As my casket fills with tears
I lye in my own sorrows
Slowly gasping for my last breath
As I drown in my fears

Nail this coffin tight
Bury it deep
Don't let my monsters
Get out and roam these streets

The river is a snake
Feeding off my mistakes
Lightnings storm
Slices the sky
Covering the sea in blood
The world in disarray
For all I have done.

The sea now as empty
Like the once filled heart
Now not whole

Clouds guard our souls
Locked in a sanctuary
Waiting their parole

Drown me- my fears
Guide me- my tears
Suffer no more
Deep in this hole

Give to me your knowledge
As I sit crossed legged
In the summers sun.

My palms are open
My mind cleansed free
Feel my love for you
Through my energy

Please help me heal through the pain
Cleanse my soul with your freshest rain

Help me see with your guided light
With strength in health of my mind

Mother please I beg of thee
For I am your son
And you I believe

Love is true freedom
And true freedom
Can never be bought

Her hand, open for love
Her heart, closed from fear

I told her, I loved her
With a tear filled eye.
I told her I needed her,
All she could say was, goodbye.

Mad - Donna
Once the laughter has gone
Turning her back
On a world so wrong  Once a sane life in this world
Took a turn, as a bullied girl
Mad-Donna
Escaped by popping pills
until they took her life
In the alleyway,
infected with chills

Mad-Donna sees
But not what the world may be
Through dilated pupils
And faded memories

Friends of then
Faces so thin
Like the dying soul
Trapped within

Mad-Donna, I wonder

Is it raining in your heart?
I see it pour out your veins
Is it trapped inside your mind?
These memories of insane.

Mad-Donna

Appears everynight
Her spirit of nature
Lives in the sky

The city's killing our earth
City the bullet
Earth our soul
Once where were rainbows
Now a killer roams

Mad-Donna
Once frightened
Now offer her hand
Invisible to some
Helping others understand
No need to see
Just feel
My child
For
Mad-Donna
Is an angel
For the wild child.

#poetry #poem #visonary #narrativepoetry #gbuda #writing #art #words #poet

Mad - Donna  
Once the laughter has gone
Turning her back
On a world so wrong

Once a sane life in this world
Took a turn, as a bullied girl
Mad-Donna
Escaped by popping pills
until they took her life
In the alleyway,
infected with chills

Mad-Donna sees
But not what the world may be
Through dilated pupils
And faded memories

Friends of then
Faces so thin
Like the dying soul
Trapped within

Mad-Donna, I wonder

Is it raining in your heart?
I see it pour out your veins
Is it trapped inside your mind?
These memories of insane.

Mad-Donna

Appears everynight
Her spirit of nature
Lives in the sky

The city's killing our earth
City the bullet
Earth our soul
Once where were rainbows
Now a killer roams

Mad-Donna

Once frightened
Now offer her hand
Invisible to some
Helping others understand

No need to see
Just feel
My child
For
Mad-Donna
Is an angel
For the wild child.

Fists fight
On words honor
Bruises heal
Both forgotten
In time

Guns fire
On words defense
Hearts and soul die
Both forgotten
In time

To someone I once knew
I never got to say goodbye
Yet you were still there
When I thought you had died

I tried, oh lord I tried

Did I disappoint you?
Did you care?
Did you have a choice?
I don't care

I just miss you
And need you back
To help me live again
Put me on track
To that once was strong man
Accepting any challenge he can

Oh I tried, oh lord I tried - I tried

Wonder
If you watch me while I sleep
Or hear me when I weep
Feel me clench so tight
All this wrong, so bad needs right.

I miss you, oh I miss you, lord I miss you.

This was not your choice
Nor was it mine
Was this your destiny?
Was this your time?

My sandcastle I built
Now disappears
With the tide.

I miss you, oh lord I tried, I miss you how I really tried.

To someone I once knew
To the old one who was true
How I need your strength inside
To put this cowering back in line

I miss you
Oh how I tried
I miss you
Lord, oh how I tried.

Moss covered land
Dreams the raven
Once owned by humans
Then destroyed by them

They took for granted
What was once beautiful, caring and understanding.
They let greed overrule kindness
And killed all that was good.

