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Love Jan 2018
I've been breaking and breaking again and again,
carbon glass split into pieces,
I don't know where I begin or end,
my throat is clogged and choked,
panic flows with tears down my face,
I count down the hours,
body near the sickly,
no one will notice when every bit of glass is finally gone.
Love Jan 2018
I told you how I felt,
then you hung up.
Love Dec 2017
Your not feeling happy, but your smile turns genuine at the sight of him. Beauty in his laughter and smile. You know he's doing it for you so you echo it back for him. He needs some joy in midst pain. You want to be that joy.

But cracks surface and he takes it out on you. Lashes and lashes and lashes and gosd it hurts. Arguments hurt. Uncalled for words hurt. But the smile is fixed on your face. He doesn't want pain, he needs joy.

But he pushes you away, the same way you push away the ones you love to protect them from pain. He doesn't realise the pain intensifies when it's from him, or even though your powerless you want to take away that burden from his shoulders.

So you let it hit you, waves on waves, salt on open wounds waiting for the sting to cease.
Love Dec 2017
Red flags.
My mind flashes another warning,
not the first of its kind and hopefully the last,
it's a little push, I scream, he loves me,
but it's in bright red, warning.

Clingy.
Funny how the past haunts you,
how your so dependent,
you know it, a story told more than once,
everyone has their limit, you've hit his.

Words.
You don't want to say anything,
your mind is working to rationalise it,
he see's the look on your face,
insists on knowing every thought that crosses.

Spoken.
Pain laces your voice but cloak it with a smile,
the past is meant to stay buried but the pain is fresh,
open wounds and salt thrown in,
Seeking reassurance but meeting anger.

Leave.
Resolution is far, you see it as clear as sky,
avoid conflicts, leave before more than a fight occurs,
you love him, but he takes the first step to go,
you can't move but the call is urgent to go away.

Ache.
Conflict rages in your heart,
you remember red flags and you see them,
he shifts in mood, constant fights,
but love is still present in yours.
Love Dec 2017
I don't see the moon,
sky cloudless but no stars in sight,
mind emptied and hollowed,
too much on a plate that's too small,
disappointment written on loved ones.
Love Dec 2017
what a mess,
clothes stain rooms,
fingers blemish skin,
lies taint heart,
till everything falls apart.
Love Dec 2017
7
It starts as a crush,
A soft warmth of friendship,
then it feeds to an addiction,
a desire for more,
I think of his lips on mine,
of sinful things we could do,
but I hold back,
because it's not who we are,
he's pinning for another,
I'm with another,
so it's a dance,
devastation when we can't meet,
bliss when we do,
it's a dance,
urges to kiss in darkened corners,
alcohol lips on park benches,
blood, cuts and bruises,
till a bottle of wine is thrown in the mix,
and a dam unfolds.
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