The worst is when you fall in love and they don't with you
you heart feels crushed and not just split in two
you feel empty and worry that you'll never feel whole
for you loved them to the core of your soul

but I'm here to tell you that you don't need them to feel alive
you don't need that person you thought was perfect to survive
you are purely beautiful and enough on your own
so take a seat on your personal royal throne
don't search for love because all the love you need is from you
and once you start believing that i promise your dream love will finally come true

Sometimes I wish I could be dead
just for one day
to see what it feels like
to not feel pain in anyway
I want to know what it's like to fly
without the fear of falling
to just walk the streets like I'm invisible
without stopping for a second and crying
I want to see who would miss me
if I was dead and gone
would people cry and fall apart
or just laugh like nothing is wrong
would they speak kindly of me at my funeral
or would they speak a bunch of lies
would they curse my name in anger
or would they wish me back to life
Sometimes I wish I could wake up in heaven
just to spend one day with Jesus
just to talk to him face to face
and tell him about all of my problems
I want to walk with him in the clouds
and let out everything
then listen to his advice
on how to make my pain go away
if I could be dead for one day
I probably would want to stay that way
what I woukd give to be flawlessly beautiful
just for one day
to see how everyone would react
would they even care
or would they ignore my death like a penny
and pretend I was never there.

I promise myself,
that one day,
                            I'll get over you

That after that day,
                           You won't haunt me.

That after that day,
                            I'll be free.

The cage I locked myself in,
It'll be open

The best part is,
I won't lock myself in there again.

Guardians
Defenders
Angels
Shields

Some want to protect
Who they love
They aspire to greatness
Solely for another.

Remember that after a war
Shields are forgotten
And guardians
Are considered monsters.

I can still remember that look,
The one in your eye when you kissed me,
And the feeling of your hot skin on mine,
And the weight of your body on top of mine.

I can still remember that look,
The one you gave me when we first met,
Asking me why I was back a week late
After summer holidays.

I can still remember that look,
The one you gave me when you first asked me to dance- for a dare- when
We were in 7th grade.

I can still remember how my heart felt,
Like it was about to burst or melt,
Every time you spoke to me or included me, or maybe when I learnt you could play guitar.

I can remember almost everything since the day we first met,
Every interaction, every time I felt my love grow stronger, every little bit of heart break as you dated my friends on a weekly basis,
But most of all I remember when you kissed my lips, laying in your bed, and you said you could lay like this forever and we were in no rush…

we stargaze because we know the answers we need are not on earth

I want to fall in love with your words,
your smile,
your hand above mine.

I want to remember your eyes,
your body,
your favorite perfume.

I want to feel your breath in my neck,
my hand in your brown hair,
my lips on your cheek.

I want to know your fears,
you dreams,
your past,
talk about your futur.

I want to be your friend,
your lover,
the person you call in the middle of the night,
i want to be yours.