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Nov 20 · 442
November 20
As the call ended
So did we
Between our phones
Not only the connection broke
But also the hearts,
that were connected as well
Marker
Nov 18 · 167
Queen Of Hearts
For my love was the ruler
Her hands were the walls
that covers my agony.
She was my queen of hearts
And she fell in love
With the joker
An extra in the card
But will always be
In the deck of life
Nov 14 · 181
Noose
When will your ropes break
At 3am on a tight situation
You keep hanging up on the phone
So you can hang out with him
Was the best way
To strangle me
With lies
Oh I have my doubts
Nov 13 · 258
Aisle
Let me take you there
to the place you felt peace
Where you can rest your heart
and to share your vows

With every step we take
My heart finally realized
what my eyes cannot see
That you were once mine
But will forever be his
To every broken dreams
Oct 6 · 50
Untitled
I told my mother
I'll stop drinking if dad comes back home

And it has been a year since I slept without drowning myself
with alcohol
Sep 24 · 164
Ill Will
My eyes hurt whenever I see what they have in their hands
It seems the treasures they have glow more than mine
If I could take what they have maybe I won't whine or demand
For my mother told me a boy should never be envious in life

As I was getting taller my resentment grew stronger and louder,
"I want to have what they want! They have the cleanest of luxury"
I was never raised to grasp rubies so I begrudge men with power
Whenever I want something they refused, so I grew up with envy

Now my hands can afford diamonds like everybody else
the satisfaction that I felt was all I yearned for these years
Looking back to where accessories were considered wealth
Senseless for me to think that not having earthly desires is what I fear

Now if ever I pass by an alley and a kid looks at me with jealousy
Three words to change his look, "Here's a candy"
So he could see that happiness shines more than jewelry
To the kids who were not given anything when they were young
you know what it feels like
Aug 27 · 155
Drunk Calls
When will I stop calling you whenever I'm drunk?
It feels like the alcohol over flows my mind
As if I'm pretending not to miss you
whenever there's no alcohol in the table
but forgotten memories begin to appear
in a bottoms up
I yearned for you once more
Drink moderately
Aug 5 · 119
Broken Youth
I'm going to be a father
Yet my heart does not comprehend
      My youth faded earlier
my shoulders grew heavier each day

As I handle the weight, she handled-more...
I was too young
So I lust over different women
They gave me a taste of what was lost..
But I forgot what will I even gain for
                  temporary pleasure

As I looked her in the eye I saw the
       broken songs we once sung
Her voice cracked like it was too much
                  for her to speak
The hatred she held for me for being a
                             misfit

But God I was too crazy for my youth
       I forgot she was preparing for -  
                       our future
I'm sick of taking flights to see these other girls swear to God I'm gonna change
Jul 27 · 178
Ease
Tell me you love me
and let this heart rest from the past
   as long as your tongue spills the truth
            I can take love a one last shot


          See through the smiles
              Let yourself be swallowed by my voice
                  if you found the flaw within these eyes
                       then I'll echo your name in my room
                                 so if you leave
                                     my heart will go with you
Jul 22 · 154
To The Ends of Love
I woke up with an empty heart and mouthful of words
  waiting for you to come back
      and tell me once more  
           that your heart still latching on my name

Without a glimpse of reality
    I indulged with the fantasy of you and I
        hoping my dreams will match yours
        
At the last road to our chapter
   I found you once again
       you smiled at me like it was the first
             but love ended and said our one last goodbye
Cant keep going
Overthinking
Makes me feel sick
Especially the thoughts of you

Be safe
Always smile
Choose the right one this time
Keep him
Jun 16 · 985
Scars
Take me back
not to undo my scars
but to learn more about myself
How to carry my own burden
to drown my sickness
before it drowns me

I wish I could go back
and redirect my life
back to when living was basic
and math was the only problem
with a solution
****** up
Jun 15 · 274
Inside Battle
Inside my mind
you'll hear me scream
                                                 Will you be the one to break the silence
Or the next name that I shall yell?
****
Jun 12 · 364
No More
I can't love you , my hands are not ready to hold a stranger
     Millions of possibilities yet only one can save us both
         As beautiful as a rose there's no reason to remove your roots
   As quiet as night yet your voice echoes my head

Id rather have purple knuckles than a Purple Heart
No more games of love you can't even win
Thought
Jun 10 · 207
A Message To My Father
F-or the father who left us empty
U-gly is a man that breaks his vows
C-ared less for the best yet cared more for the mistress
K-issed my mother on the cheek you let her hang on the cross          ............just for you to satisfy your lust

