I am beyond what I see and am what I feel.
Flowing to the sea,
bring me back to you.
Under the stars, dreaming of the shore
The way he looked
as he walked across the bare cement floor,
basement near done, but that was close enough,
his footsteps become my ****** pulse
Tobacco between his teeth,
No look to me, none at all, but we all knew we were there
Someone lit the fire
I know who,
we all knew we were there,
though
when I think of the one with the rolled affection,
everyone else melts into a painting on the wall
Shadow puppets gaily riot
trapped by the blank stare
a dance of their own

his dark curls are his most obscuring feature, but they lit up the basement that night
He lit me up
Like a cigarette that would burn at both ends
taking life away twice as fast
giving thrice the reason to live
making me fall infinitely more into him
all while knowing
I can never have him

turns out I’m not as funny as I thought I was
also, turns out people who you talk to online are real people.
what
that’s weird
and nice
today I watched Scrubs for the first time
the main character is kind of cute
I do not like his friends ****** hair
today I watched the sunset in a field for the second night in a row
I decided I want to do this every single day
and I want people to come with me
but nobody wants to and I’m kind of sad about it
my friend is asleep and I’m not
if she were not here I would probably be crying about music
thx
when people ask what I write I have no idea what to tell them
because mostly people wouldn’t consider this poetry and I wouldn’t either
I just like writing small thoughts I think
I don’t know
I’m confused as ****
I’m nervous a lot of the time
I cannot keep eye contact with people because I am nervous at those times
that’s okay probably
she just made a noise that sounded happy while sleeping

I’m now listening to Goodbye Horses over and over
wow
I really love this song a lot
and it’s a song I’ll hear again when I’m, I don’t know, 23 or something
and I’ll hear it in someone’s house
while I’m laughing at something and then I’ll say
“I used to love this song”
and nobody will care except for me
and then I’ll cry in the bathroom with the song playing in the distance and the sound of people yelling over it
I imagine myself to be homeless at least once in my life
holy.dhit
****
there’s this ad on spotify about ******* hot dogs and I swear to god ig comes on between every song and I’m going to tfucking cut my legs off if I hear it again I promise you I will I do not care if the hot dog is kosher please stop advertising hot dogs it’s not something that needs advertising honeslty people buy hot dogs zzso often I’m tired
anyway
the song started again
um
I really want to have a neighbor that is not very old
and I will go to their house often and talk about food and point out the sound of their voice sounds nice and we can go outside and say things outside at night . ****

i thought you were cool until i fell in love with you
then i started to hate you (and loving you)

i dont know, your eyes bother me because i like them a lot
and when i watched a movie and saw a girl with the same eyes
i cried a lot (dont tell anybody i did that)

your voice sounds so nice when its yelling songs at 10pm under moonlight
and i wish that was a sound i could hear more often
but u dont care 4 me (whatevr)

I love how when you visit

You sit on the other couch silently

Reading your book



How every minute or so

I hear the flipping of flimsy

Pages



Sometimes, when I glance at you

I see different emotions passing

Across your face



I love to watch you change position

As you shift your body

Across the sofa



I love how you bury yourself

Into the literature so that you

Don’t even hear me talk



But that’s okay because

Watching you quietly is

All I really need.



l.r.

Writing poetry at 3 AM because the drugs haven't worn off and neither have you.

I stood there and watched him kiss her. And all I wanted to do was rip out her bleeding heart and wedge it between my hands, squeezing it so that in some way his pain would heal my pain.