Good woman


Looking for a good woman;
Been looking for her my whole life through.
Searching for some good lovin’;
This is my search and it leaves me feeling so blue.


Tryin’ to find her, looking everywhere I go.
I’m just looking for a good woman.
Won’t you give me directions to her, if you know?
I’m just looking at the women as they all pass on by.
Waiting on a good woman.
I’ve been waiting my whole life.


I’ve met the most beautiful roses,
And they all wilted away.
I’ve seen the brightest moonbeams,
And they all faded with the passing days.
I’ve woken up next to Goddesses,
And I’ve slept next to ugly hearts.
I’ve wasted too much time on empty dresses.
I’ve broken pieces of me that can’t be cured with stars.


I’m singing songs of lovin’,
But I’m lonely as a bee.
I’m writing poems about love,
But love is a thing I ain’t ever seen.
I’ve seen a thousand imitators,
And I’ve wined and dined a million fakes.
I’ve listened to other people’s stories;
All the lovers and all those I hate.
I could never believe their souls were good for me,
Because all I have ever known is misery.


Still time to find a good woman, they say.
I’ve still got time on my hands, so I pray.
I’ve been sitting on my hands forever.
I hope opposites truly do attract,
Because I am such a stupid man,
And I am still left here waiting for my love-life to get better.


(C)2018 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.

Existence.


As the darkness falls, I feel the walls are closing in.
There is no chance of escape.
My mind, it calls.
A universe of all my thoughts are keeping me awake.


The fear is here, the dreaded time.
Half past midnight, no light,
Just frightened of the future ahead.
Lying in bed alone, in the altogether, thinking about the here and now.


Tomorrow is just another ordinary day, they say.
I think not; give it all you have got, or fail again,
To find my feet, my spot, my place, in this empty world.
I am an empty glass; I need a place to exist.
Money earned means nothing to me,
Because love is free if you give it your all.
Cash is only paper, metal works too.
I want for nothing, so nothing soothes.


My mind a mathematician, counting sheep.
I am currently at two thousand and seventeen
And I am bored of everything,
Because I have no one to count on, or entertain,
My vain brain that only thinks about me;
All I truly care about right now is sleep.


I took an early night to book an earlier flight,
But my dreams are all delayed…
I am sure they will arrive in due time,
But I have to wait with nothing on my mind,
Because there is nothing that interests me.


My hopes and wishes are all so boring,
That you do not need to see.
I will not mention, guess what;
I will simply carry on with this pointless tale I tell.
I reach into the well and find a day so sunny;
Wouldn’t it be funny if animals could talk…


Time to get up, stand up and take a walk.
I drag myself out of bed this morn
And spend all day yawning, when nothing is boring,
So people see a distorted truth, an illusion,
Hence the confusion that follows my soul.
They all watch me as I go; true heart remains unknown.


Then I leave them all behind, close my eyes
And climb into my bed alone.
I wrap the quilt around my heart to keep me warm,
Because my love…life is…so cold.


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.

Fear of commitment


It seems you want to see me laughing.
I think I could try, but where is the fun?
It seems you want to see me happy,
But the scratches down my back have long since gone.


Maybe I could find a way to begin chatting up,
But the silence I hold. What is love?
No more for the meter,
I have a wheel clamp on the tongue.
It seems I should by now be with my love,
But this continuous car crash that is my love life…
It just ain’t letting up.


I crash and burn at each and every turn.
If only I could take control of this life that I live,
But I am only ever destined to be hurt
And to lose my hope in everything.


The smile I raise will never grow up;
The lies I tell keep me grounded.
My ego has a life of its own, so it’s tough,
To keep my mind on the level.
No safety net, I fall alone…unbounded.


I see a light, I follow it,
It only leads me to where I once was.
I ignore the light and wander blind,
I walk in the dark; I end up lost
And then I see another reflection in a mirror;
Another time when I was myself
And there I see I am no nearer to leaving this maze,
This endless place I dwell.


The walls I put up are a hundred feet tall;
No horizon to be seen or to chase after.
The map to this life is never written, just walked;
One mistake at a time,
So gone is my laughter.


I see the end, the gate is locked;
I climb over the top and down I drop.
When I get to the other side,
I find myself back at the beginning.
Woe is my revolving life.


Around and around in circles I go,
Into love I fall so deep it hurts.
I pick myself up and wait until it is long ago,
Then I fall again, repeating those empty words I hear from her.


Now they mean nothing,
Hoping for something to change,
But it all remains the same.
Love is just a revolving door with a queue.
Waiting on someone.  Waiting on you.
Serving you drinks, while you kiss and hug him.
Waiting to leave all of this!
But love is my cage and I am locked in.


So I waited…until I broke;
Never to be repaired.
Never again!
Never again will I wait,
To once more go away to allow me to breathe air.


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.