Y-our lies echoed on the family table , denying every sin
O-pened roads that will lead to burnt bridges
U-nderstanding the lie to never noticed the truth

My father, this is my message to you
Traitor
Jun 10 · 201
Vodka Glass
A ***** glass is short
yet can contain the strongest liquor

Just like my words
I seldom speak
yet my words will always weigh you down.
Another round at the liquor store
After you left
Cigarettes were the best treatment for hang over kisses
Liquor to drown the butterflies in my stomach
               I'd rather stay with my bad habits
      Than being good to the person
                Who never loved you
Let it go
Jun 9 · 270
For I Am Yours
For I am yours , your lips are the first thing I want to taste every               morning more than my coffee
    Eyes than seen through everything I am and could ever be
Take my hand and let each finger point out the roads we can travel
        Use my feet as wheels that could take you anywhere
    For every place seems so colorful
             Whenever your around
Paris was great !
Jun 7 · 231
Beer
Beer doesn't go well with love
   Like a recorder it takes you back
From words you don't want to hear
  To memories that made you love and fear

For a beer fills the stomach
    Yet it makes my heart spill the truth
Rather waking up drunk
     While slowly letting go of you
Cheers
Mar 23 · 217
Come Again
Nice to see your eyes once more,
full of life and mystery .
The day our fate grew farther
was my tomorrow's misery

5 steps closer, time begins to slow down a little
Long kisses and warm hugs makes my heart more brittle.
Till the last moment your arms were the most warm
A love so beautiful yet full of scars
Mar 21 · 237
Head Banger
I banged my head on the wall for the first time ,
it felt like the last time we talked
the hurt surrounding my head
was like the pain you done to my heart

  Was I thinking right when I hurt myself just to not let you leave
     Or was I wrong  
knowing you'll just turn your back and leave me banging my head more ?
suicide feels wrong but the pain makes my day bright
Dec 2018 · 293
Untitled
The more I feel
The more you see
Difference has been set
but love comes to you and me
The less we talk
The more we hate
shared memories begin to fade
The less I talk
The more I think
love was never ours
efforts go down in the sink.
begone thot
Nov 2018 · 169
What My Last Words Will Be
As time ticks to my last
I regretted everything

The audacity to feel safe
while casualty inflicts harm on yourself and others as well

3am thoughts about how beautiful life is
turn to 3am liquor pounding ,cigarette chasing smoke that blinds my eyes over things that are worth it

7 days God created everything
but it takes a second to pull a trigger
why
Nov 2018 · 284
Fantasy
Music drowns the room as our bodies
     sway like the tide.
The audacity to stay in someone's life
   just to become a fantasy,
    Hoping prayers can be granted just by  a press of a button

         As the rain tasted like yesterday's memories.
I've been dying for reality the whole time when the moment you left
Nov 2018 · 182
Broken
I loved a thousand times
failed far more
here I am

open arms
with heart stitches
and broken lungs that force too much
on people who give too little

love my scars
as I will love yours
no matter how deep or how wide
Our time is to move forward
not staying only to heal

As my hand holds yours
painkillers are a remnants of the past
and never will be used in the future
love me for who I am
Oct 2018 · 407
Opposites
There's nothing more beautiful
than a woman showing love to everyone
          But I curse thy self for believing
       I was special

As a man like me hated the world while my fist are the keys to my door and everything that is locked

I loved you
    Darling I loveD you ...
3 am thoughts
Oct 2018 · 228
Not Like You
Don't compare me to the streets in your way...  
       I don't let others walk on a path
    that's only for one ..

    I'm not like you  |  I am not a deadman's house
              Where people only come to your door just to be entertained.
                         .I'm better.
               Better than you,but still
        you bring out what's best

in me...
Work my way out of this situation
Oct 2018 · 268
Cause The Stars Told Me So
They told me there's a light brighter
than the stars

I didn't know it was you and your good heart
Oh starlig nights
they keep me looking at your gorgeous eyes
Oct 2018 · 670
Taking Back The Clock
Id go back to the first moment
   Where your eyes shined brighter
When your lips curls up everytime
        you called my name

When your hands never grew tired
      holding mine
        As Cigarettes were my yesterday's comfort habit ,
     I got addicted to you more.