They polluted the oxygen
They use to breathe
The pollution in their water
Got millions ill
And killed off many species
Who relied for centuries on the ocean as their home.

Leading to their own demise
And leaving their mess behind
Leaving their destructive paths
For me the raven to now live
Abandoned and alone
With only a memory of once was
My mother.

The love I have for you
Is indescribable.
Your strength, your caring,  your being
You.
You are the one who brings me life
You are my whole.
The love I have for you
Is relentless.
Your beauty, your giving, your understanding
You.
You are my life
You are my heart
You are my soul
You are
My definition of love.

I judge you not from
Your past
I expect nothing from
Your future
I accept you
For the now
I live
For the now
I judge only
For the now
Never to compare
The past or present
To my now.

Living in my back pocket
Constantly snapping pictures
Of the insides of my jeans
Always auto correcting my ***.

Rhythmic beats,
Rain drops fall.
-listen to them all

Steady in pace,
Not missing a sound
Hitting my roof,
Hitting the ground.

Wind like an orchestra,
Howls from the side.
Rain crashing on my window
Like hitting a cowbells side.

Trees shaking,
As drops hit their leaves.
Making beautiful tones,
Sounds of tambourines.

Rhythmic sounds peacefully there
Painting pictures as I sleep,
All night I could stare.

Whenever I lose the sense to believe.
I just look around at all the people who support and believe in me.
Strength not only comes from your heart, but also the hearts of those around you.

Why?

For this world already has already witnessed to much hate.

With a dream filled flask
In an absent set mind,
His thoughts were at a stand still
-of time.

His beard long, matted and Grey
His thoughts old, fading, distant,
And aged.

His home was wherever he roamed,
His flask of dreams, is all he owned.

His well worn shoes covered his feet,
His abused heart, covered his sleeve.

I seen his blackened smile everyday,
Good morning, I'd reply as I walked away.

The same park bench every morning he'd lay.
Letting the chirps awaken his stay.

His name I did not know,
His life's road I did not know,
His morning story,
Was a man with a heart of gold.

When respect is gone
When the rules are no more
When martyrs have to win
No lives matter

When titles and ranks of authority
Are constantly attacked, and can be scrutinized for doing a service
No lives matter

When no one is there to listen, to help, to protect you
Then your life matters

Your life cannot matter
Without others lives
Lives keep balance
Just because there's disagreement
Doesn't justify irrational behavior
This only proves
No lives matter

Once we learn to respect all
Once we learn no one including ourselves are perfect
Once we accept violence is not an answer
Once we accept accountability for ourselves
Once we stop pointing guns and fingers at one another
Will we start to civilly start thinking
Of our actions and the price we pay for them
Then maybe then will
All lives matter.

The mirrors reflection
To find
What I've been searching for

Once darkness falls
is only when the eyes are truly open
Look to the moon
See your face in its light
Have a prayer?
We'll sing it to nature tonight
Once darkness falls

Once darkness falls
Suns rays turn to moonlight
Warm summer breeze
Turns to a cool nights wind
Happy thoughts,
turn profound
Once darkness falls
Is when I'll be found.

The darker the sky
Deeper the lie
Summers sun can't hide
The heartache inside
Once darkness falls

Rain mixes with tears
To help cover the fears
Unknown to most
yet so familiar to me
Where one can run and truly be free.
Once darkness falls.

Our eyes can only be expected to follow their minds dream.
They will get lost if the road is closed.

Doors open as I approach them
Slamming tight once passed
To assure they are closed, re locked
A one way ticket,
For a non stop journey
To keep moving forward

Locked behind are the doors
Once thought of never opening
Now are just past accomplishments
Never to be thought of our used
-again

Now knowing accomplishments come
With determination, and the strength of accepting challenge
I know I can, I will concur all my goals
Capturing dreams and building strengths along this very unstable, yet very rewarding road of life.

Little things like understanding.
once added together, can build a strength we never knew of.
Listening, before speaking.
Speaking in lyric of fact, not opinion.
All lead to a understanding.
A understanding of yourself, learning to accept truth and facts.
Learning it is o.k. to not always be right.
Learning it is o.k. to listen, absorb and give benifits of doubt, when necessary .
Let go of the angered pain,
Let go of the ego, of having to be right.
Understand, we all have the right to an open ear, from the open mind.
Theres a thought,
that enters my open mind.
Stoping the hate,
That fills my worlds time
Enter-
happiness
Stop-
in time
Understanding,
yours and mine.
Stop,
the time.
In a still second pace.
Holding time, briefly
To see, it's beautiful face.

