I remember when I was a child I disliked reading books , mostly all of them . They all had a specific ending it could be happy or sad and sometimes something in between. Somehow  I knew that I could never read the words writen in my heart by someone elses pen  so unknowingly I started writing. I started writing as what a normal child would have to, when he starts to dream and imagine about all the things that one wants and desires and everything one knows he could be. I started writing in the blank page of life . I wrote my desires my ideals my character my adventures and everything else I thought I needed my life to be about. Pages full of happines, memories , mistakes and terrible regrets. All my darkest desires ,darkest secrets my best and worst qualities. Since I was a child the only thing I didn't give importance was time , time was passing fast right before my eyes into the words I was writing on that blank page . I never stood still to realise that until now .  My life was turning into my worst nightmare filled only with paranoia and fears. I never realised that getting so hooked into what you want life to be and what it actually is would turn my reality upside down and realised I was living in a lie that I was writing . As I was stading alone in the dark yesterday I woke up . The page I started to write since I was a child run out of all empty spaces , I dont know how old I was back than but now I'm 21 and the worst thing is that I realised that I'm one of those humans helplessly stupid and I've wasted so much time rewriting and correcting on that blank page everything that I thought was wrong and now my blank page looked like the messy adventurous confusion I wanted my life to be. Today I woke up and I  had a new page to write on and I've only writed four sentences  the only four sentences I decided to keep as a treasure from my life
as far as today.
To desire is to dream
To dream is to want
to want is to do
And to do is to live.

To love one’s self
To accept her flaws instead of thinking out why she’s helpless
Know that you are amazing
in you; you can find love
when you treat yourself better
you also treat yourself with the
love and care you deserve
Know that you are stronger
than any storms
and that we all
have different battles that we are facing
in our life everyday
But know that we can get through this
And learn to be mindful with the present
And step by step
begin to be grateful for yourself,
for the air that you breathe, for the food that you eat,
for the people that loves you,
for the nature that nourish
you to flourish.
And be your kind of love
because you do this for yourself
to accept, to love,
and to embrace who you are
because you deserve
the right treatment
to be your own uniqueness.

self importance he did relish
therein lay a swollen ego
was inflated of embellish
all this being held as a cargo

therein lay a swollen ego
so monumental the extent
all this being held as a cargo
of the largest conceited tent

so monumental the extent
it could not be denied at all
of the largest conceited tent
he finding joy in his own thrall

it could not be denied at all
ever putting one's self up first
he finding joy in his own thrall
was no shown quelling of the thirst

ever putting one's self up first
all this being held as a cargo
was no shown quelling of the thirst
therein lay a swollen ego

We pretend that we're special. We pretend that we're important.
We think our issues warrant a poem. And that poem is special.
Race issues, orientation issues, disorders, disabilities.
Our problems are unique. Our problems are all different.
But you are not different. You are not unique.
None of us are special.

Say a prayer
to stay connected with the universe;
Say a prayer
to give your soul a little faith;
Say a prayer
to massage your mind;
Say a prayer
to let go of your worries;  
Say a prayer
for tranquility;
Say a prayer
to calm your conscience;
Say a prayer
to restore lost hope;
Say a prayer
to set your spirit free.