my bones are slowly          
                              b  r  e  a  k  i  ­n  g
                                              a     p     a     r     t
without your T  O  U  C  H
to hold them together.

your lips sealed my fate like g l u e
my body is     s    t    u    c    k
waiting and
waiting and
waiting and
w a i t i n g

for you to come back and fix me

i am not the kind of sick
that leaves the body flushed
at 104 degrees
in the middle of the winter.

                                                               ­                  i am not the kind of sick
                                                            ­                         that causes every breath
                                                          ­          to force
                                                           ­         its way

                                                               ­    back up

                                                             yo­ur throat
                                                          ­             while dragging razor blades
along the inside of your neck.

                       i am not even the kind of sick
                       that comes with a vaccination
                                  or an antibiotic
                            that will chase it away.
no.
                                                                ­                          i am the kind of sick
that leaves you locked in
the bathroom during class
because you can't seem to stop the
             flow of tears
                       running
                               down
                                     your face.

i am the kind of sick
that leaves your hands
sweating
and your voice
shaking
when it's your turn to order dinner
at the diner you've been to
a thousand times.
                                            
                                             i am the kind of sick
                                         that leaves you feeling

l o n e l y
                                              in a crowded room
                                           filled with the people you've
                                           known your whole life.

i am the kind of sick                                                                  ­                                that nobody sees
                                        because it's all in my head
                                      and cannot be cured.

happy
skinny
lovely
kind
strong
brave
pretty
sweet
smart
creative­

yours.

sleepless nights
sleepless night
sleepless nigh
sleepless nig
sleepless ni
sleepless n
sleepless
sleeples
sleeple
sleepl
sleep
slee
sle
sl
s
sl
sle
sl­ee
sleep
sleepi
sleepin
sleeping
sleeping a
sleeping al
sleeping alo
sleeping alon
sleeping alone
sleeping alone.

I wonder if I'll ever know what it feels like
to wake up each morning
to a life
that's actually worth living.

It's funny how easy it has become
to break someone's heart.

Mere seconds of fingers flying across a keyboard
is enough to shatter their world,
and the only warning they get is
three little dots...

Then there's nothing but silence...
and they're left to pick up the pieces
of the cracks that go deeper
than just the screen.

Cracks that can't be fixed by a kiosk or by mail-order replacement.
No. These cracks...
                                                                ­             they're permanent.

If you could
be anything or
anyone
in the world-
Why wouldn't you be
you?

she was not broken like the rest of us
her brokenness was all her own
and she didn't know what was scarier-
                                                        ­ being different or being alone.