"overcompensate" poems
NEW AGAIN
AGAIN I AM LONGING.
FOR AGAINS ARE REPETITIVE.
IT SEEMS I NEED TO HURT.
I NEED TO OVERCOMPENSATE.
BUT I AM BROKEN FROM BEFORES.
SHOULD I AGAIN, AGAIN?
QUICKSILVER THOUGHTS,
RUNNING MADLY,
DEADLY IF CONSUMED.
AND I AM CONSUMED AGAIN.
THE INNOCENCE OF EYES,
MY OWN FAILURES REFLECTED BACK.
I AM MOTHER, DAUGHTER.
EX-LOVER, EX-FIANCE… EX HUMAN?
I AM TEARING AT MY SOULSKIN,
A WEREWULF AT FULL MOON.
MY INNER BEING IS SUFFOCATING.
IT’S TOO EASY TO BE HAPPY.
HARD IS GOOD.
I MUST BE GOOD.
A GOOD LITTLE PUPPY.
A BAD LITTLE PUPPY.
WILL I BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS ME?
Feb 17, 2010
Feb 17, 2010 at 3:42 AM UTC
*How does one overcompensate
For the incompetence of a nation?*
No compromise for the masses
undeniably stuck in ruts of habit
These days Ive seen and see
We're all craving harmony
With no equitable solution
To take the race out of the face
It's just accumulative corruption
Apprehensive assimilation
Aggression stirring underneath
A stone passive shade of sentience
Now say we might anticipate
The fantasizing fringe of youth
Where we will conquer or be conquered
By depravic spurring truth
Oct 27, 2011
Oct 27, 2011 at 2:07 AM UTC
Sit back and over-analyse
the lies that you were serving my mind.
Providing a way to relate
and trying not to overcompensate
for my lack of you,
I should have known you’d
***** and moan enough that
in time,
I could make your whines rhyme.
(Maybe that’s why your speaker points
were always the lowest.)
In this debate,
rate my way and rate of diction,
because truth is stranger than fiction
I sigh
cause I’m lying through my teeth
when I say “I’m okay”.
Sit back and wait for
what you think you have to say
We wager away our
bad experiences,
nearing another night of searing
dreaming
playing make-believe
with a ballpoint pen.
Remember the way all this started
with an oration and the weight
of what came to be a bad break up
make up
break up
wake up
to a world where you two don’t fit together.
Force your cracks into each others’
like broken heirlooms
Shake off the dust,
Can’t shake the thought that you’d be happier
without me.
I can’t see through this cloud of doubt without
an explanation,
an answer to the chance
that I can’t distinguish
the morning dew from her rose petals
that she tried to drown you in
from your tears.
“If this ain’t love
then how do we get out?”
Get out of this mess,
regress back into an obsession
with death,
and destruction,
let me provide some instruction
on obstructing these thoughts
that threaten to consume
what I assume is your last shred
of sanity.
Oct 19, 2014
Oct 19, 2014 at 11:12 PM UTC
Sometimes I wish I was better at goodbyes. Maybe instead of saying, "See you tomorrow." I could've said, "See you as the seconds become too much of a forever for me to understand time."
Maybe if I was better at goodbyes, I wouldn't have to be so shocked to see you walk pace after pace to put distance in between my body and my heart.
Maybe if I was better at goodbyes, I wouldn't be filling up pages with hope and a loose grip trying to keep you in a place you don't want to be.
Maybe the entire matter of saying goodbye wouldn't be an issue if I followed every hello with a, "May you live long and well without me."
I've been wandering the unlit streets for so long that when a light begins to shine in the eternal night, I latch on to it like a leech latches on to scarlet filled bodies until I've burned out the light.
And I'm so terribly sorry for all the woes I've added to yours and I am forever in your debt; a debt I cannot repay with words or a life.
I'm sorry for the way my shadow casts out your light and the way my hands hold on for longer than you want them to but I've been alone for a long time and I overcompensate my loneliness with what you don't wish to give.
I live my life trying to repay my debts but I am neither oath bound nor promised to you. Nonetheless every drop of life I can give, I will give.
Every ounce of pain I can take, I will take.
And I will not love; for love is a luxury meant to those who deserve it and I don't.
The only goodbye I can muster is the whispers in the wind of the way I could've loved you and every wave of grief the ocean sends as an apology to the shore for leaving so abruptly.
A goodbye was expected and a goodbye will be given
A goodbye you will have to accept and a goodbye I have no choice but to give
For the leaves have long weathered its branches and a parasite is only living through the things it kills and I have killed.
