It's hard to imagine anyone loving me
Especially
When I hate me so completely
I'm sorry
But if I have to love myself
In order
To feel love from anyone else
I might as well put myself on the shelf
Out of reach from everyone else
I'm afraid love will never win
It's not as easy as just letting it in
I have to keep battlin'
Just to keep from drownin'
Due to a timeline filled with so much abandonment and rejection
Over and over and once again,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry my sorry means little to nothin'
My devotion didn't start out this thin
This is the outcome of both creation and evolution
Going head to head,
And coming out in the end,
As a problem with no solution

©2024

Open up you say
Sure,
I'd love too
If even just for a little something new
A simple change of view
Although to keep this bit of honesty true,
I should tell you,
I don't necessarily care for this solo walkthrough
I'm a little tired of the empty echo in this venue
But,
Allowing someone in isn't worth another self worth issue
See,
One can be a lonely number, but so can two

©2024

Love and hate
Neither pose a challenge to fate
What even is there to debate?
Prove one is far stronger than the other
Go ahead,
I'll wait right here

©2024

Forever counting sheep,
Gotta be up to infinity
I'm sure though,
Any day now,
I'll get to see what my dreams might be

©2024

No minds eye
No dream of a brighter night sky
No minds eye
Trouble seeing through most any lie
No minds eye
A lack of one inside but yet I still cry
Can't go face to face or eye to eye
How friggin' broken am I?

©2024

•••
Welcome home
•••
Heart of stone
House of glass
Fault is not mine alone
Karma credit blown
It happens fast
With no receipt shown
The last to know
A forced outcast
I didn't get here on my own
A house of glass
And a single stone
Another broken home
•••

©2024

I melt like ice on a hot plate
Like a candle to a flame
All I know is pain
Though it now sits as an unforgettable stain
The receptors were never meant too sustain
The onslaught like constant rain
Proving to be too much to maintain
I now feel nothing,
Teetering on the cusp of insane
Not unfamiliar terrain
I recognize fears domain
Spent a lot of time on that plane
Where a single step forward is a strain
And one look back can reattach the chain
Scars from a dangerous brain
Are the only parts of the original me that remain
If need be,
Look for my face in the wood grain

©2024