it is
so much easier
to talk
to him

since
i don't care
anymore
if he feels
something
for me

seeing you
in the
early morning
always
makes me grateful
that i
stood up

i try
to remember
this dream
that felt so real

but with
every day
it fades

i always
look forward
to tuesday

cause on tuesdays
i am able to
see you
for an whole hour
instead
of just
catching glances
at you

i always
go to bed
hoping
that i dream

cause in my dreams
it is you
i meet

cause in my dreams
i can live
what i imagine

cause in my dreams
you feel
the same way
i do

so when i
wake up
i am disappointed
that my dream
had to end

you put me
under your spell
with

the way
your eyes smile
whilst
your mouth
is hanging
a bit open
in concentration

the way
your laugh
brightens up
your eyes

the way
you look
over the drums
towards me

the way
you are you

i was sitting there
drunken and
deep minded

with her
in the cold wind
talking
about everything
and nothing

and even though
i enjoyed
talking with her
i still wish
it was you

i want to know
all the thoughts
that rob your sleep
when you go to bed

i want to know
what you wish
you'd done better
in the past

i want to know
what you see
when you think
about your future

i want to know
all the fears
that lame you

i want to know
what makes you human

i was
mesmerized
by your movements

the way
your hands
danced over
the drums

the way
your face
lightened up
when you played
the rhythm right

the way
you groaned
when you didn't

the way
you laughed
at the same time
with us

i should have
listened
to what
the professor
was saying

i should have
watched
what he
was showing us

but instead

i listened to you
to the little rhythm
you played
on the drums

and i watched
the way
your hands
danced
over them

tell me

who crosses
your mind
when you are
laying awake
listening to
your favorite songs?

whose smile
flashes before
your eyes?

and
whose eyes
meet you
in your dreams?

already
a bit drunken
i found you

and with
your green eyes
your honest smile
combined with
the small distance
between us
and your smell

you intoxicated me
even more

were you
just bored
or
did you
really want to
talk with me?

i am
listening to
my favorite songs

and you
sneak again
into my thoughts

and maybe

you are
listening to
your favorite songs
too

but i am sure
that i never
sneak into
your thoughts

Poems written
late at night
are always
the most honest

Because
late at night
the overthinkers
are way to sleepy
to filter their words

Only then they truly
don’t longer speak
with their mind
but
with their heart

the older
the night became

the more
my thoughts swirl

the more often
they found their way
back to you

your green eyes
met
my brown eyes

and whilst you
never broke
the eye contact
i did

but i
was always
the first
to look again

your green eyes
were fixed
on the screen

and you
were listening
to your favorite songs


my brown eyes
tried to
catch yours

and i were
listening absently
to my friends
and the song
that reminds me
of you

my mind
keeps running
running away
from the idea
of an us

but my heart
keeps coming back
whispering
what if...?

my mind
is foggy
and drunken

but

somehow
it still
found its way
through
to you

And even after all, I don’t really know him.
Even after all, I’m not sure, what I feel for him.
If he is my imagination of an amazing boyfriend.
If it’s a crush.
If it’s love.

But I know that there is something about him, something I’m not really sure about.
Something that messes with my feelings.
Something, that I want to get to know.

Maybe this something is the fact, that he has a girlfriend.
Maybe this something is the fact that he treats her well, which confirms my picture, my imagination of him.

But maybe this something is my hope, when he told me, something in their relationship seems to fade, seems to be lost.

Maybe I just like complicated things.
Maybe I just like daydreaming about someone, who doesn’t love me.

Who probably never will.

Maybe this something is the fact, that he won’t disappear out of my head.
When I lay in bed, with my headphones on, I often find myself thinking about him.

Fantasize about dates we will never have.
About a kiss we will never have.
About a future we will never have.

Maybe this something is that these daydreams are stuck in my head, even though he doesn’t even do something…

Maybe this something is the way he is a bit childish.
But in a sweet way.
Maybe it’s the way he’s walking springy when he’s in a good mood and not surrounded of people.
But maybe he’s only like that when he’s with me.

Maybe this something is the fact that he’s not ashamed in front of me.
That he sings along with songs, no matter if it sounds good or not. But maybe he just does this when he’s with me.

Maybe this something is the way he’s trying to make me laugh.
Like when he makes a joke and waits for my reaction.
Or when he moves along with music with the awareness, that it looks funny.
And I think that’s really sweet.  

I mean… he’s such a ******. But it’s sweet.

Maybe this something is his body language.
Maybe it’s the way you can tell how he feels in the way he moves.
If he’s comfortable or if he isn’t. But maybe only I can tell it.

Maybe this something is his humour.
He doesn’t take everything too serious, which is great, because he always relaxes the mood.
Maybe it’s the fact, that he sometimes tries to relax the mood in inappropriate situations.

i am not
going to
lie

i tried
to find
your socials

but it's like
you don't
even exist

the stranger
whom i only
knew by name

got more
and more
interesting

with every
passing by
with every
eye contact

Warm sunbeams
touching
cold snow

Making it
twinkle
like stars


Before
the snow
finally
returns
to its
original form

here i am
writing
about love
although
i am just a child.

and what
can a child
possibly know
about love?

what should be
will come
and if
it doesn't come
then it just shouln't be

but in my heart
i still hope
that
someday
there will be
shared feelings
between us

how is it
that you
just don't see
what i feel
for you?

i am
happy for you
don't get me wrong

but honestly

i am
a bit jealous

because i want
somebody
to feel about me
the way
he does about you

when i am
lost in thoughts
and
look up
to the moon

it almost feels
as if they say

"everything
is going to be
alright."

i guess
i am just
a sucker
for hopeless
romances

who is
the lucky one
who won
your heart?

even the moon
has its
specific time
to shine


yours will come too

i tried to
memorize everything
about you
not knowing when
i would see you
again

but

the only thing
i remember
is the look
in your green eyes

i always hope
it is
your name
that pops up
on my screen

Maybe this something is his eyes. His hazel eyes.
Maybe it’s the way they look at you.
Maybe it’s the way he winks at me.
It’s attractive but also really cute.

Maybe it’s the fact, that his eyes are telling how he really feels. Maybe it’s the way, that his eyes are the keys to his soul.
You feel like you could touch it.
Maybe it’s the way you could stare into his eyes forever.

But maybe only I could stare into these eyes forever.

i was staring
trough the screen
into your eyes

as i whispered
into the dark

"what's the deal
with you?"

and i waited
for an answer

in vain