You’re the reason why I wake up - immediately look at my phone every morning,
And the reason why I don’t get up
You’re also the reason why I stay up late all night wondering if you ever think about me,
the same way that I do about you every single night.
You’re the reason why I randomly laugh at random places - shockingly look at people because they’re wondering why I’m laughing and possibly expect that I’m crazy,
And the reason why I secretly cry from all the distressing words you say.
You’re the reason why I write,
And the reason why I don’t.
You’re the reason why I believe in myself that i can do good at everything and,
also the reason why I discourage myself.
You’re the reason why I’m happy,
but also the reason why I’m sad.
You’re the reason why I sing in the shower feeling like I’m in my own concert,
and also the reason why I drown myself in the water.
You’re the reason why I’m strong and,
also the reason why I can’t carry on.
You’re the reason why I’m allergic to cliché, all the lovey dovey type of love, and all the stupid fantasies.
You’re the reason why I play and,
the reason why I frozenly stare at the keys.
You’re the reason why I pass a day with a smile clipping butterflies in my stomach and,
also the reason why I scream at the top of my lungs, wanting the whole world to hear it.
You’re the reason why my heart isn’t longingly staying from its natural beat and,
also the reason why I can’t breathe.
You’re the reason why I’m in my right mind,
but also the reason why I’m demented, unstable and confused.
You’re the reason why I feel like I’m home - somehow fine and,
also the reason why I feel lost at most time.
You’re the reason why I stare at white walls and making unbelievable scenes in my head,
and also the reason why I keep myself busy to keep you off my mind.
You’re the reason why I think I make the right decisions,
but also the reason why I’m drowning from all the mistakes that I’ve done and you, pouring it into me.
You’re the reason why I take medicines to keep myself healthy and also,
the reason why I run away and fill tons of alcohol in my kidney.
You’re the reason why I’m understanding and patient.
You’re the reason why I’m still walking on my own feet and,
also the reason why I’m falling apart nearly on my knees.
You’re the reason why I stay,
and also the reason why I want to leave.
You’re the reason why I want you.
Yes, I do, blame you.
Because look what I have become,
I’m such a fool for you.
But darling, I really do,
want you.
You’re the reason I crave
and the reason why I cave.
You’re the reason why I have these walls and
the reason why it’ll slowly fall.
You’re the reason why I’m writing this long piece of crap with whole bunch of ‘you’re’s and ‘why’s.
I wonder…
Have I ever been your 'reason why’s?