To this thought,
That has entered my mind.
That gave me clarity,
For a still second of time.
I thank you,
my soul,
For allowing me to see,
A more loving world,
Where we all
can be.

Time does not stand still,
I know.
If it could,
this is it's second, I would choose.

My wish for this same second-
To freeze in time.
For each, and every soul
To smile, in harmony.

For everbody to feel
The warmth from happiness.
For everyone to see.
If we all work together,
A smile for one second,
We-
Can radiate a new born love.
For ourselves and each other.
All unite as one,
Where-
All are sister's and brother's.

When you strive on speaking nothing but
Truth.
Yet accept someones blatant lies to avoid
Confrontation.

The wind blowing so strong that day
It violently tore the page of ideas
From my notebook.
Now they're just thoughts
Traveling through the sky
To be forgotten.

The world - our window
Its people - its soul

All people - together
For our strength - to grow

Hearts - warm as sun
Oxygen as important - as the soul

Take my hand, we'll be the bees
Polenated with love
Spread with a sneeze

Like a wild flower in the snow
Any where- our love will grow

Making a land of all colors and blooms
Where we all live as one
Where being born is our only due.

To rise yet again
But how high will I fly
-This time

Coals of the ashes
Stay at a simmer
Awaiting my return

A constant failure
Of minimal victories
Is this man behind these flames
Of laughter.

To crash and burn
To never learn
Never to learn
When there are no lessons learned

Rise to victory
In flames of glory
The pain is burning

Wishing the pain to go away
Cool waves of air
Blow out the flame

Killing the body
Yet leaving its soul
Sending it back,
To the coals below

I am a imperfect person
I have flaws, I am impolite at times
I am flawed in every definition of the word.
I have scars deep in my skin
From fighting and acting the ways I once did
I have scars from surgical problems and pain
I cover them with ink from a needles name.
I am just a poet, being wise or a sap
Dosen't matter much anymore put my story's in a sack.
Mix my words and my memories thoughts
Put together my poetic life
Being a poet is tough.
I won't lie, or let you down
I will write my life
Until
In my ink I drown.

The poets battle field
Loaded pens of ink
Spraying their letters
into words of fire
For others to see

Forming alliances against one another
Challenging each
For the words they speak

Paper once used as a poetic escape
Now obsolete
It's fragile thin yellow and torn
Once strong words read
Now bleed through
To barley to be seen

Few poems escape from papers demise
To the computers screen
Laid out perfectly to be seen

Poetic communities
Welcome your find
To control your poetry
To change your mind

Poets captured
By their words
Being read, held hostage
Their thoughts above their head

Gang violence erupts
Killing once were words
Replacement of misspelled
And a mis lead art

Words verse emojies
Covered in slang
Raising white flags
Crawling back
To note books they hang.

Poetry *****!
It shows my vulnerability!
It shows my compassion,  my understanding.

Poetry *****!
It let's others like you know I am human.
It shows you I'm sensitive,
And come with not only my arms, but also my defenses down.

Poetry *****!
Even at my weakest times,
Even while completely open.
My strengths shine through,
Showing my real side,
Darkness and light, that I just can't subside.

My thoughts in this fierce world are to brutal in truth for the Lions den to handle.
Your facade gives you weakened followers who know no better.
When the thinker speaks and followers listen, then this is when the truth becomes feared.
The truth begs and makes you not only see, but face the reality, the reality which you fear so deeply, the reality that you can not see by your own.
This is a brain washed society,  with few hopes nowadays.
Don't be a follower,  don't feed this negative energy being used to shut out hope for a better you.
We need encouragements for our selves, our lives, our strengths.
To believe in our soul and speak only with our heart shows the greatest of all beings, a true being.
We need not the "fear to think" we need to display our thoughts and need to fear the resentment towards a free thinking society before it is too late.  Please help show others there is hope and it is never too late.