     I used to think love tasted sweeter
      the longer you stay
  
This time I need that time machine
        to get another taste .
Oh I cry everytime I fail
trying to bring back what was once ours
Im not smart enough to create the impossible time machine to go back in time
but I'll be wiser to change this today
and pray for what fate molds us to be
Oct 2018 · 169
Love Poem
When the heart stops beating your name,
It aches constantly trying to get rid of the flat line that you caused.

What was once your voice that alarms her thoughts of empty dreams,

The orchestra that fills her lungs everytime you exhale next to her

Turned to tequila shots that she take every time you lie about missing her

She writes love poems daily to remind you love can be written down in paper,
She felt the whole world in your arms just because she insisted for you to stay.

Yet you left her
and the only thing you said
is "goodbye"
When she left I heard music
A music that is new to my ears
A music that does not resemble any artist that she likes
A music that the world provides me everyday that I did not knew was there
I was too attracted to her and made her my world That I forgot the real world was more colorful without her
Oct 2018 · 201
I GAVE HER EVERYTHING
From the pearls in the sea
to the moon that lights the dark
I GAVE HER EVERYTHING  

"*******!" I cursed the world
my throat have never been this sore
my feet felt sober
from all the drunk steps I took
JUST TO GET CLOSER TO YOU

MY VISION MIGHT BE BLURRY
BUT I LOVED YOU STRAIGHT
In my eyes I saw heaven
in your arms i felt home
I longed for a short moment with you

GUESS THIS IS CALLED A LOVESICK BLUES
heh
Sep 2018 · 226
Modern Warfare
These days words **** people more
the sharpest tongue dominates
No matter the situation
It eats the victim more and more
Not killing in a single bullet
Yet let them sink in
of what weakness they possess
Turning words into deadly machines
It prisons the weak in a daily basis
IF YOU HAVE DEPRESSION TALK TO ME
STRANGER TO YOUR MIND
I AM HERE
Sep 2018 · 173
Habits
We often latch on habits that kills us
Cigarettes turn to painkillers
Liquor turns to cough syrups

I die everyday without a dose of heaven

As we picture out these habits
as an escape from reality
Sep 2018 · 277
Dreams
I dream a silly dream
   my poems were  dancing
in a moonlight sky my words float
and rained on your head
  
I dream a lovely dream
     my hands held yours in a drunken night
    as we walked on a road we used to call home
         Gazing on those eyes the moment skyrocketed so high no pill can do

I dreamt of you in many ways
   kissing booths on a carnival
to drinking sessions on a side way
   I've never felt so euphoric
as the day these lips kissed yours

As I woke up from those dreams
I couldn't wait for bedtime
              reality kills me when you're not the one
habits#4
Sep 2018 · 265
Dancing Naked
Here I am ,exposing every molecule
these are for your eyes only
My feet fell in love with the floor when the moment I took steps
to get closer to you

As we danced , my hands on your hips
my heart on your hand I've started gazing on your soul
eye to eye while the moonlight shines like a Broadway show
In that moment I knew
I loved you naked
as you were dancing with clothes on
all night
Habits#3
Sep 2018 · 488
Painkillers
I don't want to be just a happy pill

or something that gives you euphoria

love is more than smiles and ***

the older you get the painful it is to know

So let me be the painkiller to every battle scar you have

The nicotine to your cigarette as it embraces your lungs more than I can

In a way where love can always be found
we need pain in order to know we are alive
Habit#2
Sep 2018 · 168
Last Part Of Me
I scattered every last bit of myself
to places where I have been
I've lost my own soul
yet in those places
I am rich

One place is the bar
Where my lips linger on people i don't know
Beer tasted like Sunday's gospel
in a crowded room full of hypocrites

Second place is my bed
a bottomless pit full of my emotions
my bed sheet have seen the worst
my feet trapped on the feeling of comfort
while the world is cruel enough
to not even recognize your pain

The last is in your hands
Arms like heaven's embrace
I've been dying to live for your touch
as days turn to nights
you light my world more than the kitchen light we dance to all day

In places I have been
I lost myself more
in your eyes
Habit #1
Sep 2018 · 179
Magic Trick
I'll snap my fingers
to make you fall in love with me
1...2....3...
Did it work? no?
Probably you don't believe in me

