I never expected to capture anything more
than a fragment of you
A phrase you might once have spoke in your sleep,
A twitch of your lips,
Or the curve of your spine when you stretched.

I soon realized that snippets of you were all about the place,
caught in the hedge by the back gate or reflected in the kettle.
The rings of coffee mugs on my old desk,
and loose change down the back of the sofa.
Even when I was away I still found you,
Sand in my shoes, folded corners in my books,

Even though you are gone,
I can see you in myself.
I speak with your words,  
I still see the world as you described it,
Full of wonder and curiosity,
But now tinged with bitterness.
Lyrics from your songs lurk in my mind,
And an aching emptiness where my heart once was.

I cannot forget you,
For I cannot escape you.

Who made you the centre of my universe?
Because it sure wasn't me.
Do you think that I want my life to revolve around you?
like i'm just a planet orbiting the sun,
A pair of jeans in the washing machine
Or flotsam in a whirlpool.
I don't suppose you'd understand,
How dizzy I get,
after a day around you
Or even a few moments.
How I can't keep my balance
And the world sort of tips
till' everything is inside out
backwards and all mixed up.
Except you.
because for some reason
the only stable thing
in this topsy-turvy world
is you.

abyss tried left pulling untitled beauty scales heavy chase lies shoulders flew starvation body rough broke veins water crawling beat angel sun slow fly looked morning hear walls wake live touch need blame wasn't looking gave stand whirled planet want way know pair inside hold thousands going gravity friends different universe sparks end help trance million lungs pumped oh hand struggle spine mirror bleeding surely crave suddenly draw rasp clouds face smile rushes pooling feet calls shatter glance circuited risk catch danced seeing eye pieces jumps irresistible false barefoot blow stretching helium hair-trigger deserve near wall trail wish told tip razor requiring staining pure holding un-calculated precarious short health think scare drowned tight light proportioning maybe arm filled hair fight spins centre loose vulnerable lightest balanced noticed step rope stains rot wanting deserved realized bitter connection set instead selfish cast shame blamed aside shut overwhelmed factories ***** stretch roads lattice toxic nations sores polluting cities smog mechanical landscape great guilt affection mistakes forgive ate actions intimacy tsunami given fine tired self-pity free decay came lied signs smiling doubt small fault passion words fell admit default finally true matter wounded cope pride strength burning submit okay best paint hate reading realize listening music eating lonely walking child dreamt heat bystanders wound deaf glassy sunken opened sat hidden knew sneers smoke reflection arched web lovers mother drinking beasts ***** lines rivers blameless spewing sectioning leaving asphalt blistered whilst scattered plagued villages birds peace tea countryside scars machines torn 'civilization' tarmac land etched earth towns war sprawling rip snowed forced symmetry choose changed big flakes flurrie touched shall soul follow hunt new yesterday lasted brothers seconds adapt fluid hard wet state whirling fluffy liquid ground jewles crown adorn suffocating stones ran cloying caught burst silent beneath crept shredding numbness crawled got moss moon wear does soars wingless anguish dark course retreated rushed covered festered decaying princesses lie faeries dance hide mountains 1157 feelings sameness year change forward quite happy roar everyone's lives tall wide river dreams swim cries spirits phoenixes dragons soar conversations minuets savor overwhelming single remember unable devastating mermaids beings humans weak force unmeasurable bold consume makes afar repeating shining existence space comprehend the entities human humanity vivid insignificance infinitesimal embodied edges pressure grow thought jealous inner size weight felt voice downfall thing vast seduced strong galaxy whispered plot artistry belong struggled visible prison make systematic shrunk suns carry captivity constellations lazy rigorous impulsive tons understanding term wants loner unrealistic introverted perpetual personal care-free contradiction long extrovert unhealthy rational bullshitter therapist competitive energetic detached planner burn honest optimist mediator fit hot grating mold grime weighing fingers humid disintegrated rushing faltered sockets scramble chest frantically impenetrable reason disease silence sound gasped closed fled drowning nose faded choked insects stench rationality peals drown couldn't wondrous inspired unsaid settled smaller held expanse hostage began bars lucid sleep open mess sea rest consumes not to afloat darkness little elusive try movements attracted like mind heart stars life eyes world broken just feel time blood screamed pain bring throat nature wrong breath images thoughts apart wanted glass filling anymore hope humanity skin ripping look mouth head fantasy panic hands away human brain ears air saw balance kept pass cold white fall delicate structure

Feel pity for the turtle,
Born captive in a bowl.
Swimming in a circle,
A life been bought and sold.

He has his natural instincts,
Engrained in DNA.
I wonder what he thinks,
Being captive every day.

To him, it must feel wrong.
A missing link to life.
Pondering all along,
Why his surroundings don't suffice.

If released to the wild,
Survival would be scarce.
He's been captive since a child.
Born an artificial heir.

The turtle knows only this society,
It's what he's been born into.
His intuition - alive, indeed,
Tells him what turtles do.

I watch him in his tank, a curse.
How it must feel strange.
Born to fulfill a turtle's life purpose,
But forced into walls, by humans who exchange.

I feel pity for the turtle,
Then realize my foolishness.
Humans, too, know the artificial -
Yearning for natural happiness.

We build up our own glass walls,
And bear children to not see,
That there is life beyond this all,
That offers more than we think we need.

We, too, are like turtles,
Having a purpose to fulfill.
We overcome so many hurdles,
Within glass walls that ****.

I love you,
Wildly, silently,
Imitating it's idly,
Displaying my affection quietly.

Timid, I am, of course.
Enjoying our discourse.
And everything you are,
I'm so heavenly immersed -

Yes, in your quirky quarks from quasars,
Running its benevolent course.

Still, inside, I thirst.
To let you know,
I'm yours.

Lost in a loving serge. . .

With quarks from the hottest starburst.

Everything I put out is
An extension of me.
Like the fruit at the tips of the tree --
The fruit is my gift to thee.

Perfect time,
Perfect place.

Perfect rhyme,
Perfect pace.

Perfect chime,
Perfect phrase -

To describe perfect days.