Reading through my archives
Of life
On little pieces of paper, napkins and fast food wrappings.

I came upon a note to self and proceeded to read it.
It was dated a year ago and the time was "way past closing time"
So I figured it must be good.
It said "dear self your work ***** and is to short lengthen it!"

At first I was taken back at how angry I was at myself, but then remembered how my readership had been slowly decreasing.

I decided to listen to this old drunken "wisdom" of mine and lengthened many of my works.

I actually didn't think they were to bad either, until I posted them and only got few comments with no likes.
The comments read "your poetry is to long and boring" "what happened to your short blunt to the point fluency? "

That's what a get for listening to the drunken me and taking advice from a fool.

Critics are fine, but bad comments can hurt a guy.
Guess I'll go back to my usual writes with my slowly dying off fan base for a few praises to brighten my ego for however long this three line poet has left in this field of potholes and hand grenades.

If you believe as I do,
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Then we need to believe,
In loving ourselves truly.
Once this love is unconditional then
May we let our light shine beauty
To the world.
Hoping soon for all to follow our footsteps.
Planting the seeds of kindness and enriching our universe/soul, for the most brightest of days ever witnessed by one's eye.

Seeing your thoughts
In my mind
Ugly in words
Changing in time

Once I knew you
Thats gone now
A newer version
Bow to the endowed

Like the wind
My once knews came in life
Like the blowing wind
It all changed
Like the turn of a dime

Thought I knew, of all you are
Til wind of change
Blew us all to far

Change if life
Like the turn of a dime
The mirrors an ugly reflection
Once it stops  its shine.

Bred as a whole
Ripped apart as new
Split in diversity
Walking in distance
As two.

Searching, and it may never stop
For if it stops then you simply have failed.
Purpose
Purpose reformed
For we cannot deliver performance once we stop to search
Is the search over?
Without search once purpose is found is the time to deliver our performance in lewd of getting the message.

Have you ever waited
for a storm?
Have you ever seen
darkness form?

Have you ever seen
the brightest of days,
Quickly turn,
Its light to grey?

Have you ever
Stood in the eye of storm?
Waiting  for its power
Wanting the rain to pour?

The darkness, breaks our silence
We sometimes hold so long
Until,  thunders warning
Brews a untamed storm.

Our bodies, our universe
The sun, be our heart
The weather, our emotions
Waves of love hate, do part

Darkened clouds of despair
Words so thunderously shared
With warmth of the sun
Once in lived the heart
Replaced  pasts memberance
With tears, to a new start.

With love now scorn
New life is born
The collision of love and hate
Create the perfect storm.

Our eyes can not follow their roads dream.
When the road is closed,
The road begins in the mind.

Out side beauty catches the eye.
While inner beauty,
Captures the soul.

Sometime's the truth is brutal on us, especially when it comes from our own voice.

Tears fallen from clouds
Down the face of the sky
Darkness there back round

The rumble of clouds collisions match this skies color
Deep, dark and intimidating

Why is there no sun shine?
Has it gone?
Or is it the menace behind this chaos?
The menace of the summers storm.

Who brought upon this dreadful dark encounter, of a summers day?
Pondering as I lay in my yard looking upon this storm.

My thoughts of how we all need water to survive help me
Realize this is nature surviving.
So I thank you mother earth for feeding your children
Whom brighten my everyday.

The sun hasn't gone away
It is helping the clouds feed our trees plants and flowers
To help them strive in its light.

And the darkness is beautiful  as well
For without it we could never stare at the stars to dream.

The truth may hurt
Only if we listen
Will we be free

To rise yet again
But how high will I fly
-This time

Coals of the ashes
Stay at a simmer
Awaiting my return

A constant failure
Of minimal victories
Is this man behind these flames
Of laughter.

To crash and burn
To never learn
Never to learn
When there are no lessons learned

Rise to victory
In flames of glory
The pain is burning

Wishing the pain to go away
Cool waves of air
Blow out the flame

Killing the body
Yet leaving its soul
Sending it down, to the coals.

