the foothold he needed,
and his tendrils grew,
where I didn’t know they were seeded.

His control grew bigger,
till it shadowed my mind,
and the whiskey fog I was in,
had simply turned me blind.

Then one day I was through,
enough was enough.
I was going to take control,
I had to be tough.

That was the first time,
that he spoke to me,
and that “no” was enough,
to finally make me see.

I tried and I tried,
again and again,
crying through his laughter,
trying to pour him out through a pen.

He was poison,
like a cancer you see.
He was killing us both,
but everyone just blamed me.

Then one day I realized,
I couldn’t get rid of that voice.
To do that meant death,
and that wasn’t a choice.

He’s a part of me,
but disconnected too.
A bystander to the hell,
that he’s putting me through.

Now every day is a struggle,
to quiet his voice.
Trying to convince myself,
that I do have a choice.

So he’s here to stay,
the monkey on my back.
The ominous stranger,
who calls himself, Jack.
We all have that voice, some are stronger than others.
Allison Wonder Sep 2019
Terrible the amount of anger spewed;
unrealized and uncontrolled.
Where honesty is meant to come off her tongue,
resentment instead is rolled.

Fighting to get through the pain,
trying to let people in.
But with lack of sauce to keep her sane,
irritability is sure to win.

Coming off as someone she's not
... what it takes to change,
I'm so ******* terrified because
to me that person is strange.
(c) Allison Wonder
2/13/19
M Aug 2019
Blend how I missed you,
Wished to sip you,
Whilst I was away.

In Singapore
you were no more,
and it ruined my ****** day.

But now I'm back
with you again,
In some ****** little dive.

You'll pour again,
Like falling rain,
My golden 285.
Lydeen Aug 2019
The temptation is always hanging over me.
A cloud raining pure amber liquid,
Calling with a siren sound.

"I'll help you forget"

"I'll help you be happy"

"We can have fun"

"Make you feel nice"

"Give you back your laugh"

"Take away the pain"

"Supplement the light"


The cold silence of the night makes my nightmares so much more real.

I am alone.


"Together we will be warm"


That's right.





We will be.
I am far too young to be a ******* alcoholic **** but I guess I was always daddy's little girl
AS Nilsen Jul 2019
all my favorite bars
remind me of old ship wreckage
blue bottled dry gin
courses through my Viking veins
I steer this helm with one aye
tired and depressed
lost and abandoned
no love
no hope
until one day i stumbled on a drink that made me feel alive
don't let the name depressant fool you
it slows my reactions the thoughts
the voices that tell me i'm worthless
alcohol was the solution i have been searching for
even better it was always there
always there.... and if i drink a little more the high lasts a little longer
i was all alone and hurt
until alcohol came and clouded everything
it was the escape i needed
and that is how i was made an alcoholic
i'm reading a psychology book.... i don't drink.
fm Jun 2019
what was it like when you left me behind?
with a bottle of jack clasped in your greedy palm,
did you ever look over your shoulder?
did you ever turn back?

independency never looked more like a cage
when you realize it came with
losing a childhood to a parent
dependent on *****
and lost in her liquor.

maturity is a sculpture that people
chip and mold to fit their own reality
when they forget that the
broken pieces surrounding the perfect sculpture
are really what maturity is made of.

when you left me behind
i reveled in my independency
and clutched my broken pieces in my hands,
glued them back together
and called it armor.

but i still wonder from time to time,
if you ever looked down to see your own
broken jack bottle
glass pieces by your feet,
because you finally remembered

that you left your daughter behind.
Gods1son Jun 2019
It's been a few years since you were gone
Your drinking habit those years,
I couldn't fathom
You downed every bottle and glass
that came your way until
you were down six feet in the ground
Anytime I think of you, I feel down
I wish I knew better at the time
Maybe I could have helped
It's heart-wrenching to remember that
alcohol took you away from us.
I trusted you with my life.
I wanted to hug you and love you and hold you tight.
You are like a sister to me, kind and fair but so naive.
You listened to the bottles hand, not the one who held you then.
Brother by love not by blood and a sister from a different neighborhood.
Hoping to see you live, laugh, and love instead of falling from far above.
Don't lose your chance to see success.
Don't lose your chance to be the best.
I want you to see the day when everyone shouts hooray to your name.
I want to watch as you hold your cap on graduation day.
You mustn't leave me, not for the glass of death.
Please don't forget me for the last taste that's left.
I will never forgive myself for the days I didn't see, the cries of pain that I feel were for me.
This world wouldn't feel like a home anymore, at least if I never saw you walk through my door.
I'd cry in pain and anger and fright, just please don't forget me after you take your last sip for the night.
Please don't forget me and don't forget yourself.
Please, Cate, please.
I don't want to lose you, I'd never forgive myself.
Mitch Prax May 2019
before the storm comes,
let us drown ourselves in gin
to survive the night.
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