I have killed my strength
I have killed my belief
I have killed my happiness
I have killed you
My limbs are not strong and my arms cannot hold you
My eyes are brimming with pain and I cannot translate unheard promises to you
My ears are covered and I cannot hear your pleas
All I know is the pain of goodbyes and it is all I can ever be
Maybe if I were better at letting myself fall into fierce torrents of water
Maybe if I were better at being a friend, a sister, a student, a daughter, a follower
Maybe if I deserved a sense of happiness and love
Maybe
Maybe then I could be saved
But I am not
And I'm afraid its too late to be saved
May 15, 2014
May 15, 2014 at 1:22 AM UTC
Exterminate
repopulate
overcompensate and
so exterminate
Mar 10, 2014
Mar 10, 2014 at 1:53 AM UTC
Think positive
*Have you learned nothing about
me?*
Have you learned nothing of me?
-.-
Fire with fire... Questions with questions
*Smoke with ashes, I'll smother
you -.-*
After nine lashes, you've nothing better to do?
*Before your funeral, you've got
nothing better to say?*
Inhibitions compensated, though so futile. Bury yourself beneath your yesterdays.
*Trial and error, yet so naive.
Through your mistakes and
heartaches, you still
overcompensate.*
Smiling through tears, and tearing through smiles? What do you fear--everything prior, or just one more trial?
*Been crying through the pain
for far too long. I fear...
Simply everything, to avoid
the hurt, why is that so wrong?*
Not wrong, but you hold doubt where hope belongs. Don't wallow in the dirt, or hold on to this morning's dawn.
*But where I should see hope,
there's only despair. I'm not
wallowing, simply realistic. It's
really not fair, to assume I'm
being over dramatic.*
Learn to cope when people are unfair. Try hallowing what you know's simplistic. There's much in the air, besides the cruelness of fanatics.
*But the evil is overwhelming,
it truly surrounds me, in my
mind and my heart.
Sometimes, I can't help but
fall apart...*
When the Devil is swelling, his doings unruly, and it all mounts on you, know there is kindness. Just part with the bad times and take the goodness to heart.
Nov 13, 2014
Nov 13, 2014 at 8:37 PM UTC
My biggest lie,
Is my image at work.
An industrious being.
A diligent soul.
I shower my hours,
Like sprinkles on candy.
To an office that shuts,
Its doors on my feet.
The brainwashed child,
Of the lazy generation,
We're expected to overcompensate,
For their misbehaven.
The life we live,
For a plaque and a desk,
The **** we take,
For a life of unrest.
They sell us dreams,
We can't afford,
Then make us slaves,
To free our souls.
The man is evil,
An awful beast.
He tells you how to live,
So buy us to break free.
The world is polluted,
There is no respite.
Every passion bought,
Every dream's got a price.
So punch those keys,
And get back to work.
Let's be frank,
It's the devil's world.
Jan 19, 2017
Jan 19, 2017 at 9:49 AM UTC
Walking on walls,
dancing on the ceiling,
the room is spinning,
I’m going through,
the motions.
Playlist on shuffle,
but I don’t like this song,
or this one,
this one,
and that one too.
My tongue is twisted,
and my throat is choking,
I’m going through the motions,
I don’t wanna,
go through the motions.
I’m getting sick,
it just won’t stick,
I forgot the words,
someone hit reverse,
I don’t wanna,
go through the motions.
My mind is slipping,
my feet,
tripping,
I forgot how to,
go through the motions.
I overcompensate,
say things I shouldn’t say,
I shoot,
he scores,
I’m tired of going,
through the motions.
I jump head first,
hold my breath,
this is my chance,
I’m not going,
through the motions.
Jun 15, 2022
Jun 15, 2022 at 9:57 AM UTC
You left me here to decay
I took it the usual way...
broke down with angst and dismay
nevertheless
I've learned the errors of my ways
you taught me great
to never settle for less
or rather
overcompensate
so I'm picking up my life
from the worse of my days
I had forgotten reality
persuaded by your haze
my excuse was that I enjoyed being used
a denial of my faith
you confused my morals
manipulated my nature
made it hard for me to relate
blasted unarguable fate
so while I'm stuck in the present
I am obliged to say
that I have nothing to be sorry over
you were always my priority A
and now I'm reorganizing.
May 21, 2011
May 21, 2011 at 6:32 AM UTC
i.