You didn't snap your fingers
but I've fallen for you
no countings
it worked
because I believe
showstopper
Sep 2018 · 131
ShowStopper
We desire a love

that makes us stop on our feet

the eyes follow on dreams we can't
reach

the hands cramp of holding what we can't grip

the heart begins to slow down as she walks by

thats the time you'll realize all things come and go

and the show must go on
Copper
Sep 2018 · 230
Where Lovers Hide
I want your nails up in my back
as the mood intensifies
you'll scream more
in every muscle moving
as my lips pressed on your neck
in a bed we called paradise
The only heaven we won't share
and a perfect place where lovers
can hide
bed **** mornings with crispy moans dipped in love
Sep 2018 · 292
Timeless
Taking back the time
no time machine needed
all that we need to have
is us
in a place where memories stayed
and love
faded

So take me back
use the time machine if needed
bring yourself is all that I need
to a place that our memory fades
and love we've been dying
to heal
bronze
Sep 2018 · 181
Opposite
If you'd ask why I didn't choose you
My tongue curls up to say
That you were the dream
and she was the reality

I've slept far too longer
denying every truth
that the heart needs to wake up
knowing it will never be you

You were the happy thought
at the back of my brain
kept lock inside
being scared that things might change

But I found the weapon
to end all of our suffering
no deadly blades or guns
but only a tongue
having the courage to say
"i'm letting go"
silver
Both can ****
        The only difference is
                      Cigarettes shatter lungs
         She shatters everything

            I remembered the first moment
my lips pressed the filter
     as I lit it up breathed it all
                savored every smoke
       as if we covered up painful lies
        in a container of painkillers

The same way  
we used to pressed our lips
     sparked something between us
           savored every moment we had
    as if our love was a rose
               in a valley of tulips
Gold
The intro played and so did the memories
Fantasy was our  favourite place to hang out when reality separated us

For a slight moment we had
Like a 4 minute music
it was too perfect to end
too beautiful to stop

The music stops
I press repeat
not just only  to remember you
but repeating a music
a music that was both loved
by me and you
Fantasy -Khai Dreams
Sep 2018 · 350
Happy
If she's happy
I'll smile to that
for all the misery I weighed on her shoulder
it's time for her to let loose .

Love may or might be
a closest thing to reach heaven
yet here I am
wondering the widest road
to get her close once more .

I know she won't make you wipe her tears away
She's a woman that you dont need to worry
She'll make you think twice
before you even say sorry .

She's a keeper
yet I left her lonely
a broken heart for not choosing her
got me feeling blue
an ache I long subdue
oh my
Silence is a broken  man's curse
  He would rather hear voices
than be surrounded with a blank noise
   feasting on every memory
   he succumbs to a deep slumber
        being drowned by his thoughts
                   shackled by pain
                        not hearing anything
         but only a soft ring on his ears
             and a shattering heart
                            to endure
"In love I have risen and in love I shall fall"
Aug 2018 · 1.7k
If She Comes Back
If she comes back
      I'll let her do her way  
          a crowd of beauty and potential
         she chose me to be her headache
im not much.. more likely too less
   for every drunk cries I make
Her sitting next to me without making        a single flinch killed me for not being her next
    She wanted love ,I gave her pain
          why does empty spaces hurt more than a room full of different faces
      In the end I only once knew
      to love a real woman hurts so bad to be true
Aug 2018 · 166
Lost
People couldn't find the way
        probably they forgot
could it be they were too hurt to remember
                   or to happy to notice
    If my mind was a road
I'd give you a way
        a perfect example of a person
    who thrives for other's needs while  
                            loosing his own way
    If you broke down
                clouded with sin
        only you can heal yourself
           it starts from within
Aug 2018 · 179
A Single Smile
A single smile , like the battery to any machine it brings the life out.
Everytime the world feeds hate , one joyful approach ain't a mistake
If you see a person walking by
,chin up and look at them in the eye
tell them a good day.
people are peculiar being different is a happy thing
share a laugh and smile
before everything  ends in a click
Aug 2018 · 268
Mother Why
Mother why does your tone speak like shattered glass?
everytime I make a mistake you seem to make things last
Mother you have the most talent
to turn your voice into a broken recorder you often say things again and again
Mother I don't mean to insult you
but mother you are so focused on what your eyes see me
Mother Im trying my best
Isn't it so hard to see?
Your child is moving mountains yet you only see me moving rocks
I'm making a change while you're just making myself more into pressure
Mother can't you see
or am I the only one that can face
me?
Aug 2018 · 256
Writing Drunk
The last time I saw you
the word "perfection" will never be enough to describe you
your light brown hair
the way you look
as if the moon shines its way back to you
words can never fit in my hand
as metaphors can never be enough to kiss you
and poetry cannot completely describe how I miss you
but I'll write this while im drunk
to let you know
drunl thoughts always leads me to you
always you
****
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