Sadness from my eyes

Talking to the stars
Only caused jealousy
Between the moon and I

Sacred be thy name
Unharmed, untouchable, unseen
Protected by God
Respected by all
Sacred be thy name

Once wishing for peace,
Now, living peace
Eternal -definition of peace
Sacred be thy name

Living in damnnation
To create a new nation
To give a once blinded society
A gift, to see the world
With true sight.
Sacred be thy name

Not holy, not war
Nothing to fight for
-anymore
No more harm
Respect all as beings
Give us all a chance to be heard
once we are able to see
Sacred be thy name

Sacred be our name
All as one, for one honor
of each other, for each other
For our mothers,  for our fathers
Sacred be our name

I drain these once were words
Turned to thoughts.
From my pen, to paper
Yet you still refuse to read them.
As my pen ink drys
And tears subside.
Thinking this road,
Has come to an end, for tonight.
I swig my whiskey,  
Stare in my mirror,
Are you going to let them stop you?
All of your fears?
I curse to God, for he's  the only one who cares.
Light a smoke, as it rolls to my eye
The last of my ink, in my pen has died.
These words are no good,
Yet these thoughts, must be read.
I must carry on,
The message in my head.
I grab my worthy pen,
"Let's make history my friend "
Jabbing it's point to my heart
Filling it with my thoughts,
Torn apart.
Now I will write in blood
My thoughts of strength flood
My mind sets free
As my heart still bleeds.
Dying slowly, I smile
Finally you see my style.
Read these words, of once was I
Then burn them with my soul aside
Set them free to the sky
Scattered ashes, say goodbye.

Trapped in the middle of a forest.
Nowhere to turn,
Nowhere to run.

My feet, soft in sand.
Stuck, unable to move.

The leafs are falling on my head,
Down my face, like dusty  tear drops.
Rustling and crinkling,
Like some kind of uneasy sadness.

Crashing are, the now naked trees
As now they are screaming,
Screaming, for me to leave!

CLICK,
CLINK!
CLANK,
CLICK!

Leave my turf!
Warns the ornery tree.

I try to leave,
But each movement I make,
sinks me deeper,
into the ground.

Quick sand, this must be!
As I am sinking more deep!

Now, up to my neck
In the thickest of muck.

The trees still clicking,
Clanking so loud!
Sounding as if they were chanting a sacrifice.
Taunting me, challenging me,
Watching me whimper, for life.

CLICK!
CLINK!
CLANK!
CLICK!

The leafs,
Continue to fall upon my head.
One by one,
Driving me mad!
Like a mid evil water torture,
On my mind!

Is this to be my final destination?
My falling?
The heavier my thoughts - it seems,
The deeper, I sink.

The deeper I sink,
The more I think,
The heavier I think,
The more I sink.

As the deeper I sink,
The deeper I think.
This may be,
Is this for me?
The possible end of my time?

The more I think,
The deeper I sink.
Thinking, knowing, understanding
This is not the possible end of time,
But this is the ultimate,
end of my time.

The end of time,
All my goodbyes,
Sinking, thickening,
Deepening, in time.

Deeper and deeper,
Dark and deeper.
Until once, all my light, has gone.

All light, has gone,
Turned away, turned away
Blackened my sight,
Stolen my day.

Ended now,
my life.
In this forest of prey.

Thank you my body for working so hard.
For trying to regain bits at a time rebuilding so much lost.
Thank you my soul for being so strong, sticking through the grim and never changing who you are.
I'm feeling like myself again more and more each day. I feel as if I have a redo for a normal life, and may be me again.
Times won't be perfect,  this I know. I will accept this life and take its blows.
Days will be longer, and more filled with joy.
Thank you God and my universe for your help through this chore.
For helping me see light, when once I thought there was no more.

Self appreciation-
Poetry is like the soul
The soul being a bird
A Bird singing in it’s field,
Carrying it’s wounded heart
Across a bare land of hope
In search of it’s dreams.
As a blind man,
can hear every note from the bird precisely and accurately.
A deaf man can see all her beautiful vivid colors in her feathers.
Trying to build strength along they way Not to lose faith On each of their hardened journey.
Facing the reality of each their own dreams truth, One on one.
Taking the time,
Looking in their minds mirror,
Giving thanks to their soul’s For the life it has given to them.
Thanking their life for Building a complete fulfilling memory Of accomplishing the greatest of ones deepest sincerities in goals.
-Pure Inner Strength