To catch a boy in the wake of summer
Leave out a cup
Brimming with melon-colored milk tea and tapioca
Make sure to capture his smile
When he spills some on the counter
When it is still warm on the cheeks
And independence has yet to be fully realized
You catch a boy by offering him the futon
Night after night after night after night
You don’t think to ask your mom and
He doesn’t seem to mind the basement stench
But you overcompensate with your words anyway
You’re good at that
Kesha plays like a hymn in the cathedral
Of his boyfriend’s second car
But you catch a boy with the menthol sound
Of Cavetown at dusk in your hole of a bedroom
And he sits on the bed and watches you paint
As his notifications are piling up with passive-aggressive texts
Summer tastes like lemon and cough drops
Sep 10, 2019
Sep 10, 2019 at 1:57 AM UTC
Dear *******
I don't need more ****
Blowing up the media
Blowing up my sanity
Blowing up the world
Literally
Dear ******
Ruining humanity
Because you feel the need
To overcompensate for
Your feelings of insecurity
I don't appreciate
How you choose to draw attention
To yourself
In such a negative way
Dear *******
Get your **** together
You need to learn that
You are not the only one who matters
You are not the only person
In this world with a
"Correct" opinion
Get off your high horse
And if you're gonna shoot up some
Place just because you
Feel so under-appreciated
Don't ******* shoot yourself
Dear *****
Get your ********* *******
Out of their twists
You've got no more right than
Others who feel so down on their luck
To go around
******* **** up
Stop being a *****
Dear ****
I don't care if you ***** up your life
But I do give a ****
When you meddle with mine
I do give a **** when you **** with
OUR world
And yes, I get that this letter
To all you *********
Who think you're so ****** special
Could get me hurt
Shot
And killed
But at least I know how to use words
To speak out against injustice
And to speak up for my beliefs
Rather than just pulling a trigger
Or dropping a bomb
Sincerely,
A Very ****** Off *****
Jun 14, 2016
Jun 14, 2016 at 4:21 PM UTC
Behind the mirrors in my head the ground was made of sand
But I could not get far enough to see beyond the land
So like a plant, the stem my feet, I grew what I could stand
And waited for the day to come when height would take command
For then my eyes could not create a farce from lack of sight
And thus sustain reality to vilify the spite
Reflection I have come to know as that which carries light
But more than this, a filter for the things you choose to fight
But when you overcompensate for work you have not done
The angle made will redirect the shining of the sun
Distorted now, your vision claims to be the only one
Who kept up with the pace you set when you began to run
Apr 27, 2013
Apr 27, 2013 at 11:39 AM UTC
I could never put a name to this feeling. This feeling of a rush has been so normal. But normal things one day can too, become unhealthy.
The imbalance in which you flow, has incorrectly been funneled into your brain. Now that I can name you, I shall name you Sero. Sero, is in us all but why must some be involved with such a heavy flow. This flood would overcompensate our feelings and make us, unreal or bizarre. Derealization has overcome you now, there is no escape - or so you think. Detached, shocked and horrified of this impending doom, has left you utterly mesmerized by the fact that there is so much you are unable to do now. An escape has to be planned accordingly, although you are not involved with writing out your day's work, your brain has all of the "happy locations" logged and places of which you have not experienced yet are never aloud to be unlocked. You feel abnormal, your heart is somehow in your stomach running on a dirt road. You are sweating like condensation from a water bottle on a summers day. Your body's cold, just like that water bottle. You're just as flexible and hold composure on the outside, but as the heavy flow of Sero is now introduced into the brain, the cap fly's off and you don't feel that surrounding holding you back anymore. Gravity has shifted and you are floating in fear. But you will never drown, you will always make it out alive.
Jul 7, 2019
Jul 7, 2019 at 1:11 AM UTC
my voice is a window
that opens to my throat leading
behind my rubber band lungs
and into my humming, drumming,
beanbag heart
my voice is excitable
ringing out into my space
struggling to embrace the eardrums of my companions
and be heard for truth
my voice is a shapeshifter
that wants to make you laugh with it
not at it
and will go great lengths to
elicit that sound from the depths of you
my voice will step on your toes
and then apologize profusely
because my voice wants to be known
but also wants to know you back
my voice will hold your hand in the dark
cushion your heavy thoughts like a pillow
and sooth your worries like shea butter
on a cracked left palm
my voice is loud
like and 8 year old on a playground
explaining the rules of tag
to their rowdy best friends
my voice will make music with you
it will hesitate and it will overcompensate
but if you catch it on a note that isn't self aware
my voice will harmonize
my voice is mine
and it lives just outside of me
in the open
where I am no longer just electric thoughts
but where I am sounding
Apr 7, 2015
Apr 7, 2015 at 1:06 AM UTC
I softly run my fingers along the covers,
a barricade from the darkness that sits,
patiently,
lurking in the shadows.
