bitter is wrapped up in my world lived in vain.
bitter is inhaling my laughter, exhaling his pain.
i think bitter is precious to me--
he lets me do things i'd never do willingly.
when bitter is sleeping i am awake
his darkness is gone but my bones, they still shake.
i think bitter is the reason i cry.
i think bitter wants me to die.
bitter shot my brain with a gun,
stabbed my heart with a knife
and broke me with a word.
one word that made me this--
a girl who dreams in only black and white.
a girl who speaks to herself at night.
a girl who thinks despair is complete delight.
the word bitter said to me was hello.
and now bitter is me -- my darkened soul.
  :)

Does it matter more to you that you care for others or that others care for you?
Would you take a series of bullets
Would you leap before a dashing car
Would you dance on sweltering embers for the sake of one who does you nought in return?
Wouldn’t most or wouldn’t anyone endure the worst for acknowledgement and commendation…

I try to be gallant—self-sacrificial,
Try to be benevolent, bleeding heart beyond comprehension
Yet am I worse than the slaughterers?
The iniquitous, the rest?
No more than the vile, reprobate, devilish…
For who, after all,
Cast oneself beyond forgiveness
The felon who would exploit acts of selflessness
To assemble his own
Maleficent, pernicious lair
Of praise, acclaim, and comfort.