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Psych-o-rangE Jan 2024
You can fit the whole world in a sandwich

Your hopes, your dreams, your heart and your desires. Grip it tight

And choke on it
Austin Sessoms Dec 2023
All my **** got repossessed
By an aardvark in a leather vest
That he swears is only vinyl
But won’t tell me where to buy my own

He says if I can go six months
With no late payments
On my credit card statements
He’ll let the name slip

I’ve got to get my **** together
Or this cruelty-free vegan sleeveless pleather
Statement piece might slip away from me

So, these days, I’m
Dedicated to paying
This debt I’ve accumulated
Despite the social detriment
Withdrawal and depressive episodes
All in the name of
Improving my credit score

Until when?
The day comes up
That I’ve paid for the stuff
That I bought without paying for
I’m practically stable
By now

The aardvark from the IRS
Reappears as my remaining debt and interest
Dwindles into a less pressing account
For the withholding public servant
Who’s about to grant me access
To the privileged information
I’ve been craving for months

It was an Etsy shop
And they’re all sold out
CIIR Dec 2023
Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I hate that you are far.
Like a diamond in the sky,
What regret, I could not fly.
So I sold my soul for wings,
And greet whatever darkness brings...
MS.572 | Nadzyea's words as the Moon is abandoned: she is recalled to the futile needs of a doomed Earth that demands her skills
Goddess of USR Oct 2023
Holding out hope
Like a hand reaching through time
Holding space
Providing the arrows that pierce my heart

Thinking of you
Longing for you
Vacillating
Unable to ever truly close the door on our connection

I guess I did it to myself
Giving love to someone who never deserved me
Trusting what I felt instead of what I saw
Allowing you to occupy the space without ever filling it
Choosing to respect what felt stronger than anything I’ve ever known

I guess I did it to myself
Fooling
Blinding
Reaching
You left the room
Without so much as an "I’m grateful that you’re here"
Without so much as an "I love you too"
Without so much as a thread of hope

I guess I did it to myself
Provided the bow and quiver
Placed it steadfastly and aimed it straight for the heart

I guess I did it to myself, opened myself up for disappointment
You left the conversation without so much as a "Seeing you sent my heart soaring and my mind racing"
All of the timelines between us collapsed and there we were face to face
She standing in her truth and he still stuck in a lie
Fearful that if his heart ever stood for itself, the facade would crumble and shatter at his feet
And he would find himself naked with only one truth they know: love

I guess I did it to myself, allowing love to pass through me for you
Living in parallel universes with you
Because you asked me to

I guess I did it to myself, showing up in the now and wanting you to hold me the way I hold you

I’m exhausted
Saddened by you and for what could be

I kick boulders not rocks
Boulders
Boulders
Boulders
Boulders into pebbles until I find peace with you and skip trace them across the frequencies until they lay at your feet, constant reminders of the path you choose between us

Pebbles of love, sun, wine, hammocks, song, black and white, solitude together, heartbreak, silence, grey check marks, music, promises unkept, Irish goodbyes and outright lies

I will find peace with you in the love of another man’s arms until there is no peace because he is not you

Why did we ever have to meet?
What wrong thing in my existence did I ever do to deserve you?

I guess I did it to myself, believing in you, in love, in siempre
Pierced with the fiercest of arrows

I kick boulders not rocks
Boulders
Boulders
Boulders
Boulders into pebbles until I find peace with you and skip trace them across the frequencies until they lay at your feet, constant reminders of the path you choose between us

I’m sick of seeing the green guy, something needs to change. Show me love.
For CBM aid Dublin. Sent with a thousand kisses and tears.
B Oct 2023
Don't think I'll go on, but I can
my mother is kicking me out
and I've never had a plan.
Fizzled out with your opening
crushed like a soda pop can
so insecure, pushed you away
because you know just who I am.

On such a breathless downward spiral
and I think I'll stay here a while.
baggy shirts and sunken eyes
has become my style.
I'm a muddled, mangy mess, no surprise
I think I'll just stay a child
be soft in my stride
for just a little while
until I learn to get by.
Chloe Sep 2023
I emptied my pockets for you
You didn’t have any change
I read the sign that says
“no larger bills”
My bad, but you still took
all my money away
You took all my money away
Meandering Words Sep 2023
she may have claimed
that she could always
find one of those rare
desperately sought
four-leaf clovers
amongst any cluster
that had sprouted
amidst the grass
and **** growth
of park or pasture
but never once did she
try to find one
for me
Austin Sessoms Sep 2020
I watched an episode and a half before
remembering my laundry in the washer
needed changing over
but the dryer hadn’t finished with the
bathroom rugs
despite having finished its cycle so
I turned the dial around to the dot and
twisted the **** to the right
prompting the rickety dryer to tumble
the dampness from the still-damp rugs
if possible
while my clothing sat off to the side
in a pile to soak and
I hope not but
possibly mildewed
Ackerrman Aug 2023
I am never enough
In your scowling eyes,
Your voice is coarse and rough,
No care for how the blood dries.

No care for my welfare,
Just how it affects you.
Remember when you said 'she left you because of the drugs'?
Well ******* too.

And **** when you told me
'I never said that'
Where is your sympathy
You gas lighting rat.

Go ahead and press my buttons
To see me light up,
And when I do,
You play victim.

The meds I take
Are to deal with you.
Your care is fake,
You pretend you don't have a clue.

When I try and tell you
How I feel,
The words don't get through,
Responsibility not so quick on your heel.

You make dinner
For everyone but me,
My patience is growing thinner,
Your hate is like a tree

Taking root under my family,
And now I am the wretch,
The cans in my room, so pretty,
You self absorbed *****.

Not big on self regulation,
Or object permanence,
Day on day commotion
Starts again, what a performance.

The rage I have for you,
You taught me well,
I am black all the way through,
And water does not quell.

Alcoholic,
Just like you taught,
This life is chaotic
K cider 7.5% store bought.

Why does Dad have to die of cancer
And you continue to breath?
You death dodging dancer,
Every sip is a seethe.

You shouldn't be allowed around children,
You dangerous psychopath,
A hateful haven,
Blood soaked epitaph.

So here is wishing
You a swift death,
Or maybe go missing,
I don't want to hear another breath.

You won't get a funeral.
You are being cremated.
And I won't be there
To bring you back from the crematorium.
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