I know that I have to get up, have to get up,
because if I don't then that will be it then...
he would have won...
my fears don't overcompensate for my pride, as I climb out from my hiding spot.
my feet hit the cold tile floor, and it somehow seems to burn,
like how as children, the ground was the lava that you avoided while jumping from couch to chair to couch again.
only this time, I plunged into the lava, knowing it's safer to burn then to freeze in your cold hostility.
I'd rather turn to ash, be a piece of dust in the wind, then stay frozen in time.
my hands ball into tight fists at my sides, anxiety travels around my insides, down my spine, and quickly circles my brain a few times before plummeting into my stomach once more.
I know what's on the other side of the door. the door I've hidden behind for too long. the door that I've slammed into countless faces. the door that I slide down each time I cry. the door that doesn't lock, so I have to put a dresser in front so my demons can't get in. the door... the same door that I'm opening now for the first time in days.
I step out into the dimly lit hallway... and there he stands. ready to kick me down. ready to see me fall. always there to catch my tears, then slap me around for crying in the first place. there he is. only he's something I can't fight back. he's everywhere and he's nowhere to be found. he's in front of me, but also inside me. he watches me while I sleep. he walks by my side down dark city streets. he carries me to the water, and feeds me to the sharks. he feeds me lies that are laced with poison. he has expectations, but won't tell me what they are. he has rules that I'm made to follow, but are invisible to the mortal eye. he's ruining my life, but he's all I am.
he's reality...
and **** can he be a *****
Oct 16, 2015
Oct 16, 2015 at 7:53 PM UTC
Now, now remember who you are and don't sink
to their level, empty vessels make the most noise
You know these are plain ordinary people
Inherent inferiority complex needs a front
They need to vent, to feel significant to feel some power
Don't let them feel bad, don't show them that you know anything
just remain accommodating, gracious and respectful
They already know who you are
that's why they do all they do
you don't need to prove anything
Don't go showing you're are bright, adequate and capable
Don't let them feel outclassed and outflanked or useless
They are real people and they have tender feelings
Fragile egos always feel threatened and some will overcompensate
Understand where their resentment or false bravado stems from
Understand their need for recognition and a taste of power and control, mediocrity will put on a show always
even if its at your expense, just lower your expectations
and feel compassion for they have so much missing in them
They've never really had self esteem, confidence and self assurance
They, by their humble positions feel angry and some envious
So please let them feel they matter and are a worthwhile force too.
Yes, yes I know it's at your expense
But you know who and what you are
THEY DON'T HAVE NOTABILITY or a real solid identity
Please understand and be wise. You know those with real strength
have no need to prove it.
The Best General does not need to go to war
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.
Remember, any fool can know, the POINT is to understand
They are shallow and don't understand, so please remember
Be RESPONSIBLE and above all....
remember your humanity even if they don't remember theirs.
Nov 14, 2018
Nov 14, 2018 at 8:54 AM UTC
Abled
Messingly sweet
Remembering your taste
In a cup of coffee
Sweating wet
Down my chin and over limb
I haven't heard
Spoken words
Designed over leave
Overseas, and for nearly free
Small size
I overcompensate my life
Messing memories
Swapping livelihoods
Words making their
Own way out
Oct 9, 2014
Oct 9, 2014 at 4:28 PM UTC
I’m sorry that you were a pleasure to have in class
And that you were
Quiet
That you didn’t understand simple
Social cues and that you
We’re stunted
But that you don’t know it yet.
I’m sorry that while in college you
Had the social skills of a
High schooler
And that you probably will
Never catch up
Socially.
So you act more mature.
I’m sorry you’ve had to overcompensate
In every aspect of your life
Just so you could feel
Normal.
And most of all
I’m sorry that you
Will find out in the worst possible way
How extraordinarily average
You really are.
Aug 31, 2019
Aug 31, 2019 at 12:17 PM UTC
One of these days
those static, predictable
moments
that you call chance
or good fortune
will become your
warmest reality.
You may take them
lightly or
overcompensate
at the moment,
but they will ultimately
define you,
especially if
by their absence.
May 16, 2017
May 16, 2017 at 1:14 PM UTC
go on a trip with me.
kick our heels on the ***** leather of your car,
only us three.
play soft tunes while i take blurry photos
that we can all laugh about in years to come.
i’ll bring along green tea.
that we can sip,
and try our hardest not to burn ourselves.
nobody-
will know of the laughs we shared,
when we ran away to make memories.
memories that’ll overcompensate for the loneliness:
the dread of the parting of a loved one,
the newfound freedom of a one person apartment,
and the thought of how we used to know each other.
Mar 28, 2020
Mar 28, 2020 at 3:20 PM UTC