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Nyx Aug 2018
Break and tear at my skin
Pull down the covers
Reveal my true sins
I'm not a real lover

Chip at my fortress
That I've build high in the sky
Knock down the door
Its within there I hide

Fight the dragon
That stands in your way
Pass by him with ease
As he's quite easy prey

Scale to the furthest tower
Within there I lay
A lonely girl hiding
This is where I stay

The walls mean nothing
Nor the doors that are bolted
That dragon so fierce
Is weak though devoted

Its easy to break through
Its simple to get in
But the real question is
How do you win?

The real challenge wasn't
The doors and the riddles
It was whether or not
You could cure me, even just a little

To rid me of this curse
Lay upon by a witch
To forever feel this loneliness
Though I am a complete *****

So tell me darling do you know
The way to set me free?
Or will you be like the rest of them
If so, go on and flee

I'll stay in this tower
Dont you worry
You weren't the prince for me
I know that the truth is that I'm the one
The only one who can set myself free
Nyx Oct 2018
A thousand petals
Flow through the sky
Gracefully floating
In and out of sight  

Behind the walls
Of roses a gleam
A labyrinth awaits
Filled with the wildest dreams  

Clicking of heels
Running upon a stoney little path
He's calling your name
Simply follow along the footpath

You can see his smile
As he turns another corner
Ever so slightly out of reach
Keep going you're getting warmer

The sun streams down
Following at each turn
It seems so hopeless now
But determination is stern

He's teasing you
You can hear his voice in the wind
Like a mere whisper by your ear
Its drawing you in

To a place that you thought
Was only within fairy tales
And finally you reach him
Taking in all of the details

Capturing this moment
Like a photograph and image
Forever engraved into your mind
You can hear them all saying

Love can be blind

Forgetting the past
History of you and him
He's the one you want
Even if all odds seem dim

In the moment you let him hold you
Gently within his arms
And you truly believe then
He could never do you harm

Though when the world seems to fade
And you've been hurt time and time again
You're willing to believe anything
Allowing yourself to fall victim to sin

But in this rose filled garden
Where the sun is beautifully bright
You forget about the reality
And allow yourself to bask in the light  

Closing your eyes
Here he's standing handsome and tall
But when you open you're eyes
There will be nothing at all

Within this Rose Filled Garden



~
Nyx May 2022
The world grows lonely as the years go by
Where all the people around you begin to die
But not in the sense where they leave this earth
They just seem to move on to places like Perth

Some seem to smile brighter surrounded by glowing lights
Dancing in clubs, from night to night
From drink to drink to pill to pill
Doing lines off the bench, as pupils widen and fill

Lighting cigarettes in cars, Enjoying the green
Filling cars full of smoke, like young kids of eighteen
Eyes reddening and glazing, Fading out of this zone
As the concept of time becomes blackened and unknown

Some are passionate and driven, working harder each day
Building businesses and plans, so they can achieve something great they say
Counting up budgets, preparing their lives.
They are people who will succeed, not just survive

Others are married, having kids, and Starting their happiness off young
Though many think they are making mistakes, but they hold their tongues
Time move on, and people are getting engaged
Whatever feels right to them I think, regardless of their age

As people choose their lifestyles, and none of them suit you well
It's hard to find a crowd that won’t make you feel like hell
The world feels lonely as time passes, You feel like you're all alone
When people don’t message back, or check on you over the phone

People you called friends move on, as do you
But I can’t seem to find a rhythm, I can’t seem not to feel blue
I feel empty on the inside, and envy those who know what to do
Jealous of their smiles, as they always have something new

Feeling lost and outdated, In this forever changing life
Maybe if I begin to work harder, take up partying, or become a wife
Will this feeling go away, Will I stop feeling such strife
As the loneliness eats away at my energy, cutting deeper than a knife

The world will keep on changing
I know at least that is right.
Just some thoughts and feelings I have, as I'm getting older and everybody moves on with their lives and people don't make time or have the energy for you. It can feel so lonely sometimes.
Nyx Sep 2019
Her worth to you is far greater than mine
And perhaps her love for you as well
You tell me I'm yours, this is true
But these thoughts weight down on my mind

Names flash across your screen
I wonder who it could be?
Heart pounding with curiosity
Though I dare not take a peek

Blind my eyes and close my ears
Don't think too hard, it'll bring you to tears
Though I've seen those pictures still online
And I hear those whispers that are said so carefully

Almost as if they are afraid,
Of c r u s h i n g my heart


With words of comfort, he tells me silence
"You are wonderful, You are beautiful "
But the voices that scream tell me otherwise, crying out
Y O U  W I L L  N E V E R  B E  E N O U G H

Even if my heart is riddled with fear
Inferiority to the girl who once stood
I'll try my hardest to live up to her
To receive the same love and the same worth



But still.... it hurts


-
It just be like that sometimes
Nyx Sep 2018
If I were to scream out all my thoughts
All my insecurities and feelings

Would you hear me?

If I were to wipe away this facade
To reveal my raw emotion

Would you be willing to see me?

If I were to stop putting you first
To stop giving you my everything in exchange for nothing

Would you still be with me?

If I were to break open my heart
And give you my love and affection

Would you love me back?

If I keep giving and you keep taking
An never ending cycle

Would I have anything left?

And when finally I have nothing else to give, and u have nothing else you want

Would you still be standing here holding my hand?
Or would you just leave me behind

I wonder
Would you be any different from the rest?
You
Nyx May 2018
You

You look at me through those clear blue eyes
Smile at me with that cheeky smile
Hold me close at each event
Tell me goodnight at the days end

I fell in love, lay my heart out bare
You took it from me without an ounce of care


You make me laugh with all your jokes
Giving me hope by being close
Allowing me to feel like i was number one
Giving me the pleasure of being the only one

Love can be blind, I soon came to know
That your love for me was merely a joke


You flirt with other girls with me standing there
Threatening the people who simply cared
Burning my bridges as I watched and stared
Losing my freedom as you became my air

My entire life, You made it devine
I became your, but you werent ever to be mine


You left me to fend for my own
Ignore me, leaving me all alone
Acting like you dont know who I am
Making me feel like your love was just a scam

By the end of our story,
I lost who I am, I cut off my friends
Forgot where my priorities stand
I allowed a boy to take over my life
As i took his words to heart
Even though they cut through me like a knife
I don't regret what happened
Nor the sacrifices I made
My only regret is that you left completely unscathed

I love,
No.
Loved you

So don't you forget
That i'm the one you broke down
The one that you left
The one who followed you to the bitter end
That I was your last standing friend

After everything thats happened
I've finally had enough
Nyx Jun 2019
Even after all this time
I still dance around the room
Attempting to catch your eye
While Subtly following you with mine

How desperate
Nyx Sep 2018
You know....
I've changed in these past months
I didnt think you would notice
My speech and personality has escalated
It seems I've lost my focus

I'm empty from the longing
The airy feeling left in my chest
I'm speaking to you with no feeling
Surely I would jest

Its scary to think how much I cared
Everything I sacrificed
All the things I did for your sake
To think I was satisfied

You were like a sweet chocolate
Melting on my tongue
Only to reveal bitterness
Which kind of stung

I can't say I regret it though
Giving you all my time
I would do it all over again
Even if my love isint worth a dime

You know...
I've really grown
Since you left me here alone
I've managed to take your lead
But my sins will not be atoned

Now if I could really go back
I dont think I could
As I have friends that love me now
Life right now is good

I learned from you
And what we had
I noticed now
That our relationship was bad

You know...
Thought its labelled like that
As toxic and deadly
I still loved every moment
You were the first to hold me steady

The first to make me feel such want
intoxicated by the love we had
Drunken off our hearts beating in sync
Even if that was what caused us to sink

We sunk into the depth below
Further down then any man was willing to go
Freely falling into timeless space
throwing away the cruel reality that we both refused to face

You know...
By our ending
Where our ties became undone
Our final page was turned
And the ink had run to none
I loved you

With everything I had
I counted the Stars
Praying for a wish
a wish for eternity to be like this

Though silly wishes that are made upon stars
Dont last for eternity
And they tend to leave nasty scars
Though you left me
My feelings never changed
Even if the curtains have fallen upon the stage

You know....
The play does go on
Nyx Mar 2018

The Two of us had a interesting start
It began in a peculiar way
Our gazes met from across the class
A stupid look glued on my face
An amused grin took over you
As I realised my fatal mistake
My best friend was sitting next to me
Laughing and beginning to shake

Walking out of class together
You still thinking it was great
Don't tell anybody what you saw today
I tried to keep a straight face

Imitating that dumb look
That you saw upon that day
Every time we glanced at each other
You would pull that ******* face

Weeks pasted by and you continued
Playing the same old game
But slowly we talked to one another
and eventually a friendship came

You had walls that I smashed down
Breaking down each one
At first you knocked me back
And you were an absolute ****
Insulting me and pushing away
as if a child who didn't want to play  

But eventually you grew close
And slowly opened up
It made me so **** happy
As if I were a playful pup

A year flew by quite quickly
And we had a strong bond of trust
Telling each other everything
and I helping with your crush

But there came a day where it stopped
And things began to change
You began to ignore me completely
And i found it particularly strange

I saw that I was replaced
I saw that look on your face
This one you treated differently
and my whole world began to change

Through now I know better
You sold me a lie
A lie that you attempt to keep
You're still trying to act quite sly

But now I've left you within the past
The boy who use to make me day
I've found people who love me dear
I'm no longer willing to be your prey
Nyx Aug 2018

You told me
Take my hand
Close my eyes and jump
Taking a leap of pure faith
Landing with a gentle thump

You told me
I'll teach you how to fly
Soaring high above the clouds
Far away from this little town
To a place you can stand proud

You told me
I will love you forever
Building a life of just us two
A fabricated lie so sweet
But from the beginning I always knew

You told me
Trust in me
I would never betray you
Oh how I wish those words were true
I held such hope but you never seemed to come through

You told me
I will give you the world
Every single piece of you too
But clearly the world you speak of
Is a creation of pure taboo

You promised me
So very many things
But all I ever wanted
Was to spread my own wings

I wanted to fly
With you by my side
Just as you promised
But its okay that you lied

You gave me hope
Where all seemed dim
You were my light
No matter how grim

And so I told you
Goodbye my friend
Through a roaring storm
Casting away the skies
This is where our tragic love
Dies.
Nyx Sep 2018

You were
Poison coursing my veins
Rope around my neck
A Bullet to my brain
Leaving me in a wreak

You were a
Cold blade to my wrist
A sweet gentle kiss
Hard hitting fists
Bruises were hard to miss

You were
Sunrise at dawn
Fresh flowers in spring
Stars glistening in the sky
A beautiful diamond ring

You were all these things and more
Everything I desired
Your beauty was intoxicating
A deadly taste I had acquired

I miss you

I know I'm better off without you
As your love was killing me slowly
Though I reminisce of that ever so sweet venom
That drew me in so closely.
Nyx Apr 2018

You would think I would learn my lesson
That I wouldn't be such a fool
You would think after the first time
That I would know and follow the rules

You would think that a heart like mine
So tormented and broke
You would think that a boy like him
Wouldn't take it as such a joke

You would think that the friends around me
Would learn not to be so fake
You would think that I would figure out
That I can't change a snake

You would think things will change
We will become more mature
You would think that high school drama
Is something anyone can endure

You would think that since I am a child
My opinion are completely invalid
You would think that as a full grown adult
That everything you say is valid

You would think that as the years fly by
We could learn to love one another
You would think that as the world moves on
We wouldn't care about skin colour

You would think that since its been so long
That women have equal rights
You would think that with all the new changes
That the LGBT could finally sleep at night

You would think that due to the history of the world
That we wouldn't have bloodshed or war
You would think that we would learn more morals
that young girls wouldn't be labeled as ******

You would think that since everything we've been through
No matter how big or how small
You would think that since our world is so advanced
That we wouldn't build up such walls

But its clear to me that our world hasn't changed
We haven't learnt at all
But we all pretend things are different now
Because we simply don't want to fall

You Would Think